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I'm a girl who's in love with my best friend's girlfriend! She loves me too, but she won't break it off with him...

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 April 2005) 2 Answers - (Newest, 15 April 2005)
A , anonymous writes:

Hi I have a big problem. My best friend is a guy and I'm a girl, but I've fallen in love with his new girlfriend. She said she has loved me for ages but won't end it with my best friend. I love her so much and it kills me seeing them together and even him talking about her makes me pschyo. What should I do?

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A reader, cheyenne +, writes (15 April 2005):

There is one thing that I can almost be certain that will happen - the world will go on, no matter what you all decide to do. However, just take into consideration that this time, you have the upper hand. You're the third wheel and the deciding factor to your best friend's happiness. I'd consider THAT a pretty powerful place to be.

The next time, however, there will be someone, and that someone will be standing right where you are, and what THEY decide for themselves, they also then, decide for you. Period. Lets hope for your sake, that whatever they decide, they're the "friend" that you had thought they were to you. Remember, never expect others to be the person who they say they are, if you aren't the person you say YOU are. Confusing? Not half as much as it will be for your best friend when he learns of all of this.

Sure, right now, everything may be a win/win in YOUR situation, but, when you have these kind of scruples for yourself, then remember, you've also okayed them, with everyone. In otherwords, you can only expect to get back what you are willing to give... or take.

Just heed the warning, and good luck.

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A reader, x-clare-x +, writes (6 April 2005):

Well now, this could be a big problem. You seem to be in a pretty big dilema. I think what you need to do is actually suss out whether or not you are actually in love with each other or whether or not it is lust. You would feel so bad if you broke up with your best friend over a girl and it turns out not to be the real thing. Anyway, surely if this girl wanted to be with you as much as you wanted to be with her then there wouldn't be an issue. She wouldn't be dating your friend!

It sounds to me as if it should be left well alone. After all your friends should always come first. No matter what happens.

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