A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Alright so heres my story. Im 17 and Basically me and my girlfriend have been together for 6 months on and off. Weve stopped talking twice before this relationship. The first time was for a week and the second time was for a month. But both for the same reasons. she said that she was loosing feelings for me. The first time we stopped. We would talk she would say she knows she loves me its somewere in ther and shes gonna try to get her feelings back cus she wants to be with me and she did. She missed me after a week and got her feelings back and told me she loved me and we got back. Then once again we broke up and didnt get back for almost 5-6 weeks. The second time she lost feelings and we stopped talking. She would tell me she looses feelings cus she feels no mans right for her. she doesent want relationships no guys right for her theres nobody out ther for her and all this stuff. And i just kept telling her how much i love her and that she is the one for me and i know it. Cus i sereously do think she is the one for me and i wouldent want any other women.Througout our whole relationship i would keep telling her how much i love her and how much i wanna marry her we would text everydayy all day long till we slept.Although we never got a chance to go out much because her parents were strict. But we always texted kissed alot hung out at school and i always like to hold her alot and stuff. We would constantly tell eachothewr i love you this that. I was always told i was way too nice at her. I would usually get jealous and pisst when guys would message her and stuff. I would tell her she couldent wear these kinda clothes at school cus it exposed her and what pictures not to put up on myspace. and all that basically i was honestly a little too overprotective. but besides that i always texted her let her know i love her and everything. but neway that was a brief explanation of our relationship altho theres way more. back to the loosing feeling breakup situation. About the 3rd week we just chatted and stuff as friends till the fifth week we went out with a group of friends. I went sat next to her we hugged and stuff and she turned around crying confessed that she had kissed another guy. I got raged and pisst and walked outside to have a ciggarete. She came chasing me crying telling me that shes so sorry and that in the process of that kiss she didnt feel anything and realized that i was the only guy for her. that she only loved me and she told me she loves me. even tho 5 weeks before that she said no guys right for her she looses feelings for me cus im not the one this that. Ya she cryed and stuff in my arms told me sorry she kissed him he did he she didnt mean too and all this. and that everything happens for a reason and that it happened for her to get her feelings back for me. So the next day she told me she loves me this time she feels it shes not letting go she loves me and stuff. So again we went on with our relationship. With the everyday texts and stuff altho this time she didnt really show any signs of loosing feelings much. still we went on at times for 4 days she would act very weird not saying i love you after a goodnight and stuff. but i was use to all that because shes a virgo and she was just like that. cus after those 4 days wed go back to our normal i love yous and stuff. but ya about the 5th week after being together one weekend we barely texted eachother. we did but not as much as usual and she wouldent say i love you after good nights and stuff so i knew she was loosing feelings i asked her she said no. the day after the weekend i told her about her friend that i didnt really want her hanging out with cus i didnt have a good feeling about her friend and siad i dont really want you hanging out with her your name goes down such and such. and she had just found this friend about 1 week ago before she hated this girl. now anyway ya i told her about her friend and i dont want her really hanging out with her and she just went crazy angry. didnt talk to me till afterschool i tryed apologizing she said go away and stuff. i went home got a text saying she wants to break up and all this stuff. and i said wtf your gonna put this friend infront of me she said ya bye. later at night she told me the friend situation wasnt the real reason. she just took time over the weekend and realized shes too young for a relationship she doesent want one right now. shes not fit she doesent know how to be a gf she doesent know if any guys are right for her and so on. she said she hadent lost feelings but thinking like this shes loosing feelings and saying were prolly not gonna get back. ever and all this. basically almost the same thing as the second time we broke up. Now i really love this girl and i sereously want her back. i dont want her kissing another guy to come back to me altho if thats what it takes ok but if theres another way to get her back. PLEASEEEE TELL ME I NEEED HELP TO KNOW HOW. I WANT THIS GIRL BACK AND I WANT TO MARRY HER. people tell me my mistake was being to nice to her and nto really acting like the man in the relationship cus i was too good hearted and nice with her. now im thinking she just kept getting bored with me but i dno LADIES PLEASE READ THIS AND LEMME KNOW YOUR OPINIONNN PLEASEE HELPP
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broke up, I love you, jealous, kissing, my ex, myspace, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2009): hello
ive read your letter i can honestly say you love this girl and you dont wanna loose her but you have to think of how shes feeling inside she wouldnt want to hurt you but things happen and relationships are tough i think maybe she need space and bit of time i've been in similar situations i loved my boyfriend then my feelings for him changed i didnt know why they changed but he didnt understand how i felt he just made me feel bad all the time when all i wanted to do was put things right then where as your girlfriend kissed another boy she realised that she does feel something for you because she wouldn't have told you she loves you and your the only one she wants to be with to be honest i think you just have to leave it a while because if she keeps breaking up with you and leaving you confused she must be going through a hard time and your friens could be right maybe you was too nice to her i bet there telling you to forget about her trust me i know it hurts ive bere too i tried to forget but i couldn't so i dont expect you to but you have to think positive make her realise your coping fine without her because deep down shes hurting you and she'll be hurting hersleft because you do deserve to be treated better see how it goes but im not taking sides i think none of you ar wrong here its just ive been in her situation and yours so i understand how your both feeling
best of luck xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2009): GO NC its the only way, (no contact). basically you Dont answer her calls, ignore her, dont reply to her txt's, dont show her any form of attention. then watch what happens ;) (she will come running back, if your lucky) theres your secret recipe sport. It works wonders, however if this doesnt work, then she obviously does not want to be with you. move ongoodluck
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A
female
reader, bellaaddison +, writes (8 May 2009):
I think you have recieved good information here. I know that you were hoping for some secret reciepe to win back the girl of your dreams, but that just doesn't exsist. You need to just listen to what she has told you and if that means leaving her alone and letting her go, than that's what needs to be done. I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but you will love again, and again, and again.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOkkk everyoneee pleaseee stopp worrying about the marriage part we just barely talked about the marriage part it was just to be cute and because we both didnt beleive in a relationship that doesent leave to marriage. So pleaseee just forget i wrote the marriage part and answer the rest i need help on the rest. Just please stop telling me i need to figure myself out i never said i want to marry her now i ment later in the future. Pleaseeee answerr my questionnn and about the essay and count out the marriagee partt thankk youu guysss love everyoneee whos answeringg and helpinggg =]
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A
female
reader, bellaaddison +, writes (7 May 2009):
Honestly honey, you're too young to be considering marriage. You've barely begun to experience life. I'm not trying to take anything away from your feelings but you need to slow down alittle. You kinda scared me and I'm not even your girlfriend! If you want my honest opinion, it wasn't the kindness that pushed her away, it was your demanding and controlling disposition. There is a healthy and genuine way to love someone and telling them what they can and cannot do, wear, who they can associate with is NOT a healthy love. It's an obsession! You need to really take a break, for her sake and your own. Get your feelings in check and give her some space. Maybe in time the two of you can start to talk again and see where the feelings are then, but for now, you both need a cooling off period. Too serious, too much, too fast!!
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