A
female
age
30-35,
*uucy
writes:Okay, so it's my 18th very soon and my boyfriend who I have been with since I was 14 has mentioned getting me an egagment ring more than once. I have thought about it seriously and I want to say yes but I cant help thinking perhaps we are too young. I love him to bits and I really do want to get engaged and getting married to him in the future and for 3 years we have always talked about our future.... So I really don't know whats holding me back :( I guess I am a little concerned about how people will say 'you're far too young' and it matters to me what people think, especially my family.Is 18 really too young in your opinion?I guess I'm looking for a bit of reassurance but I am very open to people who may not agree.Thank you :)
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female
reader, Emaz help +, writes (25 July 2010):
 I really don't think it's too young, 2 of my friends are engaged, one was 16 and the other 17 when it happend. Just because you are engaged doesn't mean that you have to get married straight away. If you're family disagree then explain to them that you love each other and aren't going to get married in the next few weeks lol Engagement shows commitment but marriage should hold you together for eternity and you are still too young to actually get married so wait a good few years until you go the whole way
:)
A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom +, writes (25 July 2010):
 I am not against young engagement under the right circumstances. Firstly, you have been togetehr for four years, so you do stand a very good chance of being together for a while more. People change a lot during their teens but you and your boyfriend have pulled through.
How often do you and your boyfriend see each other and for how long? A lot of couples split up after they move in together because they can't handle being with each other all the time. I think that before getting engaged, maybe you should move in together and see if it works out for the first few months.
Thirdly, if you do get engaged, don't rush into the wedding. Get through your studies and take your time planning. Then, if anything does change, then you will still have time without having to get divorced.
You shouldn't care what other people think of you, but it's easier said than done when it's your parents. Do your family know your boyfriend well? Do they know how long you've been together? Because your boyfriend and your family need to get to know each other, so that your family know you're in safe hands with him, and then they'll be happier that you two are getting married.
Good luck, I hope you get engaged and it all works out =]
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2010): The general rule of announcing an engagement is to get engaged and then married within a reasonable amount of time after -- no more than two years, which is a little long, even.
Will you two be financially secure then? Will you both be capable of holding down full-time jobs to pay for everything (seeing as getting married means becoming totally independent of your parents)? Is he someone you really want to spend the rest of your life with?
These are things to consider. You should talk to him about what you're feeling before he spends money on a ring or gets down on one knee.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2010): I would say definetly too young. Just as your not really the same person when your 14 as you are 18, who you are is going to change alot by the time your 22. I'm 24 now and 'settling down' with my boyfriend is still scary to me. I had a few friends in highschool who got married young, around 18 or 19 and all of them are either divorced or miserable, because they think they tried to grow up too quickly. However, that's just generally speaking. Only you can really know if you're ready or not, and if your having doubts, you might want to trust your gut...
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