Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Traycie  +, writes (13 July 2010):
Tell somebody you trust about what happened and go see a counselor if that will help you too im sorry you were put in that situation
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso i told my best guy friend he is very supportive and knows i would lie about such a thing i feel a little better now that at least one other person knows.
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male
reader, thereyago +, writes (12 July 2010):
I joined to add something that I am surprised no one mentioned. Next time you find yourself in a situation like this SCREAM! LOUD! and fight/ flee to safety.
Do not let fear paralyse you. From my understanding one of the primary lessons of women's self defense is teaching women to fight. An added bonus is that there would be no doubt about who's fault and who's word.
It also takes care of any memory tricks by confronting it on the spot.
Just to review, even though your reaction is normal and understandable, you should stay away from him and not put yourself in a vulnerable spot around him (or any other person you do not trust for that matter) And in the future confront loudly to pull in support and fight and flee immedietely. Freezing and being passive only encourages predators.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2010): I can't believe no one said this so I will. Next time that happens and there are other people around SCREAM! LOUD! and fight him. Staying quiet and not fighting because of fear is a sure recipe for rape. Most of womens self defense is teaching them to fight and protest in the first place.
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male
reader, Reaper94  +, writes (11 July 2010):
Refuse to set foot in your friends house again, when she asks you why, say what happened, it's probably the best way to prove to her it happened. Unless he left a hizz stain on the floor, which would probably help your argument out - If she knows you fell asleep on the couch and theres a semen stain right next to it..
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male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (10 July 2010):
 hmmm wow this is hard even f you tell theres a chance no one would believe you... you could be alienated from your frends and family... n theory you should tell he groped you basically from what it sounds like... but even if you tell it would be your word against his.. legally you couldnt prove he did anything... your friend will probably take her brothers side over yours... i suggest keeping mum and never going over there again...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2010): You should tell someone you trust. Why should you remain in fear when it is him that is being out of order.
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female
reader, xanthic +, writes (9 July 2010):
 Tell your mother, or another trusted adult. He might be doing the same thing to other young girls, or will in the future.
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female
reader, cindy 15 +, writes (9 July 2010):
 im so sorry this happened to you and im going to be honest i also had a little bit of a similar expierence a few years ago i also never told anyone and it is terrible to bottle up inside and it haunts u but u need to tell some one your mum for example and take the stress of your shoulders. and what i done when it happened to me i didnt know how to react towards him ( i was 13 he was 16 ) i didnt know what to say or do and i avoided him and didnt go to his house again in my own expierience id say stay away from this guy as much as you can if u didnt "WAKE UP" imagine what could of happened.
i hope this helped be strong and hope you feel better! tell some one! luck
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female
reader, foxy_bb  +, writes (9 July 2010):
hi there! first of all im really sorry that you had to go through that, its not nice at all. but you have to tell someone about this. i know you are really scared right now but you need to tell someone. i may seem like the hardest thing you have had to do in your life, but once someone else knows you will find that you can cope better with what you have been through. your friends brother might be doing this to other girls as well so it is important that you tell your parents and then maybe they can help you to tell your friends parents. whatever you may think, it is NOT your fault! i know that this is hard and that you are scared (i was molested by my moms bf for 3 years before i finally told someone. i wish i had the first time), but you will get through this. let us know how it went? best wishes. xox
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2010): tell someone and confront him! that's totally unaceptable! tell him that if he ever does it again you'll report him and keep your word! talk to an adult because you dont want to suffer any ill effects
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female
reader, tss18 +, writes (9 July 2010):
 im so sorry this happened to you. im sure it was scary. maybe you should talk to your mom about it. i know that would be hard but that could have turned into rape. and if your afraid to stay there , then you definetly shouldnt he could try to take it farther next time. if talking to your mom is out of the question you could try a school counselor or your friend but she may not believe you and that could cause more problems, just avoid going over there all night. i hope your ok. goodluck.
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