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If I can't go away from her I continue to hurt myself, what should I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Faded love, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 February 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 5 March 2009)
A male India age 30-35, anonymous writes:

she is my friend from since 8 months, the bond of our relationship was so strong that i could feel her pain, her feelings, i used to solve her problems, one day i proposed her only to find no on her side. she never changed her attitude towards me, rather our friendship grew more stronger. i got so much caught up in her that i used to get dreams of her every night, now she likes someone else. i gave her a letter to tell her how much i love her and care for her but she show no response. i go to teach her to her house only to see her every day. i am not able to take her out of my mind. i can't hurt her by leaving in between her studies. but, if i cannot go away from her i am hurting myself what should i do ?

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A female reader, helphelp77 United Kingdom +, writes (5 March 2009):

It's always hard when you like someone and the feelings aren't reciprocated and i can imagine this is really difficult for you.

If you are finding it really impossible to be a friend to her then maybe you need to reevaluate the situation and your friendship. I'm sure she would not want you to be hurting because of her. If i were you (although i do not know the ins and outs of the situation), i would do my best to carry on being friends with her. However, if i was unable to block my feelings/read into her actions then i would perhaps cool the friendship for a small amount of time/ take a bit of space.

If you decide to do this then i think it would be best for you to explain to her the reasons why, and that you are doing it for the good of your friendship. Either way if this is making you unhappy then perhaps you need to sacrifice her friendship for the time being, or atleast discuss it with her. If she is a true friend, she'll understand.

Good luck!

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A female reader, kellyxxx United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2009):

kellyxxx agony auntBe a friend to her! Just because she does not like you in a romantic way does not mean you can't be friends! Be a man and stop acting so selfish, I know you are feeling pain but she needs a friend! X

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