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I'm gay and my friend says he's straight, so why does he let me do things with him?

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 November 2007) 10 Answers - (Newest, 18 March 2011)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I am gay and my friend says he is not but he lets me do something to him. is he in denial or straight guys do that?

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A male reader, JamieP 123 United Kingdom +, writes (18 March 2011):

Maybe he has fellings for u and just play around

to see where things go

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A male reader, str8tapper United States +, writes (11 July 2009):

This is what happens to a lot of girls to. First let me say this. If I guy lets you do stuff to him it doest mean he likes you sexually. Even if you are girl. You dont have to be attracted to a person to ALLOW someone to do something to you when you are horny. Now if this guy was chasing you can begging you please, then he is sexually turned on by you and you access his sexuality from there.

It also means that he trusts you not to go blabbing it around and that you are really good at what you do. The body likes to be touched becasue we have nerves. The body doesn't have repulstion to pleasure becuase of gender.....only the brain does that.

Yes many straight guys would never let guys touch them, but this isnt becuase they are straight. Being straight only means you are oriented/sexually attracted to women. It doesnt mean you are repulsed by men. That is a completely diffent issue. Just as not all guys like anal sex, not all straight guys rejects boys.

He might be in denail. Many guys do this also but look it doesnt really matter in the long run. This guy knows in his mind and heart what he likes, but if he is allowing you to do it and you like then whats the big deal. Say he came out and said he was gay. What would it change?

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A male reader, onfire911 United States +, writes (11 March 2009):

i have been involved with a lot of so called straight guys. i am a bisexual male by the way. i love so called straight guys and i guess that as along as u get to have fun with them thats all that matters huh? don't worry,just have fun baby.

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A female reader, Mushgirl United Kingdom +, writes (23 November 2007):

Mushgirl agony auntI think it's either what the first poster said, it's just a case of him being so horny he'll do anything, or he's curious... or maybe he is gay. Mind you, my best friend (a girl) is bisexual and as far as I know I'm straight, and we ended up sleeping on a sofa together kissing with tongues... but I dunno what that was about. I think it was just curiousity on my part (and she came on to me, I wouldn't lead her on or anything). So maybe he is just curious. I'd say if you're giving him oral, it's probably that he's just horny. If it's him fondling you, then he's probably gay. If it's you fondling him, he's probably curious. If it's full-on sex, I'd say he's not in denial, he's gay and admitting it to himself, if not to you.

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A male reader, aim Philippines +, writes (19 November 2007):

aim agony auntThere are a lot of possibilities in confronting this issue.

It can be that he is curious how different it is with a man than a woman. Or he's THAT horny to take on men too (given that he is indeed straight). Probably he is bi and trying to understand more his sexuality. And yes, there are just straight men who are in fact just curious about gay sex or foreplay. And maybe more reasons.

But really, you have to stop doing it with him since it will not end nicely.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2007):

He's just horney and desperate enough to where he can't get a woman, so he lets you do things to him. I bet he doesn't reciprocate, am I right? He's using you. I suggest you cut off contact with him immediately as he is going to regret this in the future and feel great shame and hate you for doing it. Probably when he gets a girlfriend. And you are just being taken advantage of. I am not trying to say that gay people are or should be shameful. I know a few straight men who have let gay men do things to them and ended up regretting it more than anything in the future. This is why I say stop doing it now.

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A female reader, pgissyd United Kingdom +, writes (17 November 2007):

pgissyd agony auntWell this kind of depends on what it is he lets you do. Some guys your age can be curious. I would have a serious heart to heart with him. If he insists he is straight then leave him alone sexually ok. Otherwise you may find you are making him uncomfortable and putting him in a situation he doesnt know how to get out of.

I firmly believe there is someone out there for everyone, so keep looking and one day you will find someone perfect for you xxxx

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A female reader, XxPrincessxLxX United Kingdom +, writes (17 November 2007):

XxPrincessxLxX agony auntheyy sweetie,

do u watch hollyoaks?...the same thign happend with a gay guy and his friend... i personally think he is in denial or maybe he just doesnt know how to come out...or he may be bisexual...try and have a talk with him and find out if he does have feelings for you becuase if you have strong feelings for him and you find out he doesnt feel the same back you might end up gertting hurt.

i hope i have helpt a bit hun

xxxx

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A male reader, nwsflash United Kingdom +, writes (17 November 2007):

nwsflash agony auntYour friend could be bi i'm guessing, or could be just a curious about things.

But you need to be careful because friendships can be lost very easy when you cross lines.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2007):

Wow. I am curious to know too. I have actually always wondered about that. Just because I have heard stories about "straight" guys being down with just about anything. So sometimes I wonder if this applies to most guys if they are horny enough.

I would guess, however, that he has a skewed perception of his sexual orientation. I don't believe that genuinely straight guys are down with that. I don't know though. I mean gay guys seem to be so much more honest about their sexuality then straight people are. In terms of everything.

Well just out of curiosity, would you let a GIRL go down on you??

If absolutely not, then I guess you have your answer. I'd still like to know what you think if you could answer back.

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