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I'm 15 and pregnant! I can't tell my parents...What shall ! do?

Tagged as: Pregnancy, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 October 2006) 86 Answers - (Newest, 17 April 2010)
A female , anonymous writes:

im 15 and pregnant! what shall i do??? it was a mistake, im not with the father of the baby, i got drunk and got carried away! help, i cant tell my mum or dad or anyone! how am i gonna tell them!?! they will be crushed!

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A female reader, teenager United Kingdom +, writes (17 April 2010):

teenager agony aunti am 15 and i done a test this morning i am scared because my boyfriend said that if i ever did fall pregnant he would leave me then i will be a lonly single mum at 15 ! i can talk to my mam about this so i am lucky i surpose she wont be happy but there isnt a lot i could do i think it is rong to get rid of a baby as they are just one of us therefore i dont believe in it but if you cant tell your parents you need to find someone you can talk to unless its all going to be one tough rie by yourself good luckk hope your ok x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2010):

its okay im 17 and pregnant and my mom found out because i was throwing up alot and sleeping but you need to tell her so you can go to the doctor and take care of the baby and if you have a close older sister then tell her or aunt or anyone who you are close to tell them so you can get help

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2010):

hi im alot like u but im 12 and pregnant.I slept at my friends sisters house (shes 20) they had a huge party they said anyone come so i invited my best friend cody.Meanwhile they gave cody lots of drinks (hes 12) he drank way to much and stayed the night at her house.it was 2 rooms so we shared a bed in a room and he said he had protection but that never happend.The following month ive been throwing up yet gaining wheight and getting a belly.Know mind u hes a friend and he took me to the doctor with his mom and found out i was pregnant.MY mom has no idea but 12 and pregnant i was stupid.

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A female reader, usach33rx33 United States +, writes (15 March 2010):

usach33rx33 agony aunti think you should tell the guy if anything first. see how his relationship with his parents are. If his parents seem more understanding and less strict deff. tell them first. if you want an abortion they can sign for you and do everything without your parents even knowing. but it comes down to if you want to keep it, or if your looking for a way out and cant find one.

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A female reader, healer444 United States +, writes (8 March 2010):

just tell them and they will deal with it but i had my son when i was 13 and i gave him up to a loving family just be storng and think about it do u wanna keep the child or just give him up think long and hard and next time be on the pill or tell him to use condoms have fun and luv u ill pray for u until that baby pops out lol ok bye

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2010):

im 15 and im pregnant. even though im still with the father. i haven't came round to telling my parents yet. i guess i am scared to. i a plannin on tellin them when we go out for a meal on mothers day. i think my mum will be happy but my dad will be shocked. i suppose it has got to be done. good luck :)just go for it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2010):

Well I am 15 and pregnant as well and I was in your shoes, I was scared to tell my parents but you just have to come out with it and say it. Once you do you will feel so much better. You need to do something soon bc noy only is your health at stake but so is your baby's.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2010):

well i had sex with my boyfriend three weeks ago. ever since i got my periods three years ago they have always been late (im 15). i havent gotten mine in a month and a half, this is kinda normal for me but now that im having sex im worried that im pregnant. we always use condoms and he only came out but i checked that and there wasnt any holes in it but im still worried!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2010):

Hey i'm 15 and pregnant as well, luckily me and my mum have a great relationship so telling her wasn't as hard as it could have been, but never the less it was a scarey thought. Once i'd told her though it was such a relief and no matter how much they are angry, upset, disapointed or whatever their love for you will never change. I was thinking about having an abortion without my family knowing but the decision i made to tell them was a really good one, now i'm expecting my baby in 3 months and all is going well, i'm sure the same will apply to you. Good luck hun i'm sure u'll be fine and if u decide to keep him/her will be a great mum :) xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2010):

first you need to decide if you want to keep the baby or get an abortion, but it's a scary thought because sometimes abortion can cause difficulties when you actually want to have a baby later on in life, you could also have the baby and give it up for adoption or have it fostered until you feel you're ready to take care of it. You should also tell the father that you're pregnant and see what he thinks about it, or what his outlook on keeping the baby is. Another thing is, you need to be able to tell you're parents, you have to. Yes, they will be hurt, but they will get over it. To be honest, you're parents are the only people who knows what's best for you. I'm 15 aswell, and i understand why you're so scared, i thought i was pregnant, turns out i wasn't. I hope you make the right choice, whatever that is, there really is no right choice, it's just the choice you feel is right. Good luck.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

Babee, Im sure if you told them they will support you, that is what parents are there for. I think abortion is out of the question. If you are not able to take care of your child, adoption is a better solution. There are thousands of couples out there that are unable to have children, who would love your child and care for it. If you do indeed decide to keep your baby, tell your parents as soon as. They will be more angry you kept your pregnancy from them. Just simply explain that it was a mistake and they are sure to come around. [email address blocked]. Add me, if you need to talk babe :) x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010):

Your parents shoud be the least of your worries. If they really love you and care about you, they will stand by your side and help you as much as you let them. But first you gotta tell them. I know how you feel, I just turned 15 and I'm 2 monthes pregnant. I told my boyfriends parents first because he's 18 and I knew his parents would be more understanding. But I thought my mom would bite my head off, but she didn't. of course she was upset, but its a life changing situation.I wish I could help you more, but I don't even know how to help myself right now. But good luck and I hope things go well for you

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A female reader, mommy1525 United States +, writes (16 February 2010):

I'm currently in the same situation i am 15 and 5 months pregnant.I told my mom and step dad right away though.My dad was a different story,he still doesn't know and I haven't seen him since October.Tell you the truth,it won't be easy,but your parents will accept it,which is why u should tell them sooner than later,I know it was the best choice for me.

