A
female
age
18-21,
*endine
writes:There is this beautiful girl who goes to my school and I'm in love with everything about her from her looks to her knowledge. She has blond hair and blue eyes and she has one hell of a body.(brace yourselves this is gonna be a long heart-breaking story). She is also one year ahead of me so this story makes more sense.I had met her in the girls toilets (which was the most hilarious thing ever) but that story a bit too long so I'm not gonna go into too much detail. I was in year 7 (she was in year 8) when this happened, however I never really had feelings for her at the time it was just a funny memory with her. I then noticed that she goes on the same school bus as me but never thought much about it. Couple months later my feelings towards her grew deeper however I just brushed it of and was like 'eh its nothing'. Then came sports day where the whole school were together and then I saw her in her PE kit and she looked like and angel, my heart melt from looking at her. I couldn't stop looking at her I just couldn't , watching her run was a little funny I guess. Then came the holidays where I realised I liked her, I liked her a lot. I just wanted to see her , that's it, I was and still am a really shy person so I could never have the guts to tell her the truth. Now came year 8 and she got even more prettier and I swear I was the only person who stayed the same -_- And god this year hit me hella hard. So she started dating this guy and for the first couple of months when they were dating I was in denial and didn't accept that they were dating. Then she put her bf's name in her insta bio with a love heart and he did the same. And that's when I was forced to accept the fact they were dating, and it broke my heart. I couldn't stand when they were together especially when they got really cuddly and touchy. however the annoying thing is she still acknowledged my existence as if she just wanted me to be hurt. she looked at me with these eye and I just couldn't come to hate her. Then one day I was walking... I turn my head left and I see them kissing. I was having a break down. I was dying. I was nothing. I had no worth or Value. I was angry I had like her for 1 and half years, why couldn't that be me.I cried that night, and I remember that night so perfectly because of how long I cried for. she was my everything and she didn't even know it. she didn't even know I die for her. Then I decided to go on a school trip to Spain so I could ignore everything and have a great time with my mates. I went to the Spain meeting and guess who was there, her and her bloody bf. It was to late to back out now so I had to go Spain and watch them be together as my heart crumbledinto pieces. I envied her bf, he got to be with such and amazing person who full of life (her name literally translated to full of life). Then year 8 ended badly with my unrequited love.It was the holiday and then I find out she had broken up with her boyfriend and I was overwhelmed with happiness. I was so happy to the point you would never understand. I had never actually talked to this girl apart from look at her but that was enough for me at the time. But now I wanted more. So then started year 9 (she was in year 10) and one day I forced myself to talk to her and decided to pop up to her on insta and we talked a lot and I told her a lot about me.I was so happy, like soooo happy when she was talking to me. she asked for my SC and I gave it her and we would talk on there . However we never talked in real life never ever did we talk in real life. one day the school bus was really late (at this point I had loved her for 3 years) and it was raining really badly and idk why the fuck I did it but I decided to talk to her and she was happy that I talked to her and I was as well. and I guess you could say we are good friends but not best friends.And now at this point I really wanna tell her because next year she is going leave and I don't want to die with regrets. But the thing is it took me 3 year to come and just be friend with her and I really really don't wanna ruin our friendship because is the only thing I have that connect me and her. so please tell me weather i should admit my feeling to her or not
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a break, best friend, kissing, my ex, shy Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 January 2017):
 honey you don't love her, you don't even know her apart from what she looks like. I know at your age it seems heartbreaking and that the world is going to end, I bet in ten years when you look back you will smile about the memories and barely even remember her name. I wouldn't tell her how you feel as it is more than likely she is straight if she has a boyfriend, and also school is a place where you can get bullied for liking someone who doesn't have the same sexuality as you. I think you would regret it if you did tell her as more than likely that would be the end of that friendship. I think you have a crush on her and you have built her up in your head to be much more than she is.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2017): The short answer is no...... your still in school and kids are cruel you'd be opening a can of worms that you can not close.
When I was at school two girls were caught kissing in the toilets and they were really bullied
Congratulations on knowing who you are but just think of consequences of coming out there's a time and a place if you feel it's right when its right do it..... don't ever hide who you are but at your age wait till your at an age to expieriment
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2017): No, no, no, no,no!
Dont push your luck and reveal yourself as totally loved up at the thought of something romantic!
She hasnt given you any signs at all of being anything more than just friendly.
Dont even go there, please.
Leave it all on a friendly happy note without any heart rendering confessions
Keep yourself and your daydreams to yourself so to her you are just that charming friend.
A crushing defeat just isnt worth it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2017): Hi sweetie,The biggest question here is, she was dating a guy and is probably straight. You could still try though. Honey when I was going through your post, the things you described sounded more like you are a big fan of her. She's more like a star you worship, an idol you 'd follow and a sort of obsession that girls and boys of your age have. Some will be obsessed with a celebrity, or a sports team or a band. Some might be obsessed and fanatic about someone closer, like a schoolmate or a teacher. Day dreaming stuff. This is very normal. I'm very sorry to break it to you, but dating and love is quiet different from adoring or being floored by somebody's personality. This sort of infatuation turning into a relationship is even more dangerous. You say you'd die for her, then what would you do if you both date and she broke up with you? I'm worried for you dear. This kind of attraction is a bit unhealthy. Love is not equal to worship. I think you should focus on your own self worth. Build your confidence first to the point where you want to be with someone because you think he/she is worth you and is capable of giving you the love you want.Take your chance if you want, ask her out but do not be fazed at all if she says no or something goes wrong in your relationship in future.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (7 January 2017):
 Okay, you're not going to like this, but I think you need to be brought into reality: you're infatuated with her, not in love. Also, you won't die with regrets about her because you'll hardly remember her when you're old.Anyway, your feelings for her are sweet, but a bit obsessive, so I think you need to get them under control - your hormones are blowing it out of proportion :PYou either need to ask her out or cut contact completely, as you can't be friends with someone you want more from - you'll never move on.Be brave and tell her you like her (be blunt, not subtle, but not as dramatic as this post), but be prepared to end your friendship if she's not interested or if you choose not to ask her out. Staying friends will just hurt you more.
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