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I want to know what experiences people have with age-gap relationships...

Tagged as: Age differences<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 July 2005) 87 Answers - (Newest, 13 July 2008)
A , Tabbie writes:

I don't really have a problem..(well i do, but thats a dif. story..lol) Anywho, I just want to know if there is anyone out there that is dating or married to someone with an age difference of over 15 years,and if so what makes it work and what dosent work, just basically looking for any advice you might be able to provide to people having trouble with an age difference problem. thank you for your time in advance. its greatly valued.

Cheers,

Tabbie

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008):

I'm 18 and I'm dating a 34 year old. We've been dating for a year now and I haven't told ANYBODY because my family won't approve AND! he's my father's friend. his family and friends; however, approve and is very supportive.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2008):

if you're in love it doesnt matter,as long as your're happy in life cos lifes too short to worry,whats the point,just be happy!!! im with someone 19years older but i forget that sometimes when im with him cos im so happy!!!x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2008):

i cant belive the comments made by an anonymus female september the 11th ,my boyfriends 50 and im 27 why would he be a pervert ?am i 5?no im a grown woman who knows what i want and knows my own mind also he is no] taking advantage either and doesnt have a wrinkly bum ,the only reason she hasnt got an older boyfriend is because she is far to immature to attract 1 x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2008):

my boyfriend and i have a 31yr age gap. apart from the comments and looks we receive (people think we're father and daughter until we show one another affection) things work great for us. I think he enjoys having a young, vibrant partner around to keep him on his toes. we've been together for 2 years and have the occasional spat but nothing that a couple without an age gap wouldn't have as well. apart from not wanting to go out with my friends very often, and the fact that he doesnt enjoy parties or staying out too late, he's still sociable and young at heart.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008):

A mate of mine dated a lad who was only 16 while she was 38 at the time. To be honest as long as its legal its fine. I worked with a woman in her late 40's also who's boyfriend was about 23. I got on well with these people and I find it childish that some people feel that its 'gross' or 'not right', after all its not their relationship. My sister is married to a man old enough to be her father and shes landed a great catch. He's a good father to her child and responsible and they have fun together. That far better than my Nephew's biological father who was the same age, sat unemployed while taking drugs and took all my sisters savings for himself. Age gap doesnt matter its whether or not the person is decent.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2008):

Hi.

Its nice to see comments from people that can make it work esp as there are so many negative comments. I have been seeing my older man for nearly six years. I am 22 he is 46, and we have been seeing each other since I was 16. He looks old for his age but that means nothing to me as I love him completely. People used to stare when i was younger but these days people dont, or we have stopped noticing. My mum has been so supportive. Its true you cant help who you fall in love with. I just am so glad that I didnt ignore these feelings, as I would be missing out on the best relationship of my life. There is a strong bond and this was what brought us togethe. I have also accepted he comes as a package with his children (15 and 17) and he understands I will still want children. These are the two important topics because quite often the older partner will have been married and/or had children. If you discuss this then there will never be any confusion and you should be happy with only the problems any other couple could/would face!

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (6 June 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntHaving just read the comments from anonymous female dated June 5th we just had to add our input.Although we would agree that Age Gap Relationships can have specific problems related to the age difference, they are basicaly the same as any other relationship. Without respect and understanding, love and caring there is no relationship. Honesty and openess between partner's is a must. Things dont just go bad over night.If you have good communication between your selfs you can sort out the little things before they grow into problems. There is a point of no return in any relationship. It takes two to tango for sure!

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A male reader, WastedLife United States + , writes (5 June 2008):

The two best relationships of my life were with much younger women and I am actively looking for someone much younger woman now. We were both good for each other, we learned from each other and we had fantastic sex together.

Most if not all women my age can't keep up, and want to do things that I can't even imagine doing 20 years from now. Perhaps I just age slowly. I know of a man of 61 who married a 21 year old and now they have a young daughter. They are very happy.

There were certainly bumps in the road, and I needed to be very understanding, but that was very minor compared to the joy we shared. It's not about age as much as being on the same wavelength and sharing the same values.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2008):

There is a 28 year gap between my husband and I and it is horrible. He is controlling and constantly fearful that I will be unfaithful. Our priorities are completely different and we have nothing in common anymore. Now 55, he is really starting to act his age and I am feeling very trapped. If I could do it over again, I would never marry someone so much older than me, and to think it is only going to get worse. He is so set in his ways and unwilling to compromise. I know this must sound shallow, but I truly do feel like a prisoner.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2008):

Hi,

Me and my fiancee have a 21 year age gap, he is 42 and myself 21. We met nearly a year ago and almost instantaneously moved in together.

