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I'm getting mixed signals from him, after giving him signs I like him. I don't want to waste my time, what do I do?

Tagged as: Crushes, Online dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 March 2016) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 March 2016)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

About a month ago I met this guy at a conference. He was in my committee and he was very friendly, we ended up hanging out for four days. He was really friendly, a little touchy, always wanted to seat next to me. Basically there were little signs and then only when he hugged me on the last day did I realise he liked me.

I added him on Facebook to keep in touch. And since that day we've spoken on Facebook for hours at a time online.

When we initially started speaking he made a few sexual jokes but I kinda ignored them or faked lack of understanding. Our convos were often humorious or quite deep and he confided to me about a lot of personal issues which i was open and responsive too.

He mentioned one of my friends a few times and I asked if he wanted me to help set them up, he immediately said no, if when I said I didn't mind, saying she wasn't his type. The he basically described his type as being me.

Furtherdown the convo he them said he HAD a crush on me when we first met and that now we're friends it's chill and he doesn't want it to awkward. So I just said I knew he did and then changed the convo. He also asked before this how far had I gotten with a guy and what was my type.

Later down the convo I felt bad to the way I responded and said that his crush gave me a crush and he simply said that's adorable, I felt so exposed and was like is that all u can say. He then got uncomfortable, he went offline, then came back online saying the weather put him in a bad mood.

We then moved on a continued for the next couple of days talking about something else.

Later on I was giving a hypothetical about accidentally touching people's hands and pulling away immediately and he got all upset about me saying I would pull away my hand immediately. I apologised saying that I didn't mean I would pull away from him, but he was just super sensitive about it.

Still we continued talking about other good stuff and moved on from that mini-spat.

I was in a bad mood yesterday and he tried to comfort me and then we were just talking about random stuff when he said we should totally get a coffee after school soon as he wanted to get me hooked on it. I said why not?

Literally ten minutes after, he told me the friend I had offered to set him up with had drunk texted him hitting on him. He then asked me if it was weird that he thought she was cute (having said a week prior she wasn't his type). All I could was say was yes that she was a babe. But she knows I like him and I showed her convos between us. So her drunk texting him is awkward.

I just feel confused, does he like me or not?

I have really have given him some signs and commments I like him and now I'm confused if he likes me. If he doesn't I don't want to waste energy.

I'm kinda upset about the girl too. What should I do.

View related questions: crush, drunk, facebook, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2016):

He's slightly younger than me, which is why I was apprehensive at first.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (7 March 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntIt sounds to me like you where both playing games with each other, he told you he liked you, but you asked him did he want you to set him up with your friend, so he probably took this as you are not interested. I am not sure if he is playing a game between you both and wanting to make you jealous, or maybe he was just looking for some fun with you and that is why he asked such sexual questions to begin with. Is his guy the same age as you or older?

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada +, writes (6 March 2016):

janniepeg agony auntYou both showed some signs of liking each other, but not enough to actually date and disrupt the existing friendship. You weren't interested in him initially maybe that's why you set him up with another girl. Then you warmed up to each other and got confused because you didn't just go for it the first time.

When in situations like this, I suggest taking the plunge because down the road you may meet some other guy while still having lingering feelings for your friend. Not wanting a friendship to go awkward is such a coward way to deal with things and it also stops you from getting a wholesome relationship in which you don't get distracted by having to give or receive attention from someone else.

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