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I want to go to this dance, but my mum won't let me. Should I lie about it?

Tagged as: Family, Teenage, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 May 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 May 2011)
A female Ireland age 26-29, *innieThePoohRocks! writes:

I want to go to a teenage disco which my other two best friends have gone to, they said it was class. Its June now and the one for school finishing is on this Friday the 3rd, though my parents wont allow me till the one on halloween and I'm not waiting that long, no way.. so I'm gonna say I'm going to one of their houses for a sleepover and I'm gonna go to the disco that night from nine till 12.. my mum will more than likely text me or ring me to see if I am ok and to say goodnight. should I text before her and say I'm going watchin a dvd, or what should I do to prevent her ringing me and suspecting something? :/ help please.. urgent.. btw im 14 and a half

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A female reader, lacrymosa_652 United Kingdom +, writes (30 May 2011):

lacrymosa_652 agony auntI think you should ask your parents what their reasons are for not letting you go, and see if you can compromise - e.g. if they say they don't want you going off with boys or something, say you'll just stick with your friends and you just want to have fun with the girls.

If they still say no, I don't think you should lie to them and go to the disco anyway. If you get caught out, they won't see you as mature and will probably ground you and you may not even be allowed to the halloween party, or even for any more sleepovers. You don't want to lose your parents trust, you want to show them you can be respectful and mature.

I don't mean to sound patronising, but you're young and this seems like a huge deal to you right now, but one day, it really won't be. October isn't forever away, you may as well just wait until they'll let you go to that one. Maybe they want you to wait till you're a bit older [15] to attend these kinds of functions. But anyway... don't lie to your parents. You'll regret it. Even if they don't catch you out [though they probably will] you'll feel tense and guilty all evening from the lie.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (30 May 2011):

Why won't they let you go? Because it's not sensible to lie to them. You'll get found out or something, and then wonder why the grounded you and are disappointed. Or, in an extreme, you could like, an emergency could arise and you'll be screwed.

So we need to know why you aren't allowed to go before we give you advice.

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