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I woke up naked in bed with my girlfriend's sister and I had not even been drinking! Should I tell my girlfriend?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 September 2010) 7 Answers - (Newest, 21 September 2010)
A male Zambia age 30-35, *oxana writes:

i woke up naked in bed with my girlfriend's sister.i got no memories on how this happened.all can remember is that i was invited to her birtday party.by her sister i had two soft drinks and thats it.should i tell my girlfriend about it or should i keep quiet?

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A female reader, xX_Kitty_Xx United Kingdom +, writes (21 September 2010):

Perhaps your drink and your girlfriends drink was spiked either by your girlfriends sister or someone at the party ? Perhaps someone whoose jelous of you and your girlfriend ? That's all I can think of ... Hope this helps (: x

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A male reader, Roxana Zambia +, writes (10 September 2010):

Roxana is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i would like 2 say thanks for the good advirse.i told my girlfriend and she too said she didnt know how she got home or remember what hapened at the party..we decided to seek 4 answers from her sister..evrybody is saying.we wer in the best of mode at the party and there was nothing to be suspicious about.the sister said i insisted on being with her for the night and kising her.thats all she remembers how we got to my place and naked nobody knows.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010):

Apart from the obvious, where was your girlfriend, as it was her sister's birthday...it concerns me that you have more than likely been drugged. Either your girlfriends sister, or someone else intended to abuse your trust and spike your drink.

Firstly they had no idea (IF you were drugged) what effect that would have on you, but the fact someone has clearly taken advantage of you. As you don't mention IF your girlfriend was due at the party, or perhaps she is away at college, but something is missing in this jigsaw puzzle. I wonder if your girlfriend was aware of what was going to happen, that in fact she was part of the ' joke ' as it seems very strange she would not attend.

Some thoughts for you to ponder:

1) Do you really want to have a relationship with someone who's family consider it acceptable to take advantage of you when you obviously don't drink, by spiking your drinks?

2) If your girlfriend is privy to this joke,test, as in she may want to SEE if you would tell her the TRUTH, that you were naked in bed with her sister ( when she already was part of it)would she be somebody you would want to trust and date?

3) If your girlfriend is NOT part of this abuse of your TRUST by her family - then why not tell her how you found yourself in bed with her sister after being drugged. YOU have not done anything wrong, remember this, you have been taken advantage off, and you have no idea what her sister did whilst you were under the influence of whatever it was.

The act is itself is quite serious - again, IF you have been drugged, if that were to happen out to some female and she found herself in bed naked, there would be uproar, the guy (s) who drugged her would be up for prosecution, don't let the fact you are a guy, and it was at your girlfriends birthday party, mask the seriousness of what has happened.

I hope you manage to resolve this, and I'm sorry this happened to you.

Jilly

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A female reader, blahblahblahh United Kingdom +, writes (10 September 2010):

blahblahblahh agony auntAre you suggesting that you were drugged? Or are you mentaly blocking out the memory because of guilt? You should tell her, you can't keep that from her regardless of what happened that night. If you seriously think you were drugged then you have to investigate in to that, maybe it's a good idea to do that first.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010):

if you were drugged then you can bet there are pictures....yep you better tell her.

It was your gf's birthday party? Where was your gf?

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A male reader, Cerberus_Raphael United Kingdom +, writes (10 September 2010):

Cerberus_Raphael agony auntI saw your previous post from a couple of days ago. Now you have gone too far by no fault of your own, assuming your claim is true. Yes, you should tell your girlfriend.

And what has your girlfriend's sister done? How did she react when she saw you? You should not keep this from your girlfriend who is having your child. She needs to know that this happened and you don't remember how. Where was she during the birthday party? Can you remember that?

I hope that helps.

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A male reader, Kenj United Kingdom +, writes (10 September 2010):

Kenj agony auntMaybe your drinks were drugged?

It depends how guilty you feel about the whole thing, you risk loosing your girlfriend if you tell her but if you keep it quiet now and she finds out later then it will be a lot worse.

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