A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I am a 29 year old man who has never been married or anywhere near that point. The problem is well i have this friend who i talk to every single day before i go to work. She makes me smile and we flirt like crazy. The problem is that she is married. I told her that i had a crush on her and she told me that she had one on me also, but because she is married, we are just going to keep things like they are, us just being friends. What do i do? How do i go about putting my feelings on hold. I respect our friendship and would never want to be 'the other guy';
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crush, flirt Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (14 April 2008):
 Know where the boundaries are and do not cross them.
You can still joke and have light flirting but make sure you
do not have any physicals or set yourself up and fall into the trap.
Flirting is harmless as long as you know your limits.
A
female
reader, Annalisa  + ♥, writes (14 April 2008):
 Your feelings have been allowed to spark by being friends and flirting with a married woman. This is always a bad idea, because single men are useless at 'just being friends' with women, unless the woman in question is ugly and unattractive!
You've got a crush on each other, so being friends at this stage will be impossible. You just need to get some distance between the two of you, stop talking and flirting out of work hous. Don't flirt with her! Just get on with your life and meet other women.
If you think it's hard, it'll be because you don't want to, but it's actually quite simple.
God bless you and good luck!
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A
female
reader, LittleTwoLegs  +, writes (14 April 2008):
 If you think you can carry on in a friendly manner then you should feel fine and comfortable to flirt, and not feel guilty about finding joy in her company. If it gets to the point where you don't think you can find the patience any more or that you really start obsessing over her you might want to take some time away. It doesn't necessarily have to be perminant, but you have to do it for the both of you, to try and regroup and discontinue centering your affections around her. I don't think that in this case forcing yourself to see other people will make it better, but do keep an open mind and always remind yourself that you have no desire to jeopardize such a valuable and unique friendship as you've found with her.
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