But my mistake when I got pregnant was that I was with someone the week that we figured out i got pregnant and then 3 weeks later with someone else,yes i know that makes me sound like a "whore" or a "slut" but i'm not,I'm a party girl,and love to drink!I don't normally sleep with guys,but anyways back to my point,at first I didn't know who the father was until a month ago when we found out for sure how far along i was,and I felt really HORRIBLE.So I had more than one other set of parents to tell,then had to face them and say im not sure yet who's the father,so be lucky,if u know who the father is.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2009):

hey!!

I have been through this. I was in the same situation.me and this guy were at a party and we were both drunk. it all started out with foreplay and then went into somthing more.anyway what ended up happening was i told justin(father)that i might be pregnant. and i kno it was his because i was a virgin before that night. and at first he was like no its not mine its not possible.then he came upto me after school and we walked to the local drugstore and bought a few pregnancy tests. i took them at his place and they all came out positive. i am not trying to scare you so here is the good part. first we told his mom and dad.then came my parents i told my mom and she was very upset with both of us and my dad wanted to shoot him but once i sat down and talked to them they were ok with it.anyway had my son june 7th 2009 he is the love of my life and me and justin are getting married this summer coming up.=)i hope this helps take off the nerve.everything is going to be ok.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2009):

You should tell your parents. I new someone that got prego at the age of 14 and she is having a tuff time right know.Her boyfriend left her and her parents kicked her out and she is living with her grandparents who understand. There are many options out there jsut don't abort!!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2009):

you need to tell someone i have 3 children and am expecting my 4 th child i was 18when i had my first i am 24 just now 3 kids and 1 on the way so 1 kid is not that bad tell someone ask for help and good luck in what ever choise you make !!! x x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009):

Okay well I'm in the same situation as you and I need help also I think my parents would kill me when they found out but I'm going to have to tell them anyways and me and my ex-Boyfriend had sex just 6 days ago and I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant even though I can't tell if I am or not yet but I am pretty sure I am! So someone please please help me!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009):

im 14 and have just found out that i am pregnant, im shit scared and planning on telling my parents tonight, i dont know how though, the first thing they will ask is who is the dad, but i dont even know that, i have had sex with about 17 different boys in the past 5 month, it could be any of them! my dad has asked me if i was pregnent and i stupidly said no, 2 mounths in! My mum will be so dissopointed in me, and so will my dad. how do i tell them, i cant just come out and say, aw just so you know im having a baby! i dont even know anything about birth, how much does it hurt? my nana gave birth at 16, but that is like 2 years older than me, so she wil not be best pleased. somebody please help. I told my 2 best friends and one of them said she will support me all the way through no matter what, but the other called me an anerexia slut (im very thin, not anerexia though!!) and now she is not my friend, even though she has sex alot more than me, and jsut because the condom broke, itds such a crime! my mum does know i have had sex because she has walked in on me more than 5 times! but i had to beg her not to tell my dad, he would beet the living day lights out of him, he gave one or my past bf's a blue nose because we were making out on the sofa, and i was only in a bra! what would he do if he found out that i was pregnant? IM also really scared because 2 of the boys i have had sex with (possible fathers) are 19 + 17, mum + dad would go of it! non of the boys i have had sex with are aware of this, i cant remember some of them, so it looks like i am raising this kid alone, i dont want an abortion because its murder.

please help, i broke down into tears when i took the test, please help me, how can i tell my mum + dad, they will hate me and kick me out.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2009):

I'm 15 and pregnant with my boyfriend of a year. We miscarried before, but we did use a condom. Which I later found out had a hole. He's not answering right now and I think his parents took his phone away. I told my one friend but I'm terrified. I know what's right but righb now I just want to hide my head in the sand. I need help. And I don't have any money, and in addition to all of this a few weeks ago this guy tryed to rape me. I told my boyfriend but I'm afraid if I tell him I'm pregnant he'll think it's the other guys. School starts tomorrow, HELP!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2009):

have u thought of telling them how it happened?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2009):

I think that you should just sit your parents down and have

a very gentle talk with them and if they really honestly

love you then they will help you get through this for whatever

your decision is to have the baby or not.

their your parents their suppose to be there fore you.

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A female reader, katielm3 United States +, writes (1 July 2009):

katielm3 agony auntI think you should tell your parents'. They need to know. I know it will be hard, but they are going to be the grandparents' to your baby.

You can tell your parents' and see what their reaction is, or move into a home for pregnant teens and tell your parents why you have to move.

It's not going to be an easy task, but you should do it. if you need any help or just need someone to talk to you can e-mail me here at Dear Cupid.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2009):

I feel your pain, hun. I'm 15 aswell, and I'm kinda in the the same position.

I don't know for sure yet, but it's really scary thinking you are.

I personally think you should tell your parents, because right now, they're your only support on this situation . There's no boyfriend to help you out. My parents always told me that if I were to get pregnant, by accident or not, they'd want to keep it. A grandchild now is better than mo grandchild in the future. Abortions can damage your uterus, and make it SUPER hard for constraception for when you're older.

I know you're probably shitting your pants, but it's better to inform your parents. They can help you. Trust me. And I know that going through this alone is the last thing you want to do.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2009):

Abortions. Adoptions. Tell your parents. And then decide to have either an abortion or to adopt the kid out. I believe there is something just evil about many couples who are financially and mentally capable of having kids, but go through so much pain and go to h ell and back trying, but still can't, yet so many young people like yourselfs who aren't capable in any way to take care of a baby just take advantage of your physical ability to reproduce and multiply like caged rabbits. I'm 21, my 19 year old sister is pregnant. She lives in a van with her boyfriend. I won't speak to her because she won't consider an abortion or adoption. It's wrong to have kids you can't take care of because you can't use birth control, while many deserving couples have broken hearts because they can't conceive.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2009):

You need to tell them, i'm 15 and if i was pregnant i would defentley tell them, yes they may be dissapointed in you and are ashamed but at the end of the day your parents will always stick by you and help you to make the right decision. I would tell them if i was you, they will be even more distrought if you do NOT tell them.

