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I'm nervous about doing sexual things with a more experienced guy!

Tagged as: Friends with Benefits<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 December 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 4 December 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I've been talking to this guy for a few months and we've recently told each other we like each other.

We were playing the question game and he asked me if i'd like to try being friends with benefits, however:

- i've never had a boyfriend

- i've never had a proper kiss

- i've never done anything sexual with a guy

but i really like this guy and i feel like i'm ready to do everything but lose my virginity.

I'm just really nervous about experiencing sexual things for the first time, as he has done pretty much everything before.

Any help/tips/advice? It would be much appreciated

View related questions: friend with benefits, never had a boyfriend

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (4 December 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntDO NOT DO this FWB thing. NOT with this boy.

I personally think that FWB is only to be for older divorced people who know what they want and what is missing.

TEENS and singles do NOT need FWB... (no one NEEDS it)

you are young

you are in-experienced.... do not let some cute boy you have a crush on take your innocence away.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2012):

It would be a more comfortable and relaxing experience to start out with someone in the same boat as yourself. In my opinion you would find it hard to get a guy who is more experienced sexually than you who also has respect for how you feel about your lack of knowledge about sexual activities.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2012):

Miamine agony auntYou like him.. he likes sex

Guys that like you usually want to be your boyfriend

Guys that want sex want a FWB and are only interested in your body.

I've read the fairy tales, I've seen the movie.. never did prince charming say.. "hey your nice, can I just screw you".

Wait for a proper boyfriend, who likes you enough to actually take you dating and introduce you as his girlfriend.

Friends with benefits, they have sex with you, put on their clothes, go boast and laugh with all of their mates about you, and then go find themselves a proper girlfriend who they respect.

Not worth it.. Avoid this guy or stay friends WITHOUT sex.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (3 December 2012):

N91 agony auntWooooooooaaaaaahhhhhh, hold on just one minute. Do not even consider getting into a FWB at your age! I can 1000000000% guarentee that you will end up very hurt from it.

Listen from my personal experience when I feel head over heels for a girl who just wanted sex. My head has never been in a place like it, i couldn't concentrate or think straight for about 3 months until I got over her, it was absolutely horrible. Especially when you have things like college or school to deal with, developing feelings and having your head mashed up isnt realt what you need right now.

You may say that sex is what you want, but feelings will develop and either of you will end up hurt, it is just what happens in this situation

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (3 December 2012):

aunt honesty agony auntI would strongly recommend to you that you do not go down this path. Experiencing a physical relationship for the first time should be something special and something you enjoy with someone who you are committed to. Having a friends with benefits deal with someone when you are still inexperienced is a bad idea as you will more than likely want more and you will get hurt. I know you feel you like this guy, but if he liked you in return then he would be offering a commitment but he is not he is just looking for sex. But at least he is being honest with you. My advice would be to save yourself for someone who wants more than a physical relationship.

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