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In love with my daughter in law...

Tagged as: Forbidden love<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 October 2009) 15 Answers - (Newest, 14 December 2010)
A male United States age , anonymous writes:

Ok here it goes...I find myself deeply in love with my daughter in law..I want to have sex so bad with her..Sometimes when my son invites me over,I tell him I can't today....They have 3 little girls..I hate to do something that will break them up,but The desire is killing me..I dream of her all the time...She is so sexy looking...She has all I have ever wanted in a woman...I have been single for a long time and am much older than her.....What is wrong with me..I sometimes think I should tell her how I feel,but then again I don't want to cause any issues...What do you think I should do about this....

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A male reader, DonWinston Canada +, writes (14 December 2010):

Don't be discouraged. You never know what may come about with this situation. Would love to hear an update!

But I know kind of where you are coming from. My Son brought his lovely partner home for the first time 3 years ago after they had already been together for nearly a year and i was immediately floored by her beauty. She was 24, tall and absolutely stunning. I of course didn't think of her in any sexual terms again after the immediate verdict. I was just pleased for him. About a year later they were engaged and it was all smooth. Then not long after the wedding last year I began seeing her a little bit just through circumstance and we got to talking. She confided in me that he was not a great lover and she was disappointed with his size. When I asked why she would tell me such things she told me that HE had told her that I was a very impressive length. I got curious and decided to show it to her. within two weeks we began having intimate, regular sex which we both enjoyed immensely. She says I am bigger and better than he and so I just enjoy my time with her but keep it very discreet. It works, in a weird way.

Don

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2009):

I to my friend are in the same situation. I have seen my sons wife mature from a young pretty college freshmen...to a dotting loving mother and wife to my son. She is also so beautiful to me even after having put on some pounds after having two children. I only hope that my son loves her as much or more so then I do.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009):

to the last male poster, you are actually encouraging grandpa in grooming his daughter in law. two old sickos. sick, perverted,

what about family values. his son . his grandkids. you just gave the old man permission to go fuck his daughter. some family man, right?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009):

You obviously need some help...

And I am no selfish bastard, so here it is... free of charge.

Are you in shape? How's your wardrobe? Could it use a little "updating"? Are you overweight? How's you skin? Nasty habits? Bald? What is your current financial situation? Can you still perform in the bed? Ask yourself questions like these. Answer them honestly. If you find that you are sorely lacking in any important quality that an ordinarily hot young woman like your son's wife might find important, you need to stop wasting time (and energy) masturbating to dead end pipe dreams and get on with a serious plan of action that will help you compensate for your deficiencies. Join a gym, take dance classes, buy a sporty new foreign auto, get a second job to improve your balance sheet - young women are suckers (literally) for these last two. Take it from one old fart that has been hittin' the young hunnies with little effort for years;)

Remember, you are dealing with younger, more energetic and less wrinkly competition. Not to mention one that is going to be understandably surprised and probably not very understanding of your "needs." I'm not going to sugar coat it. This one is GOING to be tough.

Play it slow (not too hard to do for and old dude like yourself.) You're going to have to ease her (and your family) into the transition you have planned. Start by inviting her to coffee when your son's out of town. Shower her with innocent compliments and gifts. My experience tells me that younger chicks always fall for that type of stuff.

Find out if she's also into you. Show her a few of those trashy 70s flicks where the old dude always gets the young chick half his age. Use this a way to get her to tell you whether she might also fall for a fatherly sorta guy like yourself under the right conditions. You might even ask, jokingly of course, whether she might ever do a guy like Sean Connery or Patrick Stewart if she had the chance. You'd be surprised to learn how many chicks are into these guys, despite that you'd have to cut off one of their legs and count the rings to find out how old they are.

If you're up for it (again quite literally) you even might take a chance and "mistakenly" walk into her bedroom naked while your son's away and pretend that you forgot she was there and that you somehow forgot your pants (later if this backfires you can always use the perfectly believable excuse that you might be coming down with alzheimers.) Does she scream in fright and turn away? (Not a good sign) Or does she giggle and show interest? (You're gold)

You've got to be really sharp in your game if you're ever going to be gettin' any from your sweetheart. Just remember to play it cool. Don't jump the gun. And be ready for the unexpected. Keep a good stock of condoms, lube, batteries for the camera and/or vibrating toys, and viagra. You don't want to have to waste a perfect opportunity by spoiling the mood because you had run off on a last minute purchase. Have everything planned and ready to go. Keep your supplies in a designated place/container so you can grab it in a hurry. Be ready to have to deal with the inevitable, overwhelmingly negative reactions your behavior is going to cause (loss of family and public disgrace.)