From Kate

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

(MOD NOTE: You should really post your question on the board, click on "ASK FOR HELP" so that Aunts/Uncles can answer your questions directly to you)

okaay, so i need some help to. im fifteeen years old, and im pregnant. the father is not my boyfriend, and never was :/ i dont live with my parents, i live with my aunt and uncle because my father hit me... and verbally abuses me all the time. thats the reason i dont live with my dad. my aunt and uncle are very supportive people, but yet im afraid to tell them that im pregnant; because i snuck outta their house to have sex with this 19 year old :/.

i told the father of the baby, and he said he would support me, and he has already told him mom. she has agreed to help too. but im affraid if i tell my aunt and uncle they will be pissed! not only because i am pregnant but because they are very very very racist, and the father of the baby is black :/ while im white :/ (dont lecture me on the mixed races thing, i know, i dont care... i have enough problems... thanks.]

please help me, or give me some advice.. i read some of the above things; and im so affraid! im terrified! i know i could raise a baby since i have 5 brothers and sister, and i practically raised them.. my life is hard enough, a baby will only make it harder... i will NOT have an abortion.. i have thought about it, but its completely wrong. no way in helll would i do that :/ i have also considered adoption because i wouldnt want my baby to have to deal with all the problems in my lifee and soon to be probably theirs :/ ahhh what do i do?!?!?

damn i dont know what to do! :/ jeese sometimes my life is soooo hard, i want to diee!!! :/

HELPPPPP!!!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2009):

Tell them... it wont be that bad... if they find out with out you telling them then they will be more angry. Tell them what happened and how oyu need to fix it. They will be mad, any parent would. But they will be more mad when then start seeing a bump. Trust me this happend to me

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A female reader, kye979 United Kingdom +, writes (18 May 2009):

ARE YOU OK?? Are you saying your dad would beat you or you think he will because your pregant. If you need some help email please hear at Dear Cupid! and take care.

(MOD NOTE: Private email addresses are not allowed to be given out but people can email you here on Dear Cupid if they wish.)

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A female reader, PWENCESS1 United Kingdom +, writes (12 May 2009):

well i am 13 and i am pregnant i still dont know what to do ever i am already 4 months a time is flyin past what i suggest is tell someone like a best friends mum so she can tell your mum or text her or write it in a note and i garantee you she will not react the way youy think she will shes your mum but tell her soon and figure out what to do before its to late and the chioce is made for yooh

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A female reader, PWENCESS1 United Kingdom +, writes (12 May 2009):

well i am 13 and i am pregnant i still dont know what to do ever i am already 4 months a time is flyin past what i suggest is tell someone like a best friends mum so she can tell your mum or text her or write it in a note and i garantee you she will not react the way youy think she will shes your mum but tell her soon and figure out what to do before its to late and the chioce is made for you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2009):

My daughter is 17 and she just told me that she is pregnant. I was a little sad for her; because I know how difficult raising a baby is going to be, but I plan to be supportive and kind and just love her through it. I am sure that your parents will do the same for you. I know its scary to have to tell Mom and Dad something that will probably be shocking, but as long as your family loves you (and it sounds like they do), they will help you work it all out. Telling is the easy part. It's raising babies that's hard. You're going to need your family to support you. Maybe, you can speak to your older sister, and have her and her husband help you tell your Mom and Dad what's going on. Sometimes, its nice to have a little help when you're scared. I will pray for you, honey. Good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2009):

I was pregnant at 15 too. I am now almost 17. I have a daughter. Unfortunatly there is nothing you can do but tell your parents. whether you decide to tell them one on one, with the help of your guidance counseler or even a family doctor. Anyway you do it they need to know.

Personally, I went to my guidance counseler who made a meeting for the 3 of us and helped me tell them. As crushed as they may be they need to know. I too, did not want to tell my parents, they believed I was a 'good, little kid' but no, I did things they never knew, so it came as a suprise. Anyways, you really need to tell them. Also, sonsider your options. Look at what you can do. I kept my daughter after a long hard desicion. I personally didnt even think of abortion, but I did consider adoption. Alright,well thats a little more than you needed to know right now but just know that is what you have to consider in the future.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009):

I'm 15 and I've just found out im pregnant, I got really drunk and ended up pregnant. The main problem is that I suffer frm anorexia (plz don't lecture me about that I really have enough problems) so I didn't use protection coz ma periods r so fucked up i stupidly didn't think it cud happen 2 me.

I haven't told anyone can't tell my parents they wud kill me and even tho I cud tell my friends, i can't trust them 100%,

and just as yoo think it can't get any worse my bf of 6 months isn't the father. He was away, I went to a party got drunk and knocked up.

I really don't no what 2 do im so scared i dnt want this baby, it wudn't be fair.

i dnt really want an abortion even tho im not ready and i dnt want to have 2 gain weigh and have a baby im not sure i cud do it.

i kno i sound lke some stupid little slut but accidents happen

plz any advice or help wud be greatly appreciated, what did yoo do ?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2008):

well im also 15 and my boyfriend is 19 and i just found out i was pregnant today when i found out i was wit my boyfriend and i just started crying but then i just went to school and i told my best friends about it and it made me feel so much better...i am extremely scared...but im so glad i have my boyfriend by my side and i know hell be there for whatever i always knew he was the man i wanted to marry and that is why i lost it to him. my mom knows weve had sex and she has been asking me if i was pregnat because i have been getting really chubby i want to tell her but im really scared i know shell support me but im just scared that im going to hurt her my boyfriend already told his mom and his sisters and theyre all happy for me...but i couldnt be more scared but i am going to keep it im so amazed a baby is growing inside of me its the best feeling...i know my life will change but im happy wit my life at this point

and good luck to all of you

take care

and your posts helped me A LOT!!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2008):

I know you think your world is coming to an end, Your frightened and confused. You need to see your local G.P (doctor) as soon as possible miss school anything go see him or her and explain the problem to them. Im going to have a rant and its not to you directly its to all girls aged 11 to 16.