We recently got engaged and are very happy together, i have never been so compatible with anyone like this before. We dont let our age get in the way, if anything we use it as an advantage, as we can teach each other new things. Although my family and friends seemed a little uncomfortable with the situation at first they're coming round to the idea now, as they can see how in love we are.

I believe that love has no boundaries or age limits, we are only on this earth for a small period of time and should thus follow ones heart and be with the person one feels happiest with, regardless of wether the relationship fits in with the societal norm.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008):

Hello everyone, Im 26 and my b/f is 47 and we've very much in love. We've been seeing each other since I was 18, so almost 8 years now. We have a complicated relationship, he was with someone else until about a year and a half ago, which I knew about but she still does not. I was with my ex g/f when we met and saw him as just a bit of fun, we met on the internet.

I moved down south to move in with him about a year ago and although we're happy most of the time there are still some problems. He priortises his ex's feeling, we live in a small community and he doesn't want me to get a job etc because he doesn't want his ex to know I've moved in so soon. He told her we met a year ago. At first I was understanding of this but now I'm fed up, I feel like he's asking me to put my life on hold to save someone elses feelings. Before I moved in I told him I want kids, now he says he doesn't want them because it'll upset his ex, she's in her late thirties, single and childless. I can't imagine not being with him, I've had these expectations and hopes for so long and now it's nothing like I thought it would be. I want a future with him, I hope we can work through our problems but he's very stressed with work and doesn't want to talk about anything, just says everyone is putting pressure on him. I want to save our relationship but it's all moving too slow, I need more. My family all like him, his parents made no comment but treated me like a child (I look 10 years younger than I am, although I imagine that'll work out with time. Anyone else in this prediciment or had any similar experience? Should I stick it out and let things just happen in their own time? Am I asking too much?

[moderator note: To the answerer, why not post this as a question in the main page?]

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008):

i get really annoyed with some peoples comments like urg hes 50 and they look in disbelief that it could be possible that i bieng 27 could possibly be in love with someone the same age as my father.love doesnt know age limits ,and also when people assume that it must be for his money!i have a laugh in the shops when theyre tring to figure out if we are father and daughter or a couple i lovingly put my hand on his bum and watch their faces priceless hayley x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008):

My boyfriend and I are 16 years apart, I just turned 20 and he is 36. My friends find it quite strange and somewhat intimidating (when speaking to him etc.) but he doesn't have some kind of grip on me and never uses his age as a way of being superior to me. We are on the same level and give each other the freedom and space to do what we want, and it works great to just face everyone and not try to hide our relationship. We love each other endlessly, so our relationship is definitely successful.

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (3 May 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntIt seem's that people take a different view of an age gap relationship where the woman is the older partner.As we have mentioned before our best friend's Val and Dave have a 20 year age gap with Val being the older partner.They have been together for over 21 year's now and do not remember ever having people comment or object to their relationship. We also think that once the youngest parner reaches the age of 21 people seem to care less about the age gap anyway. The fact that the actual gap is still the same as before does not seem to be important but that the youngest partner has reached an age where they are old enough to be able to make their own mind up (perhaps they were not before???)

Maybe some people should take a deep long look at their own relationship before passing judgement on other's

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2008):

I have been in a agegap relationship, my last partner was 8yrs my junior. He was 18 and i was 26 when we meet. It lasted for 10 years, I have no regrets and nor does he, it was my decision to have split but we had great times. I have always been attracted to the younger man, no matter what. it seems my perception of who i am and what i want has not changed in 18yrs lol. But I am currently sort of seeing a 18yr old guy, you hear so much about girls with much older males, but seems very little in the reversal. I worry so much about the age difference, and it is me that has the issues over age, not him. I dont want him to miss out on anything. But i know i love him and he loves me. his mother has a hard time dealing with it, especially since she is same age as me. Its others knowing looks that darken my days, when I should just be happy with the kind caring man holding my hand.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008):

