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I would like to try sex with him - secretly

Tagged as: Friends with Benefits, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 October 2017) 4 Answers - (Newest, 27 October 2017)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My question is I met this guy, a friend of a friend, am a virgin, I would like to have sex with him. Should I ask my friend to ask him, or should I ask him? I would only like fwb. I have fantasy's. am not gay. I wouldn't want this to get out.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (27 October 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntYou have gay fantasies. You are gay or bisexual. It really is that simple, OP.

Also, people are not your sex toys to experiment with. Find a male escort and pay for the experience. It's confidential (usually) and tell them you want to be gradually introduced to it.

You need to come to terms with the fact that you are gay, to some degree, whether you like it or not, and you can't use people for sex. At least find someone who only wants sex and tell them you need someone to experiment with, but do it safely.

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A male reader, TylerSage United States +, writes (27 October 2017):

TylerSage agony auntWhy not? Go for it. Provided you two are both single. Don't think you should let too many people in on this little request however. Good luck.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (26 October 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntAre you really in your late 30s? You sound like someone who is just a young adult exploring and not knowing where to turn to?

Anyway you have met a guy great. If you would like to have sex with him then firstly you should ask him how he feels about that. Do not involve your friend that is something a teenager does not an adult. Ask him yourself and see how he responds, be open and honest tell him you are looking for sex nothing else, and that you are a virgin. When you say you are not gay does that mean you are bisexual? Labels aside as that does not matter ask him and see what he has to say, although most people don't like being used for sex or being kept a secret.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (26 October 2017):

Honeypie agony auntIf you ONLY want to experiment, WHY ask someone who is a friend of a friend? Why not use one of this many hook-up apps instead?

And If this is the guy you want to try and have your first encounter with, have the guts to ASK him directly.

Is the friend of a friend a gay man? If so, do you realize that it's NOT his job to be your sexual guinea pig? MAybe he ISN'T into casual sex. Or bi-sexual men. Or men who are in denial.

Personally? I think if you want to try sex with a man, you shouldn't MUCK up friendships by going through THEIR friends for a hook-up.

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