A
female
age
22-25,
Jen86
writes:Hi. I want to look more feminine for my boyfriend but I don't know how. I'm 22 so i should know but I don't. Usually I wear jeans and t shirts sometimes a skirt but I look really fat and horrible and don't feel at all girly. I'm a size 14/16 and have quite big boobs so i try to hide my body as best I can. Usually by borrowing his t shirts but they make me look like a bloke! i don't wear make upn as I'm allergic to all types especially hypoallergenic ones. Can anyone giive any advice? I have pale skin and dark brown hair and eyes if this helps. ps I HATE PINK
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2008): You should definitely wear purple as it will present you as more feminine and also shows that you're sexually frustrated and I'm sure he wouldn't mind removing the tension.
Also, because you obviously have eyes, and you hate pink,
you should buy some red framed glasses!
I don't really know if they help,
but red shirts make your boobs bigger and I figured boobs are pretty feminine, so maybe wearing red glasses would make your face... better.
In summary;
purple = sexually frustrated
pink = bad
boobs = feminine
red shirts = big boobs
big boobs = good!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): There's a differnece between "girly" and "feminine" and with the latter it's often the little touches that count.
You can still wear your trousers or jeans, but keep them to a flattering cut (bootleg for example). Also remember that fitted clothes that skim the body are far more flattering on a larger frame than baggy shapeless ones (which just make you look bigger). High neck shirts, contrary to what you might think, tend to make big boobs look even bigger - whilst you don't have to show off everything yu've got, a single breasted blouse with the top few buttons oven, or a simple v-neck wrap top will be doing you more favours than your boyfriend's t-shirts.
You can look womanly without ever having to go near a dress or heels or anything pink if you accesorise well. Try the following:
- make it a rule to never go out without painting your toenails. It's easier than painting fingernails and will show that you take good care of yourself. Buy a selection of three or four polishes on colours you like and alternate regularly.
- Get your eyebrows shaped professionally - it really does make a difference to your face, even if you don't wear any make-up at all.
- Get a good haircut and take time to style it properly - add decorative clips and bands sometimes.
- wear jewelery - it needn't be ostentatious. Bangles are cheap and fun, rings are so close to your skin you barely notice them, a simple rope of beads makes jeans and t-shirt look instantly more glamourous.
- Invest in sexy underwear. Get over any notion that sexy = uncomfortable. First of all get measured and make sure you ahve your size correct - then visit a department store or lingerie shop and see what you can find - whether it's a bit of lace and silk, or something in PVC (!). The point of this isn't just to impress your b/f in the bedroom (though lord knows it doesn't hurt) but to help you view yourself as a sexy, feminine and glamourous woman. (For what it's worth, women of your size, with their glorious curves, generally look far better in their scanties than women my size (8-10) )
- Experiment with dresses by wearing them OVER jeans - this is great if you're self-concious about your legs - and very fashionable right now. A colourful mini dress will look very feminine over a pair of bootleg blue jeans but still leave you feeling covered up.
- Pretty shoes needn't be high heeled or impractical - and can instantly turn a boyish outfit into a feminine one - look out for beaded flip flops and ballet slippers to lighten up your look.
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A
female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (21 July 2008):
 I understand because I don't even suit pink, it clashes with my skin as I am very pale!
People do think you have to wear pink and lilac etc to be girly, some girls wear these colours and others don't.
I think it's about dressing for different occasions. I am very comfortable in combat pants and wearing khaki. When required for socials I can do a skirt and a top and it does make me feel different. I usually clump about in trainers or practical shoes, so I wear flat shoes and I have a sparkly pair of shoes that are flat for when the need arises.
I always like my earrings and a necklace and bracelet. Make-up is a must for socials but not always on an everyday basis, and I can suprise myself how I look sometimes believe it or not.
Fitted top or shirt is a good option with a skirt or trousers.
Fiona.
