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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I need your advice, im 17 and thinking about sleeping with my bf for the first time. the problem is im really embarressed as i have large labia minora's that hang down outside the lips of my vagina. Im really insecure about them and i dont know what to do, whether to talk to him? if so what do i say??? im so ashamed, please give me some advice:(
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, helen17  +, writes (20 January 2010):
i have to tell you that i had the same ''problem''.i couldn't even sleep thinkin of that,but it was just a waste of time,because when it happened he said completely NOTHING about that!please,don't let it ruin your mood...be happy!
A
male
reader, ukmale  +, writes (23 December 2008):
 Sweetheart you have nothing at all to be ashamed of. Women come in all shapes and sizes. For instance, no woman has two breasts the same size (at least not in my experience), it's just a fact of life. The only ones that seem to be the same are fake and look like ridiculous.
My last girlfriend had long, thick labia that were an absolute delight. It certainly didn't put me off; quite the contrary, it was the prettiest vagina I've ever seen in my life. Unfortunately, she could not accept love due to old family issues, otherwise I would've wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and that lovely vagina.
At seventeen we all have things we are insecure or self-conscious about; most of them no one else really notices except us. I know I did and in time I became comfortable in my own skin. I'm sure you will be too. There's no rush. At seventeen I wouldn't recommend anyone being in a sexual relationship for physical and emotional reasons.
I hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2008): I am at a loss to understand why women are so worried about having a large labia minora. There is nothing sexier than a woman who has a long labia minora hanging down past their labia majora. I love spending hours just swishing it around in my mouth.....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2008): yeah I worried about the sam thing.
But me and my bf were in the moment and we did it any ways.
I was scared he would say something..but he didn't..actually he loved having sex with me.
So honey its nothing to fret about.
[=
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2008): i have large labia and im still worried about them , but if your boyfriend truely loves you he wont care how it looks .
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A
male
reader, beenthereandunit +, writes (2 March 2007):
At your age it is natural to worry about your body. Remember he will be just as worried as you for any number of reasons, does he measure up in size and girth. Will he be able to satisfy you?, will he be able to stay the course or suffer from premature ejaculation?. The fact is your worrying over nothing. Womens vaginas come in varying shapes and sizes like mens penis's. If you can talk to your mum or an aunt or a neighbour. They will reassure you on this subject. I have to ask if you are so worried about this, then is it the right time for you or is it the right guy?. Do not sleep with some one because you feel pressured as you will not enjoy it. However if you feel as if you are ready to take your relationship further then relax, take your time and enjoy it. ps, remember to take precautions
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2007): You are lucky because you have the thing all men will like to fuck. When I read your question my cock started to pump because I crave women with larger pussy and long inner lips. Do me a favour let me fucky you at least thia once!
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A
female
reader, lola manola +, writes (4 February 2007):
 think about it, penises are the most disgusting looking thing ever invented, be glad uve not got one of those!! dont stress, porn stars are to blame for this insecurity, boys dont care, fanny is fanny at the end of the day (if ure american i apologise fanny in the uk means ure vagina)
he wont even notice sweety! have lots of fun, and sorry to be boring but be safe! xxxxxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2007): Hi dont be embarrassed. Long labia are to be proud of. Mine are over 2" long and I try to extend them because they are unusual and very beautiful. Try to relax and look at yourself in a mirror. I am sure that your boyfriend will also appreciate a close up view. Open your legs wide with your knees bent and massage some lavender oil onto your lips just before your boyfriend arrives and then invite him to explore you
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2007): hi i dont know if this will help but i also felt very insecure and still do as i have large lips aswell, but believe me he wont despise you for it infact its a luxury to men my bf loves them, hope i helped! and be proud to flaunt them!
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A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (5 January 2007):
 You don't have anything to be ashamed about hun. He won't notice anything about it anyway. When we are self conscious about something, that is the only thing we see when we look in the mirror and feel ugly because of it. You feel that they are extremely large, because you think they are.
My ex had the same 'problem'. She always commented on hers and felt the same way as you do. I have never saw them as being large or anything.
The more you realise that it is normal, the smaller they will seem to you. It is only YOUR insecurity that is the problem. Chances are, he wont even care what it looks like.
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A
female
reader, rammsteinfan  +, writes (5 January 2007):
 You don't have anything to worry about. He will like what he sees, especially if it's part of you! So don't worry, be happy!! :D
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A
female
reader, Granny +, writes (4 January 2007):
 You are confusing the labia minora with the labia majora. The majora are supposed to be big and hanging outside the body to protect the entrances to the urethra, vagina and the clitoris - they keep bacteria out. The minora are much smaller and further in and second-line defense of the vagina. The bearded clam joke is actually biologically true. You are perfectly normal. If you are really horny you will open up like a flower.
Anyway, if you let him go that far, your labia will be the last thing on his mind! Enjoy!
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A
female
reader, Lilly223 +, writes (4 January 2007):
 You don't say how far it hangs down, but unless it is INCHES (meaning MORE than one...no stretching!) I would not be alarmed at all. What you consider a problem is not really a problem at all. This is normal... every womans "parts" look different. It may appear to be abnormal to you now because when you were a little girl your labia did not look like this. It is a part of maturing. Trust me on this one okay? If you've seen pictures or anything like that and there wasn't anything peeking out, it was probably tucked it for photo purposes. If you still are not reassured, the next time you go to your gyno ask if it is 'normal'. I would be willing to bet, he/she will say perfectly normal, don't worry about it. Can I say this is normal anymore? :) If you feel self conscious about it, tuck it in alittle so it doesn't peak out, by the time your boyfriend has a chance to notice... which is highly unlikely that he will.. he won't care anyway. Girl 'parts' are just like guy "parts" , none of them look the same, they are all unique in thier own special way.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (4 January 2007):
 Ah yes, the bearded clam. LOL.
Don't sweat it. He'll be so tickled to see you naked, he won't care if you have a wooden leg.
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A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (4 January 2007):
 This is one of those things that we think is really horrendous when we look at our own body but in the real world, nobody notices, I'm sure! This guy should love you, if you're going to sleep with him, and he won't notice these things. He's probably just as insecure about something on his body, we all are!
All vagina's a different, don't get so hung up on how it looks, they're all pretty ugly really, aren't they? But guys don't think so and if he's worth your time, he'll treat you with respect and love your whole body.
Please stop worrying about this as you will ruin the first time with this guy and you will regret this in the future. Good luck and chill out.
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