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Is cyber sex just as bad as physical cheating?

Tagged as: Cheating, Online dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 January 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 8 October 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *needhelpasap writes:

Hi, i have a problem i am in a happy relationship i have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he works away in the week i only see him at weekends. I have been chatting to this guy online but i also now him, everytime we talk after a while it turns into cyber sex. I no this is wrong but do you think its just as bad as cheating physically ?

its just writing not cam or anything please help and no nasty comments please.

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A male reader, sukumaran Indonesia +, writes (8 October 2010):

Though it is not phisically, mentally you are cheating that guy.

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A male reader, jack3209 United Kingdom +, writes (20 August 2009):

Take it from me stop what you are doing you will destroy your relationship if your bf finds out, i know this from experience except i was married and it's left me emotionally scarred and unable to trust anybody again i caught my wife shoving dildos up her self and sending pics to various different men, it can lead to things like that, she also exchanged numbers and was arranging to meet someone, this all started from idol chit chat online, it broke our marriage and our family i now only get to see my kids twice a week now all because of cyber sex i am still mentally fucked from this whole experience and don't wish to begin another relationship again, so please take it from me and think about the consequences.

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A female reader, Podge United Kingdom +, writes (29 January 2009):

Podge agony auntin my opinion this is close to cheating. However, if its not emotional just fullfilling your physical needs then its easily avoidable. if its turning into an emotional thing stop right now instead of havign cyebr sex with this guy just think about your own boyfriend, a few dirty texts maybe?

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (29 January 2009):

It's maybe not as bad as having an affair but it's close. Imagine your boyfriend saying those kinds of things to some girl he's friends with online.

It still counts as cheating and you need to stop it before you get caught.

If you can't stop or you can't handle the fact your boyfriend can't give you the time you need then let him find a girl who will love him as much as he loves her.

If you are singe you will be free to cyber to your hearts content.

Good Luck!! xx

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A female reader, KickRox United States +, writes (29 January 2009):

KickRox agony auntYes, I consider this cheating. The fact that you're posting this tells us that you're feeling somewhat guilty. So, yes I would stop the chatting online.

Think about this..you're explaining to that person what you'd be doing to them if they were next to you. And what if you continue this and later on you both decide to meet up? Then what's next...?

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A female reader, Jmo United States +, writes (29 January 2009):

Jmo agony auntAn emotional affair is (in my mind) almost worse than a physical one. Having several of both myself, I know. However, the question you should be asking yourself is not "is this just as bad as cheating physically" but "why am I doing this?". Why do you allow the chats to turn sexual? The fact that you have posted this suggests that you already feel somewhat guilty and know that what you're doing is wrong. I'd suggest discontinuing this online friendship (at least sexually but I can't tell you how to live your life. On the bright side it doesn't sound like your real relationship is in jeopardy.

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