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Is he developing feelings for me?

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 January 2014) 6 Answers - (Newest, 7 January 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *mmaxbaby writes:

Ive been friends with a guy for just over a week and its a friends with benefits thing, we've seen each other most nights and he has stayed the night a couple of times.

He says things like we should go away for the weekend and offers to take me out etc, He said he likes spending time with me and holds my hand and hugs me all the time and is very affectionate to me, and he says im a passionate person and very affectionate. He also said he told his mate about me.

One night I said as a joke if he had any single friends he could set me up with and he said he wouldnt as he wanted to keep me for his self and he would worry i would prefer his friends to him. One night we laid in bed just talking and sharing personal things about ourselves to each other. Everything just seems really intense. I had a bad previous relationship and my ex was violent and he said he would never be violent to me, then he quickly said 'but were just good friends anyway', then he says things like 'I kind of like you'. Everything is so intense considering this only started just over a week ago. Do you think hes starting to develop feelings for me?

View related questions: friend with benefits, my ex, violent

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (7 January 2014):

eyeswideopen agony auntI just wish I had jumped on the stock option when this "Friends With Benefits" became a legitimate relationship. Dang

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A female reader, Lieutenant United Kingdom +, writes (7 January 2014):

You're offering sex of demand. Men will tell you anything they think you want to hear if you're free sex; especially with no strings attached.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (7 January 2014):

CindyCares agony auntNo, I think he is bullshitting you. Talk is cheap, and at the end of the day , he is nice and cuddly and all, but, he was quick to add " we are just friends anyway ".

Why, in your opinion ? I mean, if not only sex is good, but he also kind of likes you, wants to spend time with you, go out with you, travel with you etc... well then why can't he date properly and officially ?

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A female reader, sugarplum786 South Africa +, writes (7 January 2014):

sugarplum786 agony auntHi, if you want more and have started to develop feelings, I suggest an open talk is important. Don't continue a FWB relationship with any expectation as you will just get hurt. I would either end this FWB or have an open conversation to avoid any heartache in the future.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2014):

Seriously!? How strong can feelings develop over a week?

The sex is good and readily available. Why wouldn't he be pleased with the arrangements.

It's just sweet-talk to keep the juices flowing. I suggest you give it a couple of months.

If the sex stopped, would he still like you so much?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2014):

"Do you think hes starting to develop feelings for me?"

No, he's just telling you what you want to hear so he can continue getting laid regularly while being sure he makes absolutely no promises, implied or otherwise.

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