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I'm really shy when talking to guys, how can I be more outgoing and talk to them easier?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 February 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 24 February 2007)
A male Australia age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hey All,

I'm quite shy when meeting, or wanting to meet new people. My problem is that I don't know what to talk about.

I'm fine when I know a bit about the person and I have some idea of what they're interested in, but when it comes to the initial part of a conversation I flunk. Once I get past the hello stage, I have no idea what to say. I know to talk about movies and current affairs and all that, I just don't know how to put it all together.

Plus I'm self-conscious which makes it harder. Has anyone got any advice on how to overcome this problem? Basically I would like to become outgoing, witty, funny and charismatic...

View related questions: affair, shy

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A female reader, playette United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2007):

hi i had the same problem but all you need to do is relax and have a fun when you are with people you dont really know. ask them what they are intrested in and what they have been up to and if it makes it easier have a drink before hand lol

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2007):

AskEve agony auntYou have no confidence and very low self esteem but you can get it back, just believe and assert yourself more. Here are two links that will help you to do this.

http://www.wikihow.com/Build-Self-Confidence

http://www.more-selfesteem.com/self_esteem.htm

Read over them, they'll help you. Here are a few questions you can ask a girl when you're interested in her. Remember, you don't have to do ALL the talking, as time goes on she'll ask you questions too and the conversation will just flow automatically. Okay, here are some examples of what you can ask her -

1. What do you like to do when you're not working?

2. Where in the world would you most like to visit?

3. Are you interested in sport at all... if so what sport?

4. What do you look for in your ideal partner?

5. What really turns you off?

6. What really turns you ON!

7. Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now?

8. (Apart from me...) are you an animal lover?

9. What is your favourite food?

10. Are you close to your family?

11. What is the first thing you look at in a man?

12. Where do you go to socialise?

13. What's your favourite drink?

14. What's your favourite meal?

15. Where would you choose to go on that ideal date?

16. Are you a morning or a night time person?

17. Do you like to entertain and give parties?

18. What's your dream car?

19. Do you like to keep up to date with the news and current affairs?

20. Would you like to see me again

Eve

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A male reader, si101 United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2007):

si101 agony auntgud day mate this is only an example but you say you can talk about movies example remember lol talk about james bond movies then ask about what car was that in the movie im sore most blokes will know about cars or ask them if they have seen eny new movies and ask them if its good or not even if you have seen it yourself or what type of film there into that should open them up a bit and you can see what kind of person they are is you could comment on the dress sense and if you bring another can of fosters over im gonna flip bloody stuff lol :)

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