Hi,

my partner and I have an age gap of 30 years, we dont find this a problem at all, ok, we do get a few funny looks now and again, and I often get asked if he is my father or if his kids are my brother and sister, but we expected this from the begining of our relationship. As we live in Spain the attitude towards our relationship is different than in England, the blokes dont really mind at all (especialy the ones over 25), but the women find it very strange and most will critise me when ever possible, and they usally blank me and my partner, but thankfully not the kids. I think that I am very lucky because I have a great relationship with my partner even though he is older than my mum he acts so so much younger and I cant imagine being with anyone else,and i have always been more comfortble with people that are older than me. His kids are wonderful and I even get on alright with his ex-wife! (how strange is that!) Even though my friends find it a little creepy, they are getting used to it as the days go on and they have even stop trying to talk me out of seeing him! My family however I have not had the guts to tell yet! (after two years!!!)(Mainly because my Dad kicked my sister out for dating a guy 5 years older than her and 7 years later she has married him and expecting her first child, but,my parents still dont talk to her!) Im not quite sure what to do about this because i want to keep up a good relationship with my family. His family have met me and they excepted me right away! Which shocked me because of the age gap and the fact I'm forgien like his Ex. I feel that if you're in love no matter what the country, ages (if legal of course), religion, etc. . . you should be allowed to see the person you love with out any predujice at all! If you really care for the person your with go for it. Together you can get through anything!

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (29 April 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntWe dont really think that the advert for Sugardaddie.com or any similar type of advert belongs or has any place in this website.To be honest we as a couple find it insulting. Our relationship is from the heart and not the pocket. It's not based on material thing's but on mutual love and understanding.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008):

My man is 20 years older than me.I have never been so loved and never loved anyone like I do him.

If I listened to ther peoples prejudice then I would be missing out on the best relationship I ever had.

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (15 April 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntWe enjoyed reading Lenni's comment's and as alway's would love to hear from other people in Age Gap relationship's. After all that's the whole point of this site. Kayley and i blog most day's on our MSN site http://grasshopper17.spaces.live.com/default.aspx

and have been doing so for over 12 month's now.

We are just a normal couple to us but as i guess most of you know other people often see us as being strange.

But we are in love and very happy. We have been married now for comming up to 19 month's and have no regret's at all

Age gap? what age gap.....lol

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A female reader, Lenni United Kingdom +, writes (9 April 2008):

ello there

i want to respond partly to Phil and Kayley and tell a bit about my story. to Phil &amp; Kayley, i am so exited to meet (even if its just on the internet) people of a very similar age gap relationship.it makes me feel that i am not alone, that WE are not alone!

i will try not to cary on with all my story, it will be too long but i will tell that i have 35 years gap between me and John. but most of the time we dont feel it as i would say i am a mature 20 and he is so so young at heart and body - he is a runner so he looks stunningly fit and younger for his age - we are now engaged (in the eyes of god) and we are getting to the point of taking the serious decision of marriage

i really dont like when people are judgmental about our relationship, thinking that it is for money or sex as i did not PLAN to fall in love with my darling. actually we feel a lot that there was something that told us that its meant to be as we met on coincidence that was very beautiful (people are welcome to write to me to ask more) and that was it for us. so back to peoples opinion again, sometimes it does bother me. it is one of our biggest obstacle at times, but children is another. he has already 5 children and is divorced from that woman, but it is getting a bit difficult for me knowing what to do when some of he's children are older than me (which is a bit embarrassing and difficult to swallow for both sides) and harmony and acceptance is so desired.

i wish for everybody in an AGR to be strong and faith as there is a reason for everything, so the relationship not just a mistake

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2008):

I have an age gap of 15years. It was never a problem. we started dating when I was 16 But he is in my family so we already knew him. he is my half 2nd cousin. and we never noticed the age when we got together. it took his part of the family a while to come round but now they are very happy. To make it work we just ignored every bad comment someone said and we compramised. Just take your time and if anyone says its wrong dont listen! I am now 23years old and we have been married for 2yrs and have our first child on the way. It does work. you just have to be sensible, talk to each other and trust each other. Hope everything works out! xxxx

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008):

I have been in an age gap relationship for nearly 4 years now. I wouldnt say there is any difference to this being a relationship with someone the same age. The main focus is the people, their likes, dislikes, what they have in common and how compatible they are.