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A
female
reader, Tigger3165  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 I have always been the same way... t-shirt and jeans... but i started working in retail... and i had to dress in a more feminine way... and i realized that i can be comfortable and girly... i found that a nice FITTED shirt makes all the difference in the world... and don't be afraid to show some cleavage...
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Sounds like you have fun relationship, you probably don't need to do much to change yourself, really. He's obviously very attracted to you the way you are and there's nothing wrong with wearing t-shirts and jeans!
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A
female
reader, Jen86 +, writes (21 July 2008):
Jen86 is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni don't wanna excite him just look nice for him for a change. I have tried every make up imaginable including mineral but theyt don't like me at all. The reason I hide my boobs is they're naturaly huge! 36f! I hate the fact they're that big. When I was a teenager and i just got them, I always got teased about them by my entire family including my parents! Cruel bastards. I'd much rather myt boyfriend look me in the eye that at m chest. Although he is a cheeky git who will pull my top out so he can get a peek. Mind you I do pull his boxers down so i can see his bits but he always starts it!
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A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker + ♥, writes (21 July 2008):
 Do you want to look "girly", or do you want to excite him? Because for most men (well, for me anyway!) it's not the same thing at all.
"Girly" is soft colours and loose, flowing clothes that suggest but don't show or reveal. Nice, but not a thrill. Exciting is tighter, darker, more revealing - black skirt a bit above the knee not too tight but not too loose either, tight teeshirt with plunging and revealing neckline. Definitely not the "tomboy" look - make the most of those female curves; make them powerful; assert your femaleness in a way he can't ignore!
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A
female
reader, DiovanLestat +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Jen you better come back and update, Uncle Phil's having all kinds of thoughts now, he just wants to make sure you look alright...
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A
female
reader, Jen86 +, writes (21 July 2008):
Jen86 is verified as being by the original poster of the questiona agree with uncle phil oldersister. Sorry
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (21 July 2008):
Hey now, Uncle Phil, hot pink is one of my favorite colors and I apply it liberally! And I'm no little girl....
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A
female
reader, °Ale°  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Well, if you're not that girly then you might not want to skirts. Besides, they don't work for a lot of body types (and lets not forget the legs situation) so I would strongly suggest some nice fitted jeans and a top that's also fitted around your chest (because if you got boobs, show them!) and loose around your tummy. That style is very flattering, I would also recommend jewelry- long necklaces and bracelets. As far as make up goes, have you tried mineral powders? as well as color minerals? you should.
Stay gorgeous :)
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A
male
reader, Uncle_Phil +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Pink is for little girls, not grown women, unless you're called Barbara Cartland.
There's absolutely nothing wrong being a size 14/16 with big boobs. Most blokes would kill for a woman that size. I was reading in the Daily Mail today that women see themselves as being 20% bigger than others see them. Maybe you're over-estimating how you look to others?
If you've got big boobs show them off without being too tarty about it. Leave something to the imagination but show some cleavage. Any clothing with vertical stripes will make you look thinner. If you wear jeans make sure they're of the stretchy tight-on-the-arse-and-legs variety. One of those wide belts hanging loosely around your waist will make it appear smaller and accentuate your hips. Much better to wear a skirt at this time of year. As for colours, who really cares about the colour as long as it looks reasonable on you? Any bright and cheerful colour will do.
Half the battle of 'being feminine' is attitude. If you think of yourself as being a dowdy drudge, you'll give off that impression to others. Put a bright and cheerful smile on your face to match your clothing and you'll be well away!
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A
female
reader, Jen86 +, writes (21 July 2008):
Jen86 is verified as being by the original poster of the questioncheers guys. I'll give it a go. Yes he fell in love with a tomboy but every girl likes to be a bit girly now and then. I've never had the urge to actually try and look pretty before. Saying that i've never been with anybody worth the effort really. I'll try al of your sugestions and tell you what he thinks.
