A
female
age
51-59,
*itty40
writes:Hi me and my hubby are both 39.We have children from past relationships but i really want one with him before its to late.I did a home ovulation test and its fine and ive been to the doc for blood test, that was fine too.My hubbys home test came back neg low sperm count.He was ment to give a sperm sample to the hospital,but want do it.We got lots of pills from internet to boost sperm count,hes not taken them.When i try to talk to him he just wants to argue with me.This is tearing me up inside.Do you think he is just having a laugh with me and waiting until im too old to have anymore.Im now thinking that i should move on and be happy with someone else, coz if he loved me he would talk about this with me.What should i do x
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008): Having read through your question again, it's occurred to me that you don't just want a baby with your husband, you simply want a baby with whoever will give you one. Why else would you consider moving on to be happy with someone else?
Another thing I can't quite figure out - if he's had children previously his sperm count must be ok - unless the mother of his children went somewhere else to get pregnant.
A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (21 October 2008):
 Hi,
I feel Uncle Phil has hit the nail on the head here. It should be the two of you that want a baby, not just one. If you had never had children before I would say he is being unreasonable, and maybe you should move on to a man that wants the same.
But as it is, I feel you are being a little selfish. He clearly doesnt want to start again with a young family, as you have both done this already. You probably have a very nice and cozy life, so look at it from his point of veiw "Why should it change". Also do you think that little of him that if he wont comply with your demands, you would leave him???
Think about it seriously, it doesnt sound very fair.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008): I really get the vibes that you're the only one that wants a baby. He's not having a laugh and neither is he waiting until you're too old. I think he simply doesn't want another baby to ruin his cosy little lifestyle.
A baby should be wanted equally by both parents, and you'd be silly to try to force this upon him if he's against it - and I feel sure that's how it is.
What should you do? Buy a puppy. After about 15 years it won't cost you anything, but in the intervening years you won't have quite so much disruption and mess, and unlike a teenager it won't answer you back or get moody, it will give you a warm welcome when you get home and always be totally dedicated to you. All you have to do is feed it, walk it and clean up after it, but it will always love you unconditionally. A lot cheaper to keep too.
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A
female
reader, VictoriaK  +, writes (21 October 2008):
 Well, first off how many children does he have of his own? Maybe he's doesn't want anymore children because of past drama with an ex wife, that he doesnt want with you. But, if you really want to have a baby, then I suggest you take a look at WHY you want this baby, and if you'd be financially able to care for a child, the economy is really rough right now, maybe he's scared he wont be able to provide for a child right now. Maybe you could bring it up during a "quiet" time for both of you, maybe dim the lights to make it seem less like an interrogation. Sorry, if I wasnt much of a help. Keep us posted! Good Luck, Best Wishes!
Victoria~
P.S. If you need to talk, feel free to message me anytime :)
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