Using drink as an excuse is not going to wash with your parents. Going home and telling them you was drunk will only make matters much worse. Your 15 to them your a child your there little girl and until your 18 u will be.till you have left school and are ready to face the world alone. they will think they need to be there and support you. there only going to chew ya ears of and say

1. You shouldnt be drinkin at all to the extent you cant say no or use protection. Im disgusted with you.

2. You shouldnt be having sex till your 16 anyway do you know how much trouble this lad can be in if his names mentioned for having sex with a minor. He can be sent to prison.

3. Your parents and school will have drilled you since puberty stating about safe sex and not getting pregnant why didnt you use a condom. There free at family planning. Even schools issue them now free.

So there is no excuses you can use that will convince a good parent they have done wrong by you. They want the best for you thats true,But getting pregnant so young is not what they want. Its hard enough to raise a child when your mid 20's not 15. your still a child yourself. Enjoy your childhood dont try to grow up too fast. The years pass so quickly and once them years have gone you cant get them back. Enjoy being a girl and going out with your friends dancing and goin on holiday its too early for you to be up all night and changing nappies every 2 or 3 hours and having a baby crying half the night you need to tend too.

You have no way of rasing a child yourself. so you are bring extra exspence on your parents and its them that will have to raise this child for you because you cant afford too. Clothes food nappies bottles sterilising stuff, cots , push chairs costs £1000's not a couple of hundred quid. A condom is free. So please to you and any other girl reading if you have any sense at all dont let that lad have sex without one.I dont care how much you love him or how bad your crush is.Make him wait or tell him to get lost.If hes the right guy he will wait years for you to have something special. If hes after one thing make him get it else where. Have pride in yourself.

Im a proud father of a 13yr old Daughter. shes not pregnant thank god. but she does talk to me about urges and feelings she gets. I cant stop her having sex when she thinks its right but i can advise her to be safe.

Our bond is like a mother and daughter her mother isnt the understanding type and were no longer married. I love my daughter more for knowing she can talk to me about anything and i wont bite her head off. I wish you the best of luck.If you think your mum will trip out go talk to your dad alone and tell him calm and gently you think your pregnant i made a mistake i need your help. He maybe more understanding than you think. Take care, A concerned reader / Parent..

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A female reader, BabyDueApril16th United Kingdom +, writes (31 August 2008):

hello, i'm also 15 and pregnant i'm 7weeks gone, i was so scared of telling my parents, maybe it was a mistake but does that make the baby ? I was so scared of telling my parents but I had to I sat them down and said "mum and dad i know you will be ashamed and dissapointed and i'm sorry but i'm pregnant, yes they was angry but now they are fine with it and i'm really happy they are really supporting me now. If you're not with the father then thats an even better excuse to tell you're parents because no-one else will give you support apart from them. If you want to keep the baby then thats more important because if you stress out to much about telling them then you will lose the baby. It's totally up to you whether keeping the baby if you want to keep it then DO NOT let anybody talk you into having an abortion its you're baby and you're decision, if you dont want to keep the baby DONT let anybody talk you into keeping the baby, its whats best for you at the end of the day. if you want to add me on msn to chat more about it then please do my msn is [email address blocked] i hope this has helped darling x x x love laura

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A female reader, BigSis United Kingdom +, writes (4 August 2008):

BigSis agony auntWonder if she's had any more?

I'm also wondering if she's 5ft nothing.

Oh, Hello Lestat, didn't see you up there.

: )

xXx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2008):

By now she's probably a grandma, please look at the date, this lady had her problem in 2006. It's nice that people care, but I doubt she needs our help anymore.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2008):

you've got to tell your parents! they're gonna find out sooner or later, so it would be better you telling them rather them finding out for themselves.

trust me, i've been in your shoes and i was only 14 at the time!!!

p.s. you didnt say how far you are

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008):

Look. You need to tell your parents. They may be mad at first but they will be there to support you-they're your parents remember. I suggest sitting down with them and talking about it in a mature manner. You didn't say what you want to do with the baby but whatever you want, express this to your parents but take into account what they think you should do. They know best and you are their daughter. Good Luck. XX

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):

i think you should sit your mum down and tell her the truth

tell her that you dont want to get an abortion and you care for your child

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A female reader, misspayasitax3 El Salvador +, writes (9 June 2008):

Well wat can I say I am goin thour the same thing I have no 1 rii now all I have id my boyfriend I cant tell my mom cuz she will kick mi out I dont want 2 drop it so idk wat 2 do but if I was u I will go tell sum1 u really trust sum1 that won't ket u down u feel mii but I hope u the best of lucks

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008):

hi i think you shouled try and tell your famaly are a teacher at school someone you can rely on so you can get this ot in the open then you can disied what you are going t do but do not do anything rash for that could be a big mastak i can not tell you what to do with the baby but try and speek to someone good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008):

Hi: first off all i want to let you know your not on your own this happens to many people and help is out there for everyone whatever age and whatever satiation, you need to think of what you want to do tho as no-one can do that for you,I am 17, 18 in december and have nearly finished my course at college I've just found out i am 6 weeks pregnant, i am with the dad and have been for 2 years we are going to keep the baby but i still haven't told my mum and dad as i know they will be so disappointed with me but its something you have to do they may be angry and that at first but they are bond to come round at the end of the day you are there daughter and they love you. its your life you do what you fell best. i hope this may help you, good luck and i hope you do what you want to do and it all works out ok for you. x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008):

being 15 and pregnant is pretty hard. I lost my virginity at 15 and became pregnant when i was 15. The boy i was pregnant to was a Prik. He thort he was a bad boy and seriously had some life issues. All thoug i would love to have a baby i now know i made the right decision having it aborted as i personally dont think i would be able to handle having a baby at the tender age of 16. I know this is selfish but its something you have to think about...you can't go out partying, drinking, on hol wid ya mates you have to stay home and look and care after you baby.

