A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my girlfriend for some time now and lately we have been talking about important events in the future e.g. do we want to get married, have kids etc. Well we both like to have children but marriage hasn't been talked about much.My question is if me and my gf do have children out of wedlock and we split up, what rights do I have as a father? I live in the UK and more than financially secure, but would I ever be able to prevent my gf from leaving the country with my child if such a thing happened?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2006): In the Uk from 2001 I think - I would have to check the date to be exactly sure but anyway froma around 2000/01 if you have a child outside of marriage the law has changed it used to be that only married fathers had any parental rights that has now changed. If a couple jointly register the birth and your name goes on the birth certificate you automatically assume parental responsibility. You have financial responsiblitites to the child but you also have many rights which where previously unheard of you can have joint or even sole custody of your child in extreme cases, you have a say in your childs education medical treatment etc you also have a say in were your child resides so providing the mother of your child isnt a national of a country not signed up to the hague convention she just cant take your child away. A word of advice though keep a record of when and where any regular contact takes place and have receipts for financial support given in case of a relationship breakdown as these could be essential for any custody or access case.
I do think that if this is the way you are thinking b4 a baby is even conceived its maybe not the right choice for you good luck.
I would offer one more word of caution the laws in Scotland are slightly different if this is where you live - check the exact situation
A
female
reader, kk +, writes (2 September 2006):
hi hun, what you could do is seek advice from a solicitor and maybe get joint custody, so you have peace of mind that if the worse came to the worst and you split up you would have equal rights, me and my boyfriend did this and we did split for a year and my daughter still saw him on a regular basis and no bond between them was lost, now were back together :-) hope this helps xx
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A
male
reader, Green Eyed Gabriel +, writes (2 September 2006):
 Yes you can as long as your on the birth certificate, you could take her to court if she tried to take your child out of the country. And I'm almost certain being financially secure you'd be able to win.
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