A
female
age
26-29,
*hunkific4ti0nx19
writes:I'll try to make this short. Ok, i'm worried and kinda just upset. i'm 12 in 7th grade and I already know about 8 people in my grade who have had sex and gotten drunk. One of them used to be a good friend of mine who actually lost their virginity when they were 8 to their cousin. She regretted it ever since, but now she keeps saying shes going to do it again after she got in hugeeeee trouble with her dad the last time. I'm worried about everyone and I didn't think i would have this drama till high school. What should i do? I have no control over the 8th graders. One of the worst parts is none of the people are even boyfriend and girlfriend or really like each other. They just go and have sex with whoever they feel like for the enjoyment of it. I think this is reallly bad and it's just going to get worse and worse.
View related questions:
cousin, drunk Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, esepalo1 +, writes (28 December 2007):
 Dont rush your still young be different be a leader not a follower the people you know doing this have no respect for themselves you should at your age that should be the least of youe worrys focus on school and your education not what the people around you are doing be the odd ball you dont want a STD at your much less a baby dont be pressured into what the whole schools doing be your own individual self and respect your self.People can be mean once the word gets out if you do have sex people will start talking bad and you dont want that just think if your parents found out at your age your having sex it would be worse if you got pregnant then what no job still living with your parent no car for appontments lots of responsability to deal with at your age so wait till you get older and have fun being young.LIFE IS SHORT LIVE IT TO THE FULLEST YOU STILL YOUNG.PS i was a virgin till i was 19 im glad i waited.
A
female
reader, xxbaybeegal  +, writes (28 December 2007):
 Its so good that your thinking this way but there isnt really anything you can do. those people having sex at a young age are only having sex because everyone else, some of them have sex because they think they are grown up, and some of them do it because they are being *peer pressured*. im sure most of them will regret this when they are older and think back to the time when they had sex. i hope you do the right thing snd stay out of the *in crowd*gd luckxxxx
...............................
A
female
reader, VickyLou +, writes (25 December 2007):
Most of the people who say they have sex wouldn't have done to be honest. And even if a few of them have, they would only boast about it so much because they feel stupid and regret it. You shouldn't have to do anything you don't want to just because of peer pressure.
...............................
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (24 December 2007):
 I just had to make a slight correction. Here in the United States, it is considered incest and is against statutes as intimate family relations, something about the increased possibility of birth defects.
Now to answer the question. We live in a world where people act many different ways. People have different beliefs, and different morals about their behavior and what they accept for themselves. You don't have control over the 8th graders and you really shouldn't try to take on the burden of trying too yourself. The one person and behaviors you have control over is your own. Be proud every day that you are living against what others seem to think is popular and hold yourself up to a higher standard of behavior. That is something to really take pride with and your parents should be proud raising a child with a higher level of morals. Keep doing what your doing, those who don't want to have the other lifestyle might just follow with you.
...............................
A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (24 December 2007):
 Leanne it is not illegal for first cousins to have sex, so therefore it does not count as incest.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2007): most of them will be lying very few people have sex before 16
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): Awww...that's sweet that you care about all these people - but unfortunately you can't just stop them or force them to change their minds about this sort of thing.
Your poor friend...She probably didn't even know what she was doing back then. Perhaps the only thing to do is sit them down alone and tell them that you are really worried about them....but there's not much more that you can do.
You keep going on with your life and making the right decisions. Be proud of being a virgin - I know that I am!
Good luck. Have a great christmas too!! =] x x x
...............................
A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (23 December 2007):
 Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to control the behaviour of your fellow students but you have a good head on your shoulders and the others could learn something from your way of thought. you are far too yound to be having sex, and as for your friend who had sex at 8, that is wrong for so many reasons, it is illegal to have sex with a member of your family, incest is not acceptable. second cousins are perfectly legal but not immediate forst cousins. but that isn't the worst thing. at 8 years old your body isn't devoeloped for having sex, she must have been in a great deal of pain and i am not suprised her dad went mental.
follow your instintcs, you know that just because others are "doing it" doesn't mean you have to jump on the band wagon. it isn't a competition and if you wait until you are older an din a happy loving relationship, you will feel so much better and it will be natural and not forced. like you say, the kids in your grade are not in love, they do it to be what they presume is cool but it is stupid.
take care, you appear sensible and i commend you for that.
...............................
|