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A
female
reader, xxkissxx +, writes (21 July 2008):
hey chicks,
your boyfriend im sure loves you the way that you are but if you want to go for more feminine why dont you go for pastel colors i used to be a tomboy but iv started wearing light pastel colours and this has really helped my confidence as i no lomger feel like a tom boy,
but change yourself for the you and no one else as you are your own person,
hope this has helped x
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers + ♥, writes (21 July 2008):
I hate pink too, and I'm inseparable from my jeans, but I do like dressing up now and then and seeing the look on my hubbies face when I wander past looking all pretty.
If you are a 14 to 16 and have curves then you need to learn how to make the most of them. You can wear jeans but how about something a little more low cut on top, and a belt around your waist to show your figure.
The other thing you could try is dresses. 50's dresses are very in and you can buy ones that are quite well covering up top if you are nervous. They also show off your shape but then flair out so hide your bum and legs if you are self concious.
It says you are in the UK so I suggest you watch How To Look Good Naked on channel 4. It's all about women who wear their boyfriends baggy clothes because they think they have a horrible body. It'll teach you about what to wear for your shape and give you ideas.
Here's the website:http://www.channel4.com/life/microsites/H/htlgn/
Go shopping and try things on, that is your best bet.
As for make up you may have to get a bit more creative. EG. Your lips can be stained with cherry or strawberry juice to make them look red very naturally, you could probably use it for blusher too. You'd have to do some research to see if anything could be used as eyeshaddow.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  + ♥, writes (21 July 2008):
 Before you do this, are you sure you boyfriend wants you to do this? My gf is a real tomboy and I love her for it and would hate it if she changed.
You boyfriend fell in love with you a "non-girly" woman. What you might not know is the tomboy's can be far more feminine then women plastered with make-up. Maybe it is the contrast.
Consider that you might not be the only one who hates pink in your relationship. If he loves you for who you are, why change?
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (21 July 2008):
Well, color has little to do with femininity unless you are a newborn so don't feel forced to wear any particular one- your just looking to accentuate your best qualities with color, not so other people can determine your gender.
It's really going to depend on your skin's undertones and most people fall into different categories being a spring, summer, fall or winter. I think the fall colors are probably a safe bet or darker colors for your tops if you want to minimize how big your breasts are. You can get loose clothing to be more comfortable and there are many dresses you can buy that are the one size fits all and meant to be worn loosely.
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A
female
reader, PsyCookie + ♥, writes (21 July 2008):
 First of all, I want to say this: Pink does not neceseraly mean girly!
You can be girly without wearing pink. There are many things that make a woman look more womanly, and the main thing is a dress.
You have to find cloths that suit your body shape. Being "fat" does not mean you will not be attractive. My friend, who is a size 11, is considered by many gorgeous and sexy because she has curves, she has managed to dress according to her body, and her face is just gorgeous.
Some things that make a woman girly are: blouses, skirts, and dresses. Jeans are also considered sexy if you wear the right pair. Also an arrange of colors will make you girlier, not just wearing pink. Of course, man t-shirts are a big no no and man jeans would do worse to your body shape, even when you think they're comfy.
Like I said before, you have to wear clothes that suit your body shape because every woman is different. Curvilinear! Magazine is aimed towards more curvier woman and you could check the magazine for fashion tips. Also, there are a lot of stores that focus on young curvy women, Like Torrid and Lane Bryant. You could check their catalogs for fashion tips as well.
Good luck and have fun!
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A
female
reader, hlskitten + ♥, writes (21 July 2008):
 Hi
What about white Brouderie anglais, i dont think thats spelt right, but you know what i mean. Thats real femanine, but not pink. I dont get why you are hiding the boobs. Flaunt them girl! 14-16 is average size here in the Uk. Jeans can look lovely and femanine if you have a pretty top on and a nice chain round the neck? Doesn't have to be pink.
C xxxx
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A
female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii +, writes (21 July 2008):
 okay
wear a really nice floaty skirt and a nice top (this is working for me today. my boyfriend is loving it ) it doesn't have to be really long, but something patterned or floaty. don't try to hide your body!!!!
hope this helps (:
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