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Is he trying to have the best of both worlds by coming around for my company no strings attached while still getting to socialise with his friends as a single person?

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Question - (6 February 2007) 1 Answers - (Newest, 7 February 2007)
A female age 36-40, anonymous writes:

A guy who I have been interested in for awhile has a reputation for being a bit of a player. He paid me attention on and off for 6 months but recently has been visiting me once or twice a week. During one of these visits he brought his best friend with him and we all had dinner together and watched movies. He often stays the night and we fool around a bit but he said he wants to wait to sleep together. He said that he finds me very attractive. We have great conversation and laughs together. He has however never asked me to a party or on a date and sometimes visits me after he has been hanging out with his friends. Is he trying to have the best of both worlds by coming around for my company no strings attached while still getting to socialise with his friends as a single person? Or is he taking his time getting to know me to see if we are compatible? Am very confused. I'm not the type of girl to chase a guy or crowd them but am starting to get feelings for this person and don't want to get hurt.

View related questions: best friend, player

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (7 February 2007):

AskEve agony auntHe seems nice enough but just watch he's not just taking advantage of your hospitality, especially as he's started to take a friend with him, you give them both dinner then watch a movie, stays with you when he wants to (even although there's no sex... YET!)

It may be he just likes you as a friend, he might not fancy you, he might just be looking for a place to chill and have his ego boosted, he may genuinely like you and want to get to know you better.

In future, I would say to him, after 9.30pm I don't want you coming round as it's too late, especially when you've been out with friends! That way you'll get your privacy and not be invaded by people you don't know. It will also let him see you're no pushover and won't be used but you are assertive enough to have some ground rules.

You'll soon see it time whether or not his feelings are genuine or not.

Eve

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