Best of luck to you in your new conquest, Romeo. Keep us informed of the outcome.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009):

Dude are you serious? What do you mean what you think you should do? STAY AWAY FROM YOUR SON'S WIFE! I would think that since you're old enough to be a grandfather, no one should have to explain that to you. Get your own woman!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2009):

You are most likely very lonely and she is so approachable and friendly and I can see why you've fallen for her. This crush indicates that you must now start to date again and find a suitable partner. Take up dancing or some other class at your local Y or night school courses. You will be successful if you have confidence in yourself and realize the need to forget your inappropriate crush.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2009):

Keep quiet unless you want to unleash a crapstorm.

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A female reader, Accountable United Kingdom +, writes (8 October 2009):

Accountable agony auntIts a difficult situation you're in. Although I fully stand by that we cannot control who we love, I also firmly believe in self-restraint, and as I am not a believer in soulmates I don't believe she is the ONLY woman for you. Honestly the best thing to do in this situation is control your urges, for the good of your whole family. Try to move on, spend more time trying to meet other women - it sounds as though you have been lonely for a while and maybe you just want somebody, and she may be the woman you have the most contact with? In which case it would naturally follow that youd see her as a cure for your lonliness.

Thats my take on it at least - acting on your feelings will no doubt lead to disaster; please find another way to resolve your emotions. Good luck. :)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009):

"Know your son know that..." typo - should read "does your son know............."

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009):

Know your son know that he has an enemy in his home in the form of his father? The one person he believes he can trust with his wife, his kids, his life. Perverted thoughts you are having is just plain evil of you. You are lusting after your sons wife, the mother of your grandkids. Granddad, if you want to spend your golden years ALONE, in contempt then carry on in this vain. YOU WILL LOOSE EVERYTHING you hold dear to you. Without sounding morbid you may die a lonely old ma, without any family. Is this what you want. You may think i am going a bit extreme here but this is exactly what will happen of you try to divide this family. There is a code between parent and child isn’t there. Do not cross it. A code of honour , a code of respect and even a code of PROTECTING AND LOVING YOUR KIDS until death. A decent parent/father will do everything in his power not to cause harm to his son. If you cross the lines you will live to regret these actions. This is not a soap opera ;like the BB where Eric sleeps with his sons leftovers. This is real life. Real tragedy will happen. Real pain. Real betrayal and devastation. Do you want to see your grandkids suffer because of your sordid actions. Then steer clear from this FAMILY. Leave your daughter in law alone. Do not be despicable and tell your daughter in law anything. In fact she is a daughter to you and you are a father to her. See how sick this is?

If you are so desperate to have sex in your old age, then masturbate!

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A male reader, Heartbroken in love United States +, writes (8 October 2009):

simple answer. get over it. this is not best friends girl or even ur sister in law. this ur sons wife. and they have kids. do you value spending time with ur grandkids? this is not love this is lust. snap out of it.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (8 October 2009):

eyeswideopen agony auntYou need to get a grip Grandpa. Aren't you a little long in the tooth to be so out of control? Do you date? If not you should. Stay busy and keep focused.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009):

i'm curious- how old are you?

sons age and his wifes age?

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A male reader, briguyin United States +, writes (8 October 2009):

Sometimes people need to be told directly. I understand where you are coming from; however, you need to find someone else and quickly. I don't know how your relationship is with your son, but this would surely destroy it. Also, think about how this would play out... let's say you get what you want and end up with your sons wife. Now what are you to those kids, grandpa or step-dad? Messed up huh? If you value your son, daughter-in-law, and grandkids... you need to find someone else, get out there and date or whatever you need to do because this could only end very badly and it wouldn't just be your life that would get messed up.

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A female reader, Lola1 Canada +, writes (8 October 2009):

Lola1 agony auntOuch. Tough situation.

While I sympathize, you must never say anything to her. Essentially, you'd be putting your uncomfortable feelings on to her and she would then need to speak to her husband about them. You would not be welcome over anymore, or her husband would not believe her and that would create tension in their home.

Your grandkids deserve to have access to you and your son deserves for his father to stop lusting after his wife. If you DO love her, spare her your negative feelings (guilt, temptation, etc.).

Focus on getting past these feelings. Step one is to stop whatever behaviours are feeding them. For example, don't think about her when she is not around. You're a big boy; you can dot it. I understand that it will take discipline and strength in the beginning, but you can do it.

The best way to accomplish something is to "fake it until you make it". If you ACT as though there is no issue and that includes when they are not aruond you, then you will conquer the issue.

If your mind starts to go down an inappropriate path, start thinking about something else. Give yourself space from her, both physically and in your mind.

What is keeping you from dating? I suspect a lot of this longing stems from loneliness. While she may be special, she is not the only woman on this planet who has the qualities you enjoy. Get out there and find a woman for yourself.

Good luck.

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