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I'm in love with my classmate! Should I ask her out on a date then confess my feelings? Or text her my feelings right after exams?

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Question - (17 August 2013) 2 Answers - (Newest, 17 August 2013)
A male Malaysia age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I need help... I think I've fallen in love with my classmate after a texting her a month ago. At first, everything started fine and normal, I always treated her as a classmate and friend. But my feelings builds up when we texting each other more frequently.

In school, we chatted more than before and I stick around her more than my friends now. I also notice I have this tendency of looking at her all the time. Then, missing her when school is over. At home, I couldn't concentrate on my schoolwork and my favorite activity, gaming. All in my head now, is about her!

I am certain that I want her to be part of life. The question now is how should I approach this? I am willing to confess to her, on the other hand I mainly fear rejection. Because I got a feeling she is now treating me as a friend. I don't know whether we could work out or not and now, both of us are having exams for the next 2 weeks. I don't feel like bothering her or disturb her.

I need a plan or a guide on how should I do. Should I ask her out on a date then confess my feelings? Or text her my feelings right after exams? I have never feel so uneasy and restless before. Haiis... Sorry, I am inexperience.

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (17 August 2013):

"Confessing your feelings" is usually a pretty bad idea this early. It very well could scare her off if she isn't on the same page as you. The best thing to do would be to ask her to do things outside of school.

Build a relationship with her, then, if you decide to "confess", do it when you're sure she's interested.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (17 August 2013):

kenny agony auntIt sounds like you really like her, I can relate to the feelings you are having. I think the worst thing you can do is to rush things and risk scaring her off. A couple of months ago I met a girl in a class that I do, one day after we got chatting. Then after the next one we chatted some more, after each class we learnt abit more about each other. Then after a while it materialised into a drink after, then something to eat, then the other night we kissed for the first time and are arranging to do something later tonight.

The point im trying to make is getting to know someone and building a raport is a gradual process that takes time. When you see her, be joyous, happy around her, make her laugh, be someone she goes home and thinks to herself I really like that guy. Don't confess your feeling's to her, at this stage it could make her run. Just go with the flow and don't push things, take your time and let things materialise naturally.

Hope it goes well for you

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