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I'm gay and I love my straight best friend!

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 April 2010) 11 Answers - (Newest, 22 February 2011)
A male United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

i'm gay and i love my straight best friend, but he doesn't treat me like that. i always give him clues that i love him but he reacts negatively or doesn't react at all. even my classmates are noticing it but i think he treats me like i don't exist and we all think that he is just using me (like asking me favors bec. he knows that i can't say no to him), but i still love him. i want him to be happy with me. its going to be difficult because he already like a girl. what should i do?

p.s. i don't care if he doesn't want to make love with me

i just want him to be with me and do everything to

please him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2011):

Im in the exact same situation. Im in love with my straight best friend (or at least have a GIANT crush on her) and shes giving me mixed signals...ive been giving her hints but she doesnt freak out. Anyways...So he has a crush on a girl, huh? Ow. That must hurt bud im sorry :( but you will find a great guy whos GAY, someone you'll have a better chance of getting with :) you sound like a nice guy; you will find someone perfect , i promise. Hang in there, in time you will either hook up or move on ;)

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A male reader, remixedremaderemodeled United States +, writes (9 November 2010):

remixedremaderemodeled agony auntWhat gay man hasn't gone through this before..I went through it myself and it sucks...I know how you feel about him. Hell I was you I had a crush on my best friend for about 3 years and in the end he used me just like how your friend uses you right now..it was at that point when I saw his true nature and realized he didn't care about anything but himself..all the sacrifices you make for him,the stuff you buy for him whatever you do it won't change him.. You are better off finding another friend who is worthy of your friendship and who knows maybe the new one will be gay..if not give up you will find someone.. Until then good luck and take care..

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2010):

Look I am going through the same situation me and my best friend are really close and I do very thing I can for him. he is also stright but he already knows I am gay, and doesent care he is really cool with it. So I told him, and he wasent wierded out. Now me and him are going to take it slow.

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A male reader, RaPhiCK Philippines +, writes (29 May 2010):

then maybe you have to tell him frankly, and by this way if he can accept you for who you are, then great, just don't expect too much, it'll just stress you out, I do have the same situation too, his asking for a mobile phone when it was his birthday, yet, I didn't give him, then after that day he jst ignores me, like nothing, maybe, he realized that I'm just a great trash, anyway I am bisexual,and if he'll love you back, it just calls for sex, good luck!=)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2010):

well, I'm gay too, and i know how you feel beacause we have the same situation. I'm in love to my best friend who is a 100% straight guy,but this guys treats me well and cares for me, he doesn't even take me for advantage. But one things for sure, he is not IN LOVE with me. I realize he is just a good person doing good things to me.

My advice, stop acting martyr, (clues are not effective, speacially to us gays, giving straight guys a clue can turn them off).

Beides, "there's still many fish in the sea" i'm sure you will catch one better than him... -_^

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A male reader, Boonridge McPhalify United Kingdom +, writes (4 May 2010):

Boonridge McPhalify agony aunthe doesn't sound interested in a sexual relationship with you and frankly dont let him use you and take the piss. treat yourself with respect, just because he has you wrapped around his finger doesn't mean he loves you back.

stop wasting your time and find a real love that loves you back and treats you well

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A male reader, aaronanonymous United States +, writes (28 April 2010):

Well some people here don't put things nicely. I concur he probably won't like you more than a friend. Trust me on that. When I was in middle school all the way through high school I was closeted to my best friend, and I tried letting him know on occasions. However it became harder and harder to do so. Eventually years later you'll realize there's someone else out there for you, as I did with my friend. That being said today I still talk to my friend and were still best friends, we love each other but are not intersted in anything else besides friendship. Because highschool is full of bullies, consider droppong the hints and once you feel the time is right let your friend know you are gay. If he's a good friend he'll accept you, but just wait a little more time for you both to mature. Also, maybe in the longrun you'll see he's not the best candidate for you

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A female reader, torch United Kingdom +, writes (28 April 2010):

torch agony aunttheres not really much you can do about this but im kind of in the same situation but the other way round ... i am in love with my gay best friend .. anyway you know he could never love you back in the same way so just stop giving him hints and start just acting like mates i know it is hard but wouldnt you rather him be in your life as a friend then not at all (also the people that say he can be in love beucase he is either "to young" or "not in a relationship" that dosnt mean anything he can still be inlove)

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A male reader, ManAfterChrist United States +, writes (27 April 2010):

ManAfterChrist agony auntYou don't love him, there is no relationship. You might have a pretty deep crush, but it isn't love. He's straight, and will never like you like that. Sorry bud but it ain't gonna work.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010):

It doesn't matter how many clues you give him, he isn't going to see them because he doesn't want to, because he's straight.

Think of it this way would you want to see the clues if a girl was giving them to you.

Don't let people walk all over you just because you want to be with them a relationship should be 50/50

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2010):

HE's straight, he'll never like you like that, ever! Get the point ,stop freaking him out by giving him clues.

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