On the other hand if you want to keep your baby and you are thinking of carrying threw the pregnancy, sit your mum or dad down and talk to them..don't hold it back by dropping in random questions like "what would you do if i was pregnant?" because no parent would react to this situation until it actually happend. They might say "oh id kick you out" but at the endof the day a parent is a parent there there to look after us and protect us, if they don't understand then talk to another member of the fam you trust!

hope all goes well. And wel done to all them young mums out there!!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2008):

I'm 15. Me and my bf had sex 3 months ago for the first time. We thought it was the right time. We have been together since we were 12, so 3 years now, almost 4.

We used protection but the condom split and i'm pregnant. I told my teacher and she supported me all the way.When I finally told my family, they were actually cool about it. They were dissapointed that i was so young, but happy i didnt get pregnant because of some one night stand, and that i'm having it with the person i believe i love, infact know i love, as i have been with Ryan since year 7.

Shortly after finding out i was pregnat ryan proposed to me and we are getting married after GCSE's, in couple of months. Baby should be born right after, great celebratory present!

everythings going really well, no complications so far, but then again it has only been 3 months, lets hope nothing goes wrong in the next 6months. I'm really looking forward to having my own little baby, who i will love and be a really good parent to, i would never think of giving it away or having it aborted, especially after seeing my first scan on monday, can just make out the body of my child. its truely beautiful. my fiance is extremely supportive and so are my family.

my advice to any young mums is, tell your parents if they are decent they will understand and support you but if they arent supportive then tell 'em to "eff off" and tell them that its your life and the child that you will bring into the world will make then smile and make them happy aswell as making you happy.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2008):

I'm 15. Me and my bf had sex 3 months ago for the first time. We thought it was the right time. We have been together since we were 12, so 3 years now, almost 4.

We used protection but the condom split and i'm pregnant. I told my teacher and she supported me all the way.When I finally told my family, they were actually cool about it. They were dissapointed that i was so young, but happy i didnt get pregnant because of some one night stand, and that i'm having it with the person i believe i love, infact know i love, as i have been with Ryan since year 7.

Shortly after finding out i was pregnat ryan proposed to me and we are getting married after GCSE's, in couple of months. Baby should be born right after, great celebratory present!

everythings going really well, no complications so far, but then again it has only been 3 months, lets hope nothing goes wrong in the next 6months. I'm really looking forward to having my own little baby, who i will love and be a really good parent to, i would never think of giving it away or having it aborted, especially after seeing my first scan on monday, can just make out the body of my child. its truely beautiful. my fiance is extremely supportive and so are my family.

my advice to any young mums is, tell your parents if they are decent they will understand and support you but if they arent supportive then tell 'em to "eff off" and tell them that its your life and the child that you will bring into the world will make then smile and make them happy aswell as making you happy.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008):

see, im pregnant and im 15, and me and my boyfriend dont live together but we see eachother more then we see our own parents.. we have been dating for pretty much a year and im like a month late for my monthly things.. i took a test but the reults showed negative.. i took a test last tusday i believe it was the date of around teusday the 3rd of march i was suppost to start the 23 of february.. so i would like to take a test again to show if i am.. becuz there are no signs showing i will have my period soon. usually i get like 3 days of cramps before my boobs hurt what ever... and now my back hurts and my boobs but no cramps im feeling sick and such... i think me and my boyfriend will be together and probably get married we both believe we are the one for eachother.. so we had sex.. im 15 and my bf is 17... only 2 years ahead.. it isnt like he is around maybie 20 or 19... its not something i would do. now. i do understand if you think you are old enough to have sex then you are old enough to know to protect yourself. but i am on birth control but we only use condoms once in a while.. not just cuz we dont like it. it is becuz they hurt me. it burns and such... he does the method of "pulling out".. i am scared to tell my mom. becuz i know she will be disappointed and i dont want my family name being known of a 15 year old in the family having a baby you know???

anywayz that is all for now i gess thanks for listening.:)

oh and also the stories above are VERY helful thank you.. but also one more thing i know im 15 and im not the most responsible of not protecting.. but i think 11 years old you should even be knowing what a condom is .. anywayz thanks for the attention#

no name xxx good luck to all younger mothers

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2008):

i got pregnant at age of 14 my life was just turned upside down. my baby girl is 4 now and is lovely she's the best thing that as ever happened to me.

i told my mum 3 months after i found i was pregnant we talked for ages and she and my sister help me everyday.

without them i wouldn't have known what to do.

tell your mum!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2008):

I think im pregnant to but I'm not sure! I haven't started my period in almost one month after the expecting month! I took a pregnancy test and it was negative but I'm still scared and I don't know what to do! I'm sick like dizzy and I don't know whats wrong! My mother and father are jackasses and would never understand! and my boyfriend the one who "knocked me up" says I should get an abortion but I don't believe in them, I've been looking at adoption and I think I'm going to do that instead of keeping it!

I think you should have the baby and if you want it keep it but if you can't take care of it just give it away to an adoption center! Your parents will hopefully understand, and if they don't then I don't know what to say! I'm sorry if I'm no help! but that's what I think!

