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Into older men and don't know what to do about it! Help!

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 April 2010) 7 Answers - (Newest, 19 May 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am 18 and I can not imagine myself with guys my age! I think there is a problem with me. Whenever I have a fantasy or anything about making out or having sex, I always see myself with old men, and by old I mean men in their 40s and 50s! I am a very outgoing person and I am at parties all the time and I have never made out with any guy!! My friends say that I am crazy. I don't know why but I just feel disgusted even when I think about making out with guys my age. A lot of guys have asked me out and wanted to be in a relationship with me but I have declined them all. I don't know why I am into much older men. Please help!

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A female reader, nothing.lasts.and.nothing's.lost United Kingdom +, writes (19 May 2010):

nothing.lasts.and.nothing's.lost agony auntThere's nothing wrong with that at all :] I'm 21, I've only ever been attracted to older men, from when I was a young teenager even. I think mentally it stems from associating older men, with maturity, being more experienced, and caring, and stable. Whereas if you take a lot of young people your age, you get quite the opposite. But this isn't always the case, I've been in a relationship with an older man, that's had the maturity of a teenager. For me, I think I'm attracted to older men based on physical attraction as well as the whole idea of maturity. I like lines on a mans face, they tell a story, show history and life, and I find it very attractive. Plus, do you see many gentlemen your own age? I don't think I ever have! Not to say they don't exsist, but all so just the general interests of youth today. I'm not catogorizing all young men here, but sometimes I think my interests are more of an older generation, and I don't connect with men my own age as well as I do with the older man. Ultimatly, it could be that your attraction for older men, is because you're older minded and mature yourself.

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A male reader, kevin67 United States +, writes (11 May 2010):

There is nothing wrong with you.I am 42 and I very much like younger females.No I am not a pervert,I just enjoy and like younger women,and I don't think there is anything wrong with it.If everyone was the same it would be a very boring world.I take great pride in being different than alot of people,because I am myself. You are who you are and you should accept yourself for who you are, and if people don't like you for who you are, then they are not really your friends.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010):

Ughhh, father replacement? No! It's just normal, I'm into older guys, I'd like to think I was more mature but I doubt it, anyway imminent a great relationship with a guy in his mid 40's he's Irish 6'2" in good shape;) and well hung... Unfortunately I can't tell anyone except my close friends who I trust as he'd get onto so much trouble.

Older guys are hot, end of

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2010):

I don't understand why anyone thinks they have the right to judge a person for their feelings - Does anyone have the right to decide what is right with an age or what is right for the different colors or different hair color - lol - A psycologist only knows and thinks what they have been taught to think - Just like everybody in the world - they only know and understand what they have been told. Word of advise tho - Be very sure not to get mixed up with a guy that will hurt you in any way. Best of luck and be very careful.........

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A female reader, goowes United States +, writes (1 May 2010):

goowes agony auntHHmmm, maybe you want to be with someone who is mature and not still learning how to behave, or established and can be a good provider. It isn't a bad attraction, what do you think about it that makes you think to look for info. Women over history have chosen older mates to secure a reliable situation for good financial care and securtiy for thier family.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I don't have any father issues. I have a really good relationship with my father.

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A female reader, goowes United States +, writes (1 May 2010):

goowes agony auntI am not a psycologist but that sounds like classic father replacement issues. Look at your learning regarding fathers and men, your examples and what you feel you did'nt get and know yourself before you make choices, it looks like you are smart, you are already questioning it on your own!

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