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I'm 17 and my mom's 42 year old friend has the hots for me!

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 July 2010) 9 Answers - (Newest, 27 July 2010)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I'm 17 and my mothers best friend is a teacher she tough me as a privet tutor for some of my studies I took at school. She is always popping round to our house to see my mum however she confessed to me the other day that since I was 13 and she started tutoring me that she has had strong feelings towards me and said she loved me. She is 42 and never been married or engaged what should I do? I have feelings for her but dont know what to do?

View related questions: best friend, engaged

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010):

Usually I'm a fan of the 'age doesn't matter'-stream, but this really does go quite far. There is no way in the world that you can ever have a normal relationship with this woman (normal being the operative word; if you're strong-willed and really want to go for it, no matter what anyone says, you might just make it work - just consider that everybody will have an opinion about it, that she will be 55 when you're 30, and that you can never have kids the natural way).

If you don't see this kind of future at all and are only think about having some exciting affair, just consider the mess it will be when the whole thing comes out: she will be fired, you'll have to go to therapy, your mother will be seriously hurt.

My advice is not to go along with this and, if she ever mentions the subject again and will not let it go after you have made your opinion clear, to tell your mother.

Since your feelings for her aren't that strong yet, you would do well not to let them get any heavier. Good luck, and I hope you will find a way out of this.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010):

TELL YOUR MOTHER

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2010):

The BIG red flag here for me, is that she is saying she LOVES you. How the hell is that possible if she hasn't been romantic and gotten to know you like that? That tells me if you dabbled here, she might turn pshycho on you. Stay away dude. She's obviously not in touch with her emotions or self identity. Even if you just had sex or romance, it wouldn't be natural, and I see problems.

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A female reader, zarajane United Kingdom +, writes (23 July 2010):

So she was 38 and she liked a 13 year old? thats messed up

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A female reader, EbonyBlossom United Kingdom +, writes (22 July 2010):

EbonyBlossom agony auntNO. She is TOO OLD for you. I'm really sorry but it's fact - she'll have different expectations to you, and if you stayed with her you would probably never have a family. You won't get to have fun with girls your age.

Tell her very clearly that you are not interested.

Also tell your Mum about the situation.

Good luck =]

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2010):

She is either a peadofile, or your making this up because you wish it was true. If your not lying then tell your mum.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2010):

Perve alert! Stay away from this woman. She is attracted to unusually young boys and this is why she has never been married. She needs to figure out her own mental issues.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2010):

You are 17 and she is 25 years older than you AND she has had the hots for you since you were 13. I would recomend you keep your distance from her and you tell her to do the same.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (22 July 2010):

Since you were 13? That's a bit creepy. Methinks this woman is someone you need to back away from.

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