There is 11 years difference between my partner and I and we have never even noticed the age. It has it's benefits as the older partner can pass on knowledge, wisdom and understanding and the younger partner keeps them in touch with everything else going on and adds that fun aspect. I am quite a mature 23 year old and my partner is a very young 34 year old... it's only other people that may have the issue. I explain my situation to people and they say oh, ok..then they see us together, how we are and always say we are a fantastic couple, so well suited and very much in love!

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (2 April 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntIf you are in an "age gap" relationship one of the best attributes to have besides being in love is a sence of humour. The reaction of other people toward's your relationship will amaze you at times.Once again yesterday it was presumed that i was Phil's daughter because of our 32 year age gap and when we explained the situation the embarassment was such you could cut a knife through the atmosphere. We as always laughed it off. The look on the person's face helped us to do so.

But hey you get use to it.....lol

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2008):

my partner and i have an age gap of 14 years we have a very good relationship in alot of ways but i struggle to trust him sometimes. he makes so happy and i love him so much he has children and i have one so i will not be expecting any more and we are clear on that, he is 38 and me 24 many people would not see that as a problem but people do and as long as we love eachother and trust eachother we will over come that. he is also the only man ive been with i see myself spending my life with. we understand eachothers needs in every way and understand we both need space from time to time but to answer your question if you love someone it does not matter how old you or they are he means so mugh to me and i adore him he makes me laugh and sometimes i think i act older than him so i do believe they can work. thanks jane.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2008):

my partner and i have an age gap of 14 years he is 38 and iam 24 he makes me so happy and i love him very much. we get on very well despite our difference in age and we understand eachothers needs in every way so i do believe age gap relationships do work with strengh trust and love.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2008):

hi,

i have been in a age gap relationship for nearly three years now and there is a huge gap. I am 21 and my partner is 42...double my age!!

There are loads of problems this has caused for us , however there are more good things to say about my relationship than there are bad. One of the biggest p[roblems is that of other people...although i dont see what business it is of theirs.

of course there are prolems attached to these types of relationships but there is also compromise and sacrifice involved in maintaining any relationship...there is just often more needed here.

I think the fact that I do not want children for at least two years is a issue that rears its head every so often...but then he also understands that I have a life to lead and he has already lived through his twenties. I know he would not want to make me unhappy and so he doesnt force this issue but i also see his [perspective and realise that if we are to stay together then children would be an option sooner i.e. 2-3 years rather than later i.e. 5-6 years.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008):

hiya thanx for all of youre answers 2 my question bout wether or not the older partner finds it more difficult there are more people than i thought with a big age gap in there relationship its nice to know that im not alone in my problems we will keep loving eachther regardless of the large age gaps hayley x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2008):

hi my name is louise and my boyfriend is 29 years my senior and im 18 a 15 year gap is nothing being in a age gap relationship is just like anyother all that matters is that you love one and other and your happy people dont exspect where together most of the time but i just blurt it out because to be honist whats it got to do with them and also happyness in life is the one thing anybody can have if they want itx dont worry what anyone says because why make their problem yours?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2008):

I think its a very good idea. We are in a largish age gap and have found locally things are harder but that further afield people dont really care.

We could have done with feeling less isolated when it all started because actions of others in a way forced everything to happen quicker than we expected. There were also added difficulties cos I was still at school and we did not know what are rights were. We also had a huge battle with Benefits because of how I was classed by some as a partner and others as a child. There was no logic to this and it was only with the help of a solicitor that I found out what I was entitled to.

What would this site be? Most of the sites that deal with this seem to be an exchange of opinions and some of them can be nasty and that might put people off. If you are going to do an AGR site perhaps it could offer advice and help in certain areas like legal advice, benefits etc.

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (11 March 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntWe have been Agony Aunt's for almost 12 month's now and enjoy reading all the problems and comment's posted. We have infact made friend's with people involved in Age Gap relationship's and feel that a site that deal's on a more personal level and in more depth is needed. There are many of us out there people. We are not alien's but normal human being's.We just happen to fall for a partner who is perhaps in a differnt age group.

Do you think it's a good idea and would you be prepared to contribute with a perhaps a few words about your relationship......we would love to know

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2008):

I am 27 and my boyfriend is 48. We have been together for just over a year and find the biggest obstacles for us are other people's prejudices. He has two teenage daughters who are still rather upset about their parents' breakup and respective new partners. I too look young for my age and I think its all a bit embarrassing for the girls. Still, I am resolved to stay quietly in the background so as not to unsettle them too much. I want them to come through adolescence without resenting me when they're adults. Perhaps this is wishful thinking.

