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I'm in love with my soon-to-be step-brother!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Love stories, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 July 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 6 July 2008)
A female age 36-40, anonymous writes:

My Mom will be getting married to this guy in March of 09. I really like my "soon to be step brother". I think I might be in love with him.

I am 13 and my step brother is 14. I REALLY REALLY like him, A LOT. I don't know what to do. I know there's nothing wrong with dating a step sibling, but I am just confused. He's done little things before, he's let me lay my head on his shoulder while he rests his head on my head and plays with and smells my hair. hes played footsie with me before, rubbed my head, sort of held my hand before, put his arm around me.

Lately he stopped doing it as much as he used to. I'm just confused and I don't know what to do! I'm afraid of getting my heart broken and a lot of other things.

HELP ME WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!??

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008):

I think maybe you should talk to your stepbrother first about this, and see if he feels the same way about you. Be completely honest with him, tell him you are in love with him and you want to pursue a relationship with him. There is nothing wrong with that, because you are not related by blood. So having a relationship with him would not be incest.

I would not tell your mom or stepdad about it, cuz your realtionship with him might not last. I say do what you feel is right, and go with your feelings. Things may change over time and you may not end up with him forever. So you will have to see each other secretly. If you have sex, be sure and use birth control!!! If you get pregnant with his baby, that could really complicate things. So before you have sex with him, insist that he use a condom, and see if you can get birth control pills from either your doctor or a school health clinic.

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A female reader, ?sex?new?boi? United States +, writes (5 July 2008):

dont fool around with him and if u cant get him off ur mind then tell ur mom about it cuz then maby she can help but tell her u liked him b4 they got together or b4 u knew who se was getting married to i hope i helped and i wish u the best of luck

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2008):

lexilou agony auntIts not illegal but given the fact that you are both so young then you may need to decide to wait until your are both older before you officially date. The main reason for this is that relationships at such a young age rarely last and if you two end up fighting and hating each other it will be very difficult for his dad and your mum as they will have a lot of pressure on their marriage caused by you two.

So enjoy his company, dont do anything silly like allowing things to progress to sex and explain to him that you do like him but feel you are both too young if he asks you to be his girlfriend or trys anything. In a few years you may still like each other and want to date then but tell your parents first dont hide it. x

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A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (5 July 2008):

LazyGuy agony auntI would talk about it with your mother and get some legal advice.

I am not certain that it is NOT illegal to be intimate with a stepbrother. Depends on whether you are mutually adopted perhaps. If you become brother and sister legally then from then on a romantic relationship is illegal.

If you two just happen to be the childeren of two married people, then I don't know.

You are still very young and feelings can come and go at your age and you might just be in love with your new brother but mistake sibling like affection for love.

But I would definitly talk it over because IF this runs deeper then perhaps some action needs to be taken now. If there are shared romantic feelings make sure that the law won't get in the way.

There might be ways around you two becoming siblings in the eye of the law.

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A female reader, jdee United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2008):

jdee agony aunthi

that sounds really confusing. why dont you talk to your mom about it? or if you feel you cant, why not ask your soon to be step brother how he feels about you two becoming step brothr and sister see if his reaction is a little sad or if its very positive to becoming your step brother i think you know theres nothing that can be done and will have to get other your crush.

good luck x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008):

he is probably feeling confused just like you

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