A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:There is a man at work (different departments, we don't see each other every day) that I have been friendly with the past few months and I believe there has been a spark going on (for sure it has for me, not completely sure about his side). Yesterday he asked me for a hug which I was only too happy to give. Just a quick one, no groping. I don't want to read too much into this and get my hopes up, but if a guy asks a woman for a hug, is it reasonable to think he might be romantically inclined towards her? Or do men ask for hugs just as friendly tokens? Thank you for any feedback!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2008): You guys are amazing!As a guy let me give you the real answerIf a guy asks you for a hug it means helikes you. Period. Don't look for hiddenmeanings or whatever. He hugged you he likesyou.In this day of sexual harassment lawsuitsetc if a guy has the nerve to ask you for ahug he :a. has definite interestb. is hoping that you feel the same and that iswhy he is asking for a hugc. is trying to be respectful instead of just walking up and hugging youif u like the guy and u say you do don't messaround with some imaginary time limitnext time u want to hug him and its an appropriatespot like the breakroom with noone around or somethingwalk up to him, tell him thanx for the hug the otherday and could you have one from himI guarrantee that will answer your question!
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (29 January 2008):
 He could be flirting with you or just being friendly.Nothing concrete here unless he is game to ask you for a date.
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A
male
reader, jm81690  +, writes (29 January 2008):
 A hug can be either one really, it's really hard to say.
Did you get the impretion he was being flirtacious when he asked for the hug? If so, he probably was.
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A
female
reader, nicole5178 +, writes (29 January 2008):
 It could or it could not. Different people have different personal space limits. For example, if I hug someone, that means that I love them romantically--I don't hug friends or family (I'm part of an extreme, I guess). There are also people who hug for random accomplishments, like finishing an assignment successfully or ahead of schedule or something (I'm trying to give a workplace example....)
It really depends on the context. If it was your birthday, and he said "Happy Birthday!" and gave you a hug, that's nothing. If he said, "Ugh, I'm having the worse day ever. Could you hug me?", then he would have meant it in a friendly way. But if he was staring at you and then asked for a hug while commenting about how wonderful you are, he intended it to be romantic.
My advice would be to ask him for a hug in about a week or so and see how he reacts. Not randomly, though; wait for an opportunity. Don't rush things.
...Hope that helps you. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, doafreak +, writes (29 January 2008):
 I think it could go either way but most guys don't hug as just a freindly gesture.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (29 January 2008):
 From here, it's hard to tell whether this hug means more than it seems to mean. Perhaps the body language or the circumstances of the hug would help me to have a better opinion.
If the hug was the natural result of your conversation, then I don't think it means more than that. But, if the hug was, say, "unnecessary", then perhaps he meant more.
I also need to mention that I find it harder to give you an opinion because I come from a culture where hugs and personal contact are far more frequent than seems to be the case in the United States. And more than that: where I live, you say hello or goodbye to the women you know with a kiss on the cheek. And it means nothing but "hello" or "goodbye". Perhaps I'm not the best person to give an opinion on this matter.
And then, there's another point. When you're attracted to someone and you can't tell the person, you tend to "read" signs in a favorable light. I know that you want to be sure of what you see, and that's the reason of your question. See if the man is doing something that is not what every person would do. If he does, chances are he is interested, too.
Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, Namatjira  +, writes (29 January 2008):
Sometimes a guy will ask for a hug from a person he is interested in. If he is a caring person then he may also offer a hug to someone he thinks is feeling down. Sometimes he might just be miserable and need a boost. So many factors can affect it.
I think that many guys are too embarrassed to ask for a hug. It just isn't manly they think.
In this world where everybody gets too hung up on their own problems, a few more hugs can help. However be careful not to read too much into it. As guys are generally really bad at interpreting body language, why not come straight out and ask him? Even if his reaction is no, you never know when he has had a chance to think about it he might realise that it should be yes, that he does have feelings.
At the very least you will be true to yourself and that is never a bad thing.
All the best
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