LOVE a 15 year old!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2008):

i think i might be too! but i have a boyfriend and a nice mom who im sure will be ok with it eventually but she wants me to be very ambitious and i dont want to let her down. im fifteen now and in my last year of school if i am pregnant it wont be born untill im 16 and have left school, i know it will be really hard but im sure i'll have friends and family by my side. abortion isnt an option for me. im not against it at all, but personally i cant do that.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2008):

Hi. I'm 16 and I think I may be pregnant. I had sex on dec 21. And I should have started my period the 25th or something. It is jan 7th and I still haven't started. I'm pretty sure I am pregnant. And I'm so scared. My sister is 21 and just had her baby on christmas. My family always looked at me as the better daughter. Getting good grades and whatnot. My sister was into drugs and everything. But I'm the good one. I had sex with my boyfriend feb 2007. And I had to move. I haven't had sex with anyone since then. Although people have tried. But this boy. Wow I'm so in love its unbelievable. I knew he wanted to and I let him. Now I know it was a very dumb decision. He didn't force me or anything, but I just wanted to do what he wanted. I told him that I was scared about thiss. And he said I'm just over reacting and I'm not pregnant. But idk I just have a gut feeling that I am. I'm supposed to take a test soon. But its still unral that I'm online posting somethinglike this. I cannot tell my parents. My stepdad and my mom are always areguing about me. And how I'm gone all the time. He always puts me down and my mom always shoots me up like I am this perfect child. Wow I just can't let her down. I'm so scared. I'm thinking of everything. I'm thinking I should just take like 6 ecstasy pills and die. If my boyfriend adams family find out his life is ruined. He's this gorgeous boy with this perfect family, he has good grades and knows what he's doing in life. I'd rather just comit suicide so I don't ruin his life and be miserable. He says he will be there for me all the way. We can't afford an abbortion and I'm scared if I get an abortion the might tell my parents. Please help me.. [email address blocked]

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2007):

I was 12 when I found out I was pregnant, I didnt tell my parents but they saw i was getting fatter n so i covered up saying i needed to go on a diet n got baggy clothes. My mom soon sat down to chat with me about my wight. I eventully told her about 3-4 months into it and she had guessed that i was. She said that I WASN'T getting an abortion and I was having her grandkid. She told my dad and he left. My mom and sister were really great and bought my baby twins everything they needed. It was hard to tell her but especially when I had two 1 boy called Jake and 1 girl called Milee they are now 4 and are almost ready to start skl i am now 17 and i have met lots of people who were like me!!

I got pregnant when I was drunk so dnt ever drink or have sex underage!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007):

I also got pregnant at 15 while my boyfriend was 16. I knew I couldn't take care of my baby so I got an abortion. If you feel this is wrong there are other options. You could give the baby to an orphanage or even keep him/her. Although this may be extremely hard on average a baby cost $785 a month. I'm srry to tell you I don't think there is a way to keep this from your parents, they may be mad but I'm sure they'll understand.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2007):

i'm 17 and i am 1 month pregnant and i'm am terrified to tell my mom b/c she said if i am pregnant i can't live under her roof. but all parents aren't like that. if u know u have a supportive family just go ahead n tell them. i doubt that they will kick u out

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2007):

I was in your shoes at one point. I got pregant at 16 and delivered when i was 17. I was terrified of telling them but when i did they were mad but I felt releved and they soon got over the fact and accepted my decision to keep my baby boy who is now 4

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2007):

hi im 11 years old and im most likely pregnant witt my best friend's baby. I dont haf a boyfriend but i did haf sex witt my all tyme best friend which at the tyme i had a crush on and gotsz carried away witt it. Im a month pregnant due may.16th 2008, im so excited im having a gurl and im thinkin of naming her Victoria Lisette.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2007):

you will be okay. i wasn't as young as you but i was still a kid my self i was 16 when i got pregnant with my daughter and it was hard. things will work out i was a mother by the time i was 17 and i'm now 23 and my daughter is 6 and i also got a 11 month old son. i hope you tell your mom and everything works out for you. its not easy but you'll get throw all these hard spots and become brave and tell someone who will help you throw this

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2007):

i'm 14 (15 in one month) & i'm scared i'm pregnant. i didn't want to have sex. it was a drunken sper of the momment thing i feel horrible. this wasn't supose to happen. if you're thinking about having sex or drinking and you're underage don't do it. it isn't worth it. i hate this.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2007):

hi, im 17 and 17 weeks pregnant, i suppose im exited now but believe me, you shouldnt have to go through it at such a young age. Its HARD! im too young, but your even younger but telling my mom was the best thing i ever did. Even if you decide to abort you can still have your mom for support. She'll love you no matter what anyway. i know its a hard decision to make, ive been there, but at the end of the day its your decision. Hope this sort of helps? it is hard. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2007):

hey people.. im 15 and im pregnat.. my bf is still with me and plans on supporting me all the way, he has 3.000 saved ut the bank and says he iwll spend it on the baby, i am running away tonight bc my dad said he will beat me if he ever found out... life is hard but lieing and haveing sex b4 ur time is even harder, don't do it, i do't advise it at all... 5-55 min of plesure is NOT worth the rest of ur life in pain... thanks for listing, bye

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2007):

omg i 15 and pregnant wat should i do?my boyfriends 19 and he said i have to tell my parents . but i done no how some on please help !!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007):

hi i think u shud keep ur baby because abortion is like murder :(:( im very sorry to tell u this

i am 15 , 16 on december i think im pregnant im going down to get a test the marra

my boy is happy with the whole idea buh i am scared

as much as i would love a child i jus cant get round to tellin my parents,,pretty much like u hunni

every1 may try to judge u buh jus dont listen to them. walk round with your head held high and be thankful that you are with the right person ..(daddy)

you daddy will find it hrd to cope but dont be worried he will come round

xxxxxx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2007):

I am pregnant at 15, only 4 weeks, my period is over a week late not normal for me. i am terrified, my aunt had a baby at 15 but times were different, she was sent to a place for unmarried mothers and forced to give her baby up for adoption. I don't think she would choose this now as she dosn't ever talk about it. I met a boy on holiday we got on very well, we did use protection but it broke so we then didn't as we only had 1. I cannot decide what to do, my friends tell me that this early on you can have a jag and that gets rid of it, reading all the comments, i would keep it but i am unsure how my mum wil react, i have an older sister and she has never got herself into this, they are constantly comparing us and it makes me mad because we are so different. I totaly understand what she is going through and i wish i knew how my mum would react, i am not scared of gettin chucked out but my mum has always said that if i ever went 'off the rails' she would move me away from my friends that is what i am most scared of as they mean the world to me xox

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007):

Hi, im 15 & think im pregnant. I dunoo how i would tell my parents, they'd be SO dissapointed in me! Im taking the test tomorrow to find out. Im not with the guy i had sex with & i was pressured into it, i don't regret it though as there's no point because its over & done with. I think you should tell your parents, they'd be understanding with you, it may be easier for me to say for you to do it then do it myself.. but good luck! :)

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (19 July 2007):

eyeswideopen agony auntummm guys? She's probably already had the baby, look at the date.

