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I'm tired of being the one who always tries to make the relationship work

Tagged as: Faded love<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 December 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 5 December 2011)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid

I am with my bf for nearly 2 years.Only during the start he used to call me, nowadays im the one who is always calling/trying to meet him. He never even tries. If i stop calling even for a week, he wont bother much. I dont want to do this anymore even though i love him.

Is there anyway i can save this relationship, i am tired of being the one who is always trying work out this relationship. I know that he is not cheating.

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A female reader, chocoholicforever United States +, writes (5 December 2011):

Have you talked with him about this? Maybe he assumes that you want to be the one to always call him and initiate stuff, because that's what you always do. I mean, you have been doing it. So unless you've voiced to him that you're unhappy about this, he has no way to know that this isn't exactly what you want the relationship to be like. in other words, if you're not happy with the way things are being done, you should voice your concerns not keep them in and simply experiment with changing your behavior for a week hoping he will read your mind and respond in the correct way, and then drawing conclusions from whatever happens.

assuming that you have in fact told him that you're not happy with this and he still doesn't make an effort. Then I think this is a sign that this relationship has tanked and it's time for you to move on.

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A female reader, confusedfemale92 United States +, writes (5 December 2011):

Yep, i personally think u should find yourself a real man!

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (5 December 2011):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntOne-way "relationships" really aren't worth it. Give him up and get a REAL boyfriend....

Good luck...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2011):

When is laziness a loving trait? I'm thinking he doesn't feel he has to do anything because you do it all for him. So its a form of laziness but also emotionally abusive. He just doesn't care enough to put forth the effort.

Why stay with someone who can be like this towards you?

Sometimes you can't 'fix' someone. He should KNOW love and treat others, especially your GF, as you would like to be treated.

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