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I'm a virgin. How can appear to be experienced at sex my first time?

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Question - (6 January 2006) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 January 2006)
A male , anonymous writes:

Hey I need help I am a virgin male. I recently met a girl, and she is an expert in sex. What must I do while having sex, to not appear that I am having sex for the first time?

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A female reader, Bev Conolly Australia +, writes (6 January 2006):

Bev Conolly agony auntYou don't need to pretend to be experienced. Every person is different and enjoys different things in bed, so even if you had had sex with a dozen other women, this new woman would still be an exploratory experience.

Some people think that experimenting and exploring what your partner enjoys is the biggest sexual thrill there is, so relaaxxxx! Don't fib about your experience. If you're intimate enough to be having sex with her, you should be intimate enough to be honest, OK?

Tell your girl the truth, that this is going to be your first time. That's nothing to be ashamed of! After all, every one of us was a virgin at one time, including her. It's not like admitting you have leprosy, c'mon! ;-)

Make sure that you have a supply of condoms and figure that the first time you have sex, it's going to go faster than you'd have preferred. (That's pretty common and nothing to worry about.) Then you're free to try all the little ideas that you can she can think of together. If you're not sure how to please her, just *ask*: "Do you like it when I do this?" Her response will give you an idea of what to do, and when.

Try to remember that sex is supposed to be fun, and everyone does it differently. There's no right or wrong as long as you both enjoy what's happening. Take your time, try different things, make it exciting.

Good luck.

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A female reader, purrfectionist84 +, writes (6 January 2006):

purrfectionist84 agony auntDo you love this girl? Are you ready for sex?

If so, then BE HONEST with her! So what if you are a virgin! You shouldn't have to pretend to be someone or something that you're not. If she cares for you, then she won't mind that you're a virgin, and she'll be happy to show you the ropes. (Have you seen the movie called "The 40 Year Old Virgin?") Just be yourself and be confident about who you are!

Whatever you do, be careful and use protection! If she is an expert in sex, as you say, then she must have been intimate with several men. Hopefully she is also an expert in using protection, but in case she isn't, remind yourself that it isn't worth taking any risks as far as sexually transmitted diseases (or pregnancy) are concerned.

Take care.

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