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I'm bitter and angry, is this normal?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 January 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 January 2008)
A male United States age 30-35, *oviefan writes:

Is it normal for me to become bitter and angry after being hurt by someone. And hurt others because of it.

I have done things to others that i would never of done before, i have hurt others in my pain. And i always end up feeling worse because i realize what ive done. And i ve said im sorry to them. And luckily i havent hurt someone bad enought that i lose them as a friend, and im starting to worry if this continues i will. I dont want to care about the person who hurt me anymore but ill still do, and all it does is cause me pain and leads me to do these hateful or mean acts towards others often times without any thought it just happens.

I dont want to hurt others how can i stop this.

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A male reader, chlez83 Zambia +, writes (11 January 2008):

Life is a learning journey and all these experiences make you a better person only if you'll learn from them.You'll have to learn to adjust to circumstances as they come because not every person is the same and you can't treat everyone the same way.I don't know if you are into music but i find music a good comforter and stress reliever.

Tk care.

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A male reader, Moviefan United States +, writes (10 January 2008):

Moviefan is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Moviefan agony auntI have before this post been controlling it but my friends tend to like to bring up the subject in agitating ways and it causes me to more or less get very very antisocial to the point that when they try to get me back to normal igo off and hurt there feelings. I havent hurt my ex emotionally or physically, she hurt still. And thats what hurts the most. I will never and refuse to ever hit a women i have a feeling one post thought this.

I can to a point control this and have healthy ways to vent but even so sometimes there are times when i cant vent and things build up and i become completely antisocial and cant help but cry which has resulted in some of my peers wondering whats wrong. They know now, and they are see what she did to me and there pissed at her and i dont want them to be because being with her current boyfriend and past ex is worse then anything that they could ever do to her. I didnt tell them either they just filled in the holes..

I just didnt know if these feelings were normal..and if my reactions are.

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A male reader, chlez83 Zambia +, writes (10 January 2008):

When you are hurt there's a certain anger in you and you think the only way to relieve it is to vent out at others but part of growing up is learning how to control such feelings.So please start learning how to control yourself.Talk to someone you trust about what happened and i can assure you that with time it'll seem lighter.Don't spend alot of time alone,it really doesn't help.Focus on the people around you and not the one that has hurt you.Allow yourself to be happy.

Take care

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A male reader, rigwire United States +, writes (10 January 2008):

Hi, I understand your pain and it's only human nature to feel like you have to hurt others in order to make yourself feel..."superior". What you have to understand is in order to stop your "rage" you have to bring closure to whatever it was that you had with this ex of yours. You also have to sit down with yourself and think about what your doing to others, I realize you already know....but do you really know. lol if that made any sense. What i mean about that is you can potentially ruin her views about guys and place a general idea about guys based on how you treated her. It could become a vicious cycle. You have to do your part and stop that cycle. I believe in you man. We all come to this site for a reason and hopefully leave with an answer and a better person so I hope this answer blog was a help. Good luck man

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