A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating this girl for 6 months now. We meet up only once a week but we keep communication open the everyday. From our 1st to 5th month I was a jealous, possessive person, and I would get really suspicious make a big deal out of it if she talks to a guy friend. But then also I was really into her... I now know that I was just infatuated.Just recently (around 2 weeks ago) I've started to feel different. Like my feelings towards her have weakened... the positive things and even the negative things like jealousy and insecurity. I thought I was getting bored of her, and I got really sad because I really wanted our relationship to work out. But we've been doing different things to keep the spice in our relationship, so I thought that it might not be boredom.The other possibility would be falling out of love... But I was never in love right? Or was I???I wanna know what I'm feeling and what I should do. I really wanna be with this person. I want her to stay as a big part in my life. But I'm afraid of being her boyfriend for the wrong reasons, and that is being afraid of hurting her feelings if I decide to break up. I wanna make the best decision for the both of us, even if it means breaking up. But I dunno if I should break up or not. I get really frustrated with myself sometimes because of this.What do you think is going on with me? Is there still hope? PS: I've told her about this twice. She cried the first time, but the 2nd time we were able to talk about it. And we decided that we should wait and see... If I really am liking her less, then we should just break up.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2008): I think you could have been in love with her just because you are young dosen't mean its infatuation.. but being that you are young you could just be feeling tied to one person have you ever thought maybe you want to see the outside world before you actually settled down? I say brake up be friends and if you decide you really love and miss her it will always work out.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (25 August 2008):
Only you can tell what you are feeling I'm afraid, but since you are so young it is a lot more likely to be infatuation and obsession than real love.
If you have got over your infatuation then perhaps you could just go back to being friends. But if she really likes you then it may just hurt her to be friends in the long run as she will always be hoping for more.
The fact you have spoken to her about it is good. The next time you see her and spend the day with her then just see if you are happier when you are being friends, or when doing the girl/boy stuff. Do you want her body or do you enjoy being with her mind?
Really think about it but don't tell her that you are or she'll feel pressured to perform all day.
Good Luck!! xx
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