A
female
age
18-21,
*andy apple 69
writes:Im having a hard time building a relationship with my 1 year old daughter. Dont get me wrong, i love her but its just so hard being a single parent. Sometimes i look at her and i just dont undertand why i have to be alone and take care of all the responsibilities. She's absolutely beautiful and people say she looks like me but sometimes i see her face and she just looks like a complete stranger. The worse part is that her dad and i never speak because he's a rapist and thats how she was created. I dont want to hate her, because she means the world to me but its hard because she looks like 'the other half' of her. Someone please help me. I just wanna love my daughter the right way. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, satindesire  +, writes (22 September 2009):
 I suffered with Postpartum Depression after giving birth to my daughter (who is nearly a month old now.) Please speak to your doctor about getting on antidepressants. I am taking Zoloft now and it works VERY well for me.
A
female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich  +, writes (22 September 2009):
 Icelordess, I do appreciate your answer very much.. and to you my dear... dont worry, you are not alone in this world, you just maybe didnt meet them.. be strong dont be hard to your self. give sometimes to your self a time to think... dont worry you will be fine, and your baby will be fine too..
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A
female
reader, icelordess + ♥, writes (22 September 2009):
 I don't think you are a bad person, I think you're very young, and had a child under extreme circumstances. Having been a single parent at 21 (after being married) I certainly know what you are going through. Its HARD work, and can be very scary and frustrating. And then compounding the fact is that you of course don't have any good feelings about the father. But sweetie listen..you've got to let go of that part of the equation ok? You obviously cared enough to have your daughter, rather than an abortion, so you did think things through and felt having the baby was what you wanted. I think you're just feeling stressed and overwhelmed. Do you have any family members that can help take your daughter sometimes and give you little breaks? My mom/grandmother were able to do this for me and give me some "alone" time...and it was much appreciated. As far as your feelings for your daughter, have you ever considered counseling? I think it might really benefit you so much. You need to get your feelings out in the open and deal with them and resolve the conflict that you feel. I'm sure that you love your daughter, no matter what the circumstances were that led to her birth. I know there were times when I disliked my daughter's father SO MUCH...but I still was so happy to have her..and I'm sure that you feel the same. PLEASE talk to someone ok? There are people that will help you. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  + ♥, writes (22 September 2009):
There is no right way to love your daughter. You're not a bad person, so don't think that at all. But there is a high probabilty that you're suffering from post natal depression because of the way you've been treated. Please please speak to a doctor or at least a counsellor. They'll help you. That's the best thing I can suggest. Hope it helps. x
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