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A male reader, Andy00 United Kingdom +, writes (19 July 2007):

Andy00 agony auntI'm afraid you're very wrong when you say you "can't" tell your parents, because that isn't true, and not telling them isn't going to help your situation. What is worse: Being honest, or waiting until they tell you that they think you're getting fat?

Your parents may be disappointed, but atleast they will be able to guide you on what to do next. The aftermath may mean that they keep you on a shorter leash, but maybe that's what you need right now. You obviously don't have a lot of control of yourself when you're drunk. If you want to avoid getting into this mess again then perhapps you need your parents to watch you a little more closely.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2007):

Don't worry and calm down first tell your parents they r bound 2 find out anyway so just get it over with. they r goin to b shocked at first but their love for you is unconditional so they are gonna help you get through this then your gonna have 2 sit down and have a long think about what your gonna do about it if the father doesn't know tell him and if he doesn't want 2 know then your better of without him. this baby will mean more 2 u than any thing else in the world. i know what i'm talking about as i had a baby at 14 i didn't tell my parents untill 3 months before i had her and when the father found out he dumped me for another girl and sed that he didn't want a 'silly' kid on his hands. we were both silly kids but now at 16 about to turn 17 i love my little brandy 2 bits and don't regret anything except i wish i could have waited until i was a bit older to have her as it would have been easier but theres no use looking back so down take any abuse from any one keep your chin up and walk tall.

best of luck

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2007):

I'm in the exact same boat as you!!

I'm 15, i also got drunk and went too far, i regreted it in the morning and now i've just found out im pregnant, i have no idea what to do because my mum once said when my friend fell pregnant that she was a slag and she deserves to be put on the streets because she shouldnt of dropped her pants!

My mum isnt very understanding and she grew up in a very strict family.

I don't see my dad.

And the one person i used to be able to talk to- one of my teachers, i cant no more because i've just left school!

I'm paniking so much!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2007):

hey im 15 also and my boyfriend was 19 also just like u!!! i know i couldnt tell my parents either they would kill me!! so i called some help lines and i went to a clinic, which is confadental u dont need anybody to go with u!!! and they told me my options!!! im still pregnant but im about to have an abortion so dont freak out i know its scary but theres help out there!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007):

just explain and dont say sorry as its a baby not a crime. dont worry there are plenty of other girls at your age you just need to know if your ready.

just sit your parents down and break the news to them or tell a friend or family member do not worry yourself be strong for your baby.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2007):

Hi, I am 15 and I have a 5 month old son. I was horrified to tell my mom and my dad even worse. Eventually when I was almost 4 months I told my mom, she was very upset and disappointed in my decisions in life. Eventually she was okay with the situation and respected my decision. When he was born she was so excited she cried and she loves him somuch and now I am 7 weeks pregnant, I'm with my first baby's daddy, still my mom is excited and my boyfriend and I are moving into our own apartment. I think you whould tell your parents what happened and maybe they will understand. You will enjoy being a mother, but there's those really hard times. Good luck.

Katy

Greenville, SC

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2007):

well, im 14 soon to be 15. Im pregnant. I told my dad because i needed his help. He amazingly smiled an said im here for you. And now i would never even consider abortion. Its horrible. Its murder. Take a look at some abortioned babys on teh internet. You dont want your on child going thru that. Im having a lil girl. And that baby is my world. Me n her daddy are still together and that helps a lot. but please consider all options

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2007):

I am 15 and I also think I may be pregnant, I am on birth control but i have been missing pills and having sex with my boyfriend without a comdom.

I think you should get an abortion.... if you keep the baby it will ruin your life and it willtake away the rest of the little childhood you have left.. it will be hard but it has to be done.

If you cant tell your parents.. then you still have many choices to get rid of the baby without them knowing!!

1. Most doctors will tell the parents, but it is not illegal for them to NOT!!, if they see you aremature enough to handle the situation without your parents, they will support your wishes.

2. If you have the money for an abortion, and if you have an older brother, sister, auntie, uncle, granpa, or grandma that wouldnt blow your secret they may take you to get it done,

3. I live in Austraila and in some hospitals here underage girls can get abortions for FREE!, if u go to the right hospital and have someone over 18 they can do it for free. Especially if u r a student, have a madicare card or have private health insurance.

Also i would like to say dont rush into anything!!! It may not feel like it but if you get it done u will need councilling and family support.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007):

Okay. im also 15 and i might be pregnant. i havent started in over a month. im feeling all the symptoms. but i cant tell my parents. my dad will hate me more than he does and my mom will be so disappointed. i cant hurt her. i really dont know what to do and im so scared.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2007):

i now what your goin through i mite be pregnant my self i cnt tell my mum cuz she will kick me out i dont want to get rid of it because i disagree with it but im goin to have to im so scared

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A male reader, motornut +, writes (27 October 2006):

Your parents will find out eventually, but if you cant tell them now, is there another adult you can talk to, such as older brother/sister, school teacher etc. In any case the father has broken the law as you are under age. I think i am right in saying that he can only get done if you or your parents report him , but you should serously consider this.

