A
female
age
36-40,
*readStudPoet-DC
writes:Where to start, ok. Long story short i became very close to a bartender at my regular bar and things went from there. Im a very flirtacious lesbian, i am of the "dominate" persuasion so its very apparent that i am gay. i flirt alot of females str8 or gay and dont usually think much of it. She and I became very close from the interactions we would have at the bar when she was working. She asked me for my phone number and we began talking and texting ALL the time almost instantly. She was from down south and had only been in the area for a couple of months and hadnt seen any of the touristy stuff yet, so since i was born and raised in dc decided that i would give her a personal tour. we went from museum to museum monument to monument all day we laughed we flirted we had awkward touches and krazy romantic eye stares from across the room, the whole movie love moment type cliched moment. basically we started being more serious, kissing and eventually sex and it led to a relationship, she was raised in a very religious household like myself but unlike myself couldnt lie to her family about her newfound sexuality, that instantly led to problems. After about 4 months the relationship ended in a very quick 3 min convo and all contact ended. I moved to california stayed for 6 months and because of sickness in the family had to move back home. still no contact, did i mention i was head over heels in love with her. and she said she felt the same. so one day i get a message on facebook from her saying how she stills loves me feels horrible bout things ended with us and didnt plan on me responding but wanted me 2 know she wanted me back in her life. So here we are 1 month after the message and back almost to where we left off. our personalities, likes, dislikes, and thinking is so much alike that we picked up basically where we left off, however we have only kissed once and at the demand of my friends have not had sex or said anything about a relationship right now but talk of it as it is destined to happen, and i dont know what to do. yes i still love her(and if you were thinking shes like my 1st and i dont know what love is, i do i was never a strong commitment type and have plenty of females) and she says she loves me. I dont trust easily at all but with her my guards are down but what if this is just a phase? im scared that she is just lonely and needs someone to feel the time and is using me or that she just wants sex and then will be gone again and i need help deciding what to do? if any one has been in this relationship before or could offer any advice or what you would do, Thanks in advancePoet
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2009): I'm a straight female but I know exactly how you feel. Seven months ago I met a guy who is several years younger than me, and he is blind. When we met, he told me that he had tried dating websites but no-one wanted to know and were put off by his blindness. A couple just never bothered to turn up. He also liked a couple of girls from his church but they also didn't want to know. He was also still a virgin, and he desperately wanted to meet someone.
After we met a couple of times, he kept saying he loved me etc. A friend of mine (who can be a bitch) found his e-mail address in my book and took it upon herself to contact him and introduce herself as a prospective date. To be honest, he took the bait, answered her, asked for her phone number etc.
She told me and forwarded his e-mails to me and I dumped him, telling him what had happened. The next thing was he was e-mailing, phoning me, sending me letters, even gifts, begging me to come back and he'd realised (conveniently) that he loves me.
I have seen him a few times, but much more casually on my part. I also feel that he only wants me because I'm the only one who's given him a chance. He says that's not true as he can always go back on the dating websites, but what would be different? Women still won't want to know!There is only me and consequently I don't believe him or trust him.
A
female
reader, DreadStudPoet-DC +, writes (23 June 2009):
DreadStudPoet-DC is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni agree. i guess it would hurt more to later think about this and wish i had seen where i couldve gone. it sjust what if i miss that person im supposed to be with while im wasteing time figuring out what we are gonna do
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2009): getting hurt is painful. i fully understand your fears especially as she's hurt you once already. I came out of a 4 year relationship at christmas. I Miss my girl badly and wish daily to have her back. No-one has ever hurt me like she did. But i'd take a chance on her again to feel the happiness again. Go for it mate we only live once. Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2009): Relationships are always a risk and it's better when you love someone to take the risk than not love at all. You may get hurt and you may not but to avoid it all together would be the biggest hurt of all. Don't run from love just because it carries no guarantees, it never will. It could be a phase or it could be the real thing but don't you want to find out? You may look back on the experience 20 yrs from now with a smile on your face at the memories or you may be holding her hand and talking about them together. From one woman to another, thats my advice.
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