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Is he more interested in sex than me? now all he seems concerned about is how soon we can become a couple and start having sex

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 October 2011) 10 Answers - (Newest, 31 October 2011)
A female Australia age 22-25, anonymous writes:

Hey guys would love an outsiders opinion to this...

Long story short I've met this amazing guy two weeks ago who is sweet, cute, funny and matched and rivalled my humour and we got on really well. We've been talking non stop over this time and although he understands its only been a week or so, he's confessed that he's completely taken with me and wants us to see how we go in future.

Being honest with myself I started feeling this way towards him as well...and now that I've expressed this to him also, now all he seems concerned about is how soon we can become a couple and start having sex. Like seriously? His texts have gone from shy and cute to "I wanna bend you over my desk and..." etc etc

What the heck has just happened? I can't explain it, it's just so..not him. Or so I thought.

View related questions: shy, text

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (31 October 2011):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntPerhaps you're able to decipher from this that guys have ONE (and ONLY one) thing on their mind when they approach a girl.... and it ain't sharing a malted with 2 straws in the same glass!!!!!!

Good luck....

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A female reader, YouWish United States + , writes (31 October 2011):

YouWish agony auntGood lord. This guy is gross!

Two weeks and he's pressuring you heavily for sex and doing it in this crude fashion.

MAJOR RED FLAG!

Get away from him and fast! He wants to USE you. He's not interested in getting to know you. He is seducing you by putting on the charm act. After he gets his way he will throw you out like a dirty condom. RUN!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011):

That is a typical player, he pretends to be so sweet and even shy but he isn't too smart so his real intentions become obvious very soon. Leave him, he is not worth a second of your attention.

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A male reader, olderthandirt United States +, writes (31 October 2011):

olderthandirt agony auntYeah, the bend over the desk thing says it all. He lives in a fantasy world and a kinky one at that. If I were a girl and in this situation, I'd dump him and haul buggy.

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A female reader, babygirllovej Canada +, writes (31 October 2011):

babygirllovej agony auntI have to agree with everyone. He probably is looking for just sex. You barely know him so tread carefully.

Do you know his friends?

How did you meet him?

That kind of a history does he have? (ex: known to flirt with girls...etc.) or do you not know his history?

I wouldn't jump into a relationship with him right away. Wait until you know him. Tell him to knock it off about sex. Set him straight that your NOT going to have sex with him and that his comments are offending you.

You deserve much more respect then that. If he really wants to in a relationship with you then he needs to show you he cares and respects you.

Take care and don't rush!

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A female reader, chigirl Norway + , writes (31 October 2011):

chigirl agony auntAh, you didn't know him too well after all. You got on great, but he turned out to be just another perv.

How about you ask him what's up with that? That you liked him, and might have thought of a relationship with him, but that his focusing on sex isn't anything that attracts you. If he wants you then he wants you, NOT sex. If he just wants sex he needs to go elsewhere. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean he'll get to "bend you over" any time soon either.

This guy sounds like what you fear.. just another perv who is only interested in sex. He's not even in a relationship with you and already he's eager to bend you over. Set him straight and give him a chance to prove that sex isn't all that's on his mind and that you aren't just some piece of meat for him to bend over. It could be he is genuinely interested and is only trying to act cool, in which case he lacks experience with women and have no idea how we work.

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (31 October 2011):

Danielepew agony auntI have the feeling that he badly wants sex. I don't know whether that is all he wants, but I would be careful. Why don't you tell him that you want to know him better? Make him wait and see what happens.

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A male reader, doublejack United States +, writes (31 October 2011):

I have to agree with the other advice given so far. This guy wants sex, and it doesn't appear he's genuinely interested in a relationship. He's not the person you thought, he had you fooled. Once you expressed interest in him, he dropped his act and decided to go in for "the kill". Unfortunately a lot of young men, and even a fair number of older ones, are this way. If you want something serious it is best to move on from this guy, as it is likely you'll end up getting used and hurt.

Best of luck!

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States + , writes (31 October 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntmen fall fast then crash and burn...

you met him two weeks ago and say "this is just so not him" but yes yes it is him.

2 months is not a long time to know someone... 2 weeks is NOTHING.

he wants sex.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy + , writes (31 October 2011):

Anonymous 123 agony auntWell this side to him which you never knew existed, because he was busy trying to charm you with the "shy and cute" tactics, to get you to like him.

Sorry OP, this one's upto no good. No guy with honorable intentions would talk about sex so early on, even before anything's started, AND in such a brash manner.

Yes, he is ONLY interested in sex. This is the real him.

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