As for you, what you need now is plenty of support. And you will need to discuss with your parents how the baby will be cared for. They may be angry and upset at first, but once they come round to the idea, they will want to support you all thay can, you are their daughter after all.

If you really cannot talk to anyone, speaking to The samaritans will help. They will listen and understand and advise you.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2006):

Ok, first you parents wont be as shocked at the situation as you think. Yeah, there will be a lot of embarrasment and maybe some conflict at first, but at some point they will see that their daughter needs help.

If you think that they have been strict in the past it because they didnt want you in a situation where:

- you were drunk at 15

- you had sex without protection

- you were with a boy that had no future for you

I think if you look at it the real problem wasnt that you got pregnant- it was that you put yourself situations where

all sorts of things could have happened. Could you have gotten AIDS or another STD? Could this guy have jerked you around, got to move in with him and wrecked your life? It happened to tons of girls.

So getting pregnant is not the worst thing that could have happened. It seems that way, right now, and I am sympathetic.

But this was a wake up call. At this point in your life you have poor judgement. You have to face it. Use that information to make sure that you dont put yourself in this kind of situation again.

Tell your parents, put the baby up for adoption and move on wiser.

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A female reader, YAVONDA +, writes (27 October 2006):

honestly they are going to find out soon enough so u should just tell em

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2006):

You should tell them so they can help you take care of it.If you dont tell them you going to keep having that guilt on you and its bad for you baby because the thought you think go strait down to you baby.

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A female reader, uonlyliveonce United Kingdom +, writes (9 October 2006):

uonlyliveonce agony aunti hate it when people say your not legally old enough, lots of things arnt legal an were not all angels having sex isnt exactly the worlds biggest problems.

so back to your problem you do have a choice here and as much as i am against abortion it is an option and if are before 12 weeks pregnant you canget a pill from your dr's which will abort the pregnancy and you donthaveto tell your mum and dad but it would be best to tell someone coz you will probably need there emotional support.

obviously you also have the option to keep the baby, i know its scary thinking about telling your parents as i got pregnant when i was17 and there is no man scarier than my dad but they will suprise you when you tell them, you are their child and they love you so they will stand by your decision and support you im not saying they wont go crazy and be disapointed coz they will but they will come to terms with it.

if you decide to keep the baby it wont be easy and you will lose out on time with your friends but it isnt impossible and you can still make something from your life but you have to be 200% sure this is what you want and you will be happy coz you cant go back on that choice and its so much harder emotionally too when you dont have a partner in it all and im guessing if this boy is 15 he wont be very responsible and not want to know about a baby.

dont let anybody push you into anything and do whats right for you. try and tell someone if you can you need their support i know this isnt easy when your trying to cope with it on your own. get in touch with me if you need to talk i totally understand what your going through. good luck x x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2006):

ok the last thing you need is everyone jumping down ya throat so people, if your just gonna be critical and stuff whats the point because whats done is done now? Shes only ONE YEAR UNDER it, she might be close to her 16th and I know from experiance that alot of girls had sex when they were 14 most of the girls in my school did at 15 (I waited til I was legal, but thats personal choice) so everyone stop digging. I think that you should think really hard about whether you want it and should tell your parents because even if you decide to abort the support of your parents will make things the tiniest bit easier.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2006):

Don't you think telling your parents is the *least* of your worries? I mean you have a life inside you. You are far too young to be having sex, in turn becoming pregnant. This was very irresponsible. You now have the choice of whether to have this child or not. Tell your parents as soon as possible. You simply have to, as hard as it may be. Such is life. Taking responsibility for your actions. Tell them you need their support. It is only normal for them to be angry or upset and shocked at first. Just don't take more than the initial shock from them, as you don't need added stress/upset at this important time. You are just incredibly young to be a mother, but you can do this (have the baby) if you have the support around you. I believe this is the best option. It is right and taking responsibility for your choices. Don't let people convince you to take the 'easy' way out. As the easy way is rarely the right way. Take care. It will be alright.

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A female reader, bumble bee +, writes (3 October 2006):

you really need to tell your parents, they will be there for you, they will give you the emotional strength you need. im not denying they are probably going to be disappointed in you but they will want to help you.

if you cant tell your parents yourself maybe you have got an aunt or a friend who could do it with you.

good luck xXx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2006):

There is NOTHING you can do to avoid NOT telling your parents. Firstly, you aren't legal to be having sex (I'm guessing you're not Canadian), and second, you probably still live with your parents.

FIRST, you HAVE TO tell them. SECOND, you HAVE TO go to your family doctor right away. THIRD... Need some help here aunts/uncles!

Be responsible damn it!

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A female reader, ali1987 +, writes (3 October 2006):

ali1987 agony auntWell firstly you need to make a decision about your baby. You have three options, the first depends on how far gone you are but you could have a termination. Thats all im going to say on that matter as i dont believe in them but being pregnant at your age must be very difficult so who am i to judge. Secondly you can have the baby but give it up for adoption. That way it wont interfere too much with your schooling and if gives a chance for someone who is ready to be a mum but cant have children to have one. Or the third option is you keep your baby. You probably dreamt of having kids when your happily married, have your own house and money etc. But life doesnt work out as we plan. Being with the father isnt a major issue. There are plenty of single mums out there and they manage perfectly. I was brought up by just my mum and i couldnt have asked for a more loving childhood. As long as you have support from family and friends you will be fine. Which brings me on to your parents. Yes they will probably be dissapointed and yes for a while they may even be angry. But im sure your parents love you and therefore will come round to the idea of you becoming a mother and will give you all the support you need. whatever you decide to do, if you are planning on going out and having a few drinks it is always wise to carry a condom with you, we live in a modern world now and its not just the mans job. or go to your doctors and ask about other contraception. Let me know what you decide to do. my email is [email address blocked]

Best of luck

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