I spent months worrying about telling my parents, convinced they would disown me. It began to make me irritable with them and distant. However, one day plucked up the courage to tell my mum, she dealt with dad and they have been more accepting of us than i ever imagined. In the end, i have realised my family and friends only want my happiness and if it lies with an older man then so be it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008):

Hi. I'm a 29 year old woman and my boyfriend is 49. We've been together for just over a year having met at work 2 years ago. We have the best time together, we talk about everything, we have loads in common and fancy each other like mad (the sex is sensational). We do get some disapproving looks when we're out (I look a bit younger than I am), but our friends and his family (including teenage kids) are all really happy for us. I say his family, because I haven't had the courage to tell my parents, who are only a few years older than my partner. This is largely because he was a mentor to me at work, and my mother has very fixed ideas about things (I was 26 and a practising lawyer when we first met, and almost 28 when we got together, so I was hardly a virginal ingenue!) and believes that men like that are predators (nothing could be less like my gentle, wonderful, kind man). She's also a bit of a body facist, and won't be able to see past his beer belly and bald patch - she thinks that because I'm a tall, attractive blonde I should have a gorgeous young man (even though my boyfriend is actually very good looking).

I have never been happier, and would love to have the courage to tell my parents about my relationship, as concealing it is causing me ever increasing anxiety. I firmly believe that age doesn't matter, as long as you are well matched emotionally and mentally - who cares about numbers? Of course I worry about him getting old before me - but i might get run over by a bus next week, and so might any man my own age. Life should be lived in the moment :)

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (10 February 2008):

Phil and Kayley agony auntIn answer to Hayley's question.......

From my point of view and as the "older partner"...lol i dont think our relationship is any more difficult for myself than it is for Kayley my wife.Infact it's no more difficult than what people see as a "normal" relationship. Other people have more problem's with us than we do with ourself's. When we do come across an "age gap issue" ie something one of us is a little unsure or lack's the knowledge about we normaly laugh about it. I for example sometimes struggle with the pace of technology (mp3 player's ect )which my wife has vast knowledge about..lol

It's all about finding the ballance in your relationship and if you love each other it's fun finding it!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2008):

hi im hayley and im 26 and my partner is 50 ,we are very much in love still we met when i was 21 and are still going strong i dont think an age gap is a big problem at all how will i feel when he is 70 and im still quite young i dont know all i know is that i love him and still fancy him and i think for the older partner age is all in the mind and you are as young as the woman you feel isnt that the comment ha ha and stuff the comments from other people if you truly love eachother small minded people wont bother you sometimes i think that the age gap concerns my partner more than me because he is the older one ?can anyone help me out with that question do you think its harder 4 the older partner ?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008):

Thanks to Kev and others who actually cut to the root of the problem which is perception and judgement combined with preconceived notions of what is right and wrong. It is lovely to read about people with similar experiences and happiness, but the sad thing is also the commonality in the rhetoric of peoples judgement that we also have to suffer, such as the appalling ignorance concerning peoples wrinkles or whatever. Can these people really really exist asnd are they really so shallow?

I am a philosopher by training and have accepted that morality is often subjective in most peoples cases. You just have to look at the plethora of different moral systems to realise that. However what is even more alarming is the preponderance of those systems that claim to be universally applicable and so absolutely right. This creates a conflicting claims approach and ultimately it does not take much to see that morality is relative.

My point is that people judge too quickly in most moral isses, but exceptionally quickly in age gap relationships. Moreover the younger one of the partners the quicker the judgement.

I would be the first to agree all of us need constraints and sensibility in our relationships but maybe if we stopped applying a blanket approach and were more inclined to listen rather than judge each case on merit our eyes may be opened to the realities of love. In loves case, age is a number.

Be careful it may happen to you!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2008):

I am pleased to see so many different couples living in fully functional relationships where a huge age difference exist. My husband and I are 20 years apart in age and have been in a committed relationship (now marriage) for close to five years.

