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I'm trying to pluck up the courage to leave my husband...

Tagged as: Marriage problems, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 July 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 8 July 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, *edupmommyoftwo writes:

I am trying to pluck up the courage to leave my husband. Can someone help me boost my confidence? All we do is argue and it's all the cause of him this is sad to say but my heart no longer feels the love for him because he treats me badly he calls me names and tells me i am not good sexually or at performing oral sex. Should a man tell his wife that? even though i can't stand oral sex i do it just to please his needs and he tells me i am no good at it... shouldn't he accept the effort and be happy with that he makes me feel so bad.

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A female reader, fedupmommyoftwo United States +, writes (8 July 2010):

fedupmommyoftwo is verified as being by the original poster of the question

No I can't really talk to my family because then it just get out of control I've already tried that to be honest he's just being a jerk and knows that when he says things like that it will hurt me and make me cry that is what he aims for he always says things so harshly to hurt others feeling I thought I would be different considering that I am the woman he married and promised to love honor cherish and obey for the rest of his life it's so funny because he is a Rastafarian and says those vows are according the bible that he doesn't believe in he wasn't always a Rastafarian when i met him he was an American boy which he is he was born here it wasn't til he started hanging out with a friend that he knew for years which is a Jamaican since he has Jamaican decent he feels like he can change

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2010):

Well, he should be. But as I'm sure you're aware, he's not really that great a guy. Talk to a friend and tell them how you feel so you have someone there ready to back you up. Maybe you'll have a bit more courage if you know there is someone who will be there for you afterwards. You do need to leave this guy really.

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A female reader, Pinkpies United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2010):

You are very young, how long have you been marries?

No, no one should say horrible things about they're partner in bed (a better way is to give them tips, and tell them what feels good, not what feels bad)

Do you have family members or friends who can help you put the situation into perspective?

Have you tried having a break from each other? This can help you make your mind up sometimes.

And also sitting down and having a big chat together about how you can both work to make things better.

:)

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