| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: A part of me is not developed or underdeveloped. It is that of social skills and that of having a conversation with people in general. I always tend to rather argue or analyse or act as judgemental and it pisses off some people especially women. I can only have a conversation with female where I am listening and they do all the talking. I have nothing meaningful to talk with women. Moreover, I always feel that I have some defects in me. This is because of my upbringing where people acted in a judgemental way and magnified smallest of my flaws to make me believe as I was abnormal and ill-suited. How do I hone my social skills to improve quality of my life? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Ellis Mac +, writes (13 October 2005):
It's simple. All you do is acknowledge that deep down we are all the same. Everyone has 'something' that they are carrying around with them. Some are really good at covering over it in social situations, but that doesn't mean that if they met someone at a party, that they felt they could lower their cover to, they wouldn't. Have faith in mankind. There are lots of people at lots of parties that would much rather be real with someone, and have a chance to discuss something that holds deep for them.
True, there are many that are not ready to deal with anything more meaningful, but know that their turn will come. Just asking someone what they did today, can start off a conversation , and who knows where it might lead.
So I guess my advice is to be relaxed, and have faith in others. I'm a great believe that you get out what you put in.
You have been judged, so you are now judging that others will be judging you. Just drop it.
Don't concern yourself with what conclusion others may or may not arrive at for you. That's their deal. In the meantime, you are the one not having a good time at parties.
Don't close yourself down through fear of being judged, that's what making you feel that you have no social skills. You do. We all do, and we all have so much in commom. Open up and let the real you shine out!
|