We both engulf the same goals, morales and values. Therefore, my greatest fear hinged on how my parents especially my father would accept him. How would he feel about my being in love with someone so much older than me? My father and I sat down and had a true heart-to-heart talk. He asked me, "Do you truly love this man?" I answered, "Yes." My father gave me a comforting smile and said, "Then, if you love him I know you are happy. It does not matter what I think. I will like him no matter what."

In 2004, life became much more clear to me. I was in love with a man: not an older man, but a man. A man worth waking up to in the moring. A man who understood me and accepted me for me. A man who when apart from him we both felt like we lost our best friends. I am so glad that I married this wonderful, oustanding man who is worth everything we go thorugh in life to be happy.

It is true relationships are hard work. However it is much more fun working at a relationship with someone you enjoy being around. We have our normal differences of opinion, but what relationship does not. It is life and how we develop as human beings. Age is just a number, but experience life first to understand it.

congratulations and many more years of success and happiness.

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A male reader, Kev-Irish Ireland +, writes (4 January 2008):

I can't believe the insensitive comments made re Wrinkly Bottom. How dare anyone rate a person's worth on the appearence of a body part! I take it that if the person who made the comment were to be in an accident like a serious Car crash or were burned in a fire etc that they would retire into a dark hole and give up on life because like minded people shared her opinions. How superficial. Are there no mirrors in her house, Is she a 10 has she perfect lips, boobs , ass, eyes, hair, teeth, jeez give me a break. We live 4 today, we can only experience what's happening now. You could marry someone with 5 years in the difference and have a heart attack and die. I'm livid. Ok underage, totally unacceptable but everything else goes, you end up facing the same direction for a long time in a wooden box, for christs sake live life, respect each other, be honest, faithful and loving, the rest shud follow

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007):

I am in an age gap relationship. I am 31, my husband is 50! We have been together 7 years and have two children together.

The age gap seems to cause more problems now than it did back then. I don't want to be 50 and he doesn't want to be 30. I want a bigger family, he doesn't because of his age. I had a realisation that by the time my children are grown up and independant, he will be in his 70's and it is quite possible I will be looking after him or a widow!

Love is a funny thing, but it doesn't conquer all! I wouldn't be without him, but I really wish he was a bit younger!

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A male reader, Phil and Kayley +, writes (26 December 2007):

Phil and Kayley agony aunt My Mrs is much younger than me,

It's caused some family fear's,

They do not like the age difference,

Of 32 plus year's,

But we are married and much in love,

My life is so complete,

Ok so we upset a few,

And more we're yet to meet,

She's not missed out on teenage thing's,

As people said she would,

She's wiser, smarter than her age,

And also does me good,

We are as one, with the same goal,

Together we are strong,

Now married for far past a year,

Already proved them wrong.

Like any other relationship,

The rules to survive are the same,

To respect,tell the truth and be faithfull,

Not to treat your partner like a game,

True love does conker all, in the end you will win,

If your heart it is in the right place,

After all you are part of a very large club,

Welcome all to the real human race.......................

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2007):

I never minded a relations ship that had an age gap of ten years nor 20...the thing is though that I have fallen in love with someone that is 40. I am 17.

It started with us just getting to know each other. Um, we hardly ever have anything like music, food or whatever in common but our values and beliefs are the same.

And we get a long great!!!

We hardly ever argue and he respects me and treats me like a queen.

I know some people talk about how it is hard because I would have to "give" up personal experiences to be with an older guy. I have thought about it...but if I love him I don't mind growing with him.

I want to be with him because he loves me and respects me. Because he is independent, but still a family man. I would love to one day have children with him.

I don't mind giving up my life experiences because I love him, and I'm not those kind of party girls that get drunk and have sex.

I am calm, and he is calm and I really want to be with him. I don't think an age should matter in a relationshop.

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A female reader, Pixie_Elena United Kingdom +, writes (24 December 2007):

I have been in a relationship with a man 29 years older than myself for a few months now.

We have alot in common and we get on as best friends as well as lovers.

Before we met i had been married to a man seven years older than me which did not work out.

I think it depends on the people involved, not the age difference. If two people enjoy each others company and find each other attractive and fall in love then who is anyone to say anything against that.

I have found that for the first time in my life that i am being treated with respect and have really found true love.My friends and family have supported me all the way and are glad to see me happy for once in my life.

I think this would be different maybe if i were a teenager but I am in my 20's, i dont see his age when i look at him, i see the man i have fallen in love with.