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I'm pregant and want an abortion, but I'm scared to tell my boyfriend

Tagged as: Dating, Pregnancy<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 May 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 30 May 2009)
A female United States age 18-21, anonymous writes:

Im 19 years old and took a pregnancy test and it was positive. im not ready to have this child nor would my boyfriend but i just found out 2 days ago and not sure when or how to bring it up let alone tell him.

what should i do? I am scared that if i talk to him about it and about getting the abortion, he will break up with me. I'm so scared about this cause i love him so much and he loves me.

I used birth control, took it everyday and got unlucky i guess. does anyone have a solution?

View related questions: abortion, pregnancy test

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A female reader, SugarCookie United States +, writes (30 May 2009):

I think that if he loves you and he is not ready to have a baby he wont break up with you over this information. The only way he will end things is if he finds abortion wrong and you still get one, which sadly I would agree with him. I realize it is your body and you would have to be the one to deal with the pregnancy, but it is his baby too. I think that you have to tell him and express how you feel, but what you also have to consider is if he too will want this baby. Infact if he wants this baby you really need to consider having the baby and giving him the rights to it.

( I feel I must say I am anti-abortion and think that if someone wants this child it should have a chance).

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009):

You say he loves you, yet you are scared if you tell him he will dump you? That's not love. It takes two people to make a baby and if he dumps you over this it only shows he's not ready to take responsibility for his actions. He may very well break up with you for it, but if he does then trust me hon, he's not the kind of guy worth chasing after.

You need to tell him, as much to get his input as to see if he's someone worth loving and keeping around. Good luck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009):

Oh boy, he is partly responsible and needs to chip in financially for it. If he breaks up with you because of this, he's not worth your time in the first place. Yeah, you were on the pill but anytime two people engage in sexual activity, they both know there is a slight chance of becoming pregnant so this is not something you did all on your own.

It's concerning that you'd do anything to not lose him at your own expense. That's not healthy. Not letting him know out of fear he will break up with you is to continue a relationship with someone that deep down you don't feel loves you and it's not even giving him a chance to show you he does by supporting you in this.

You may find out that love wasn't really there for him but better to find out now than live a pretend relationship and keep hiding major events in your life for fear he'll go away.

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