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I told my boyfriend I'm a virgin but I'm not

Tagged as: Sex, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2017) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 September 2017)
A female India age 22-25, *usmita gurung writes:

I had sex with my partner in April 2016 ...I had sex one time with him and till now I haven't had sex with anyone ..

I have a boyfriend to whom I had said that I'm virgin and he is asking for sex so what should I do so to look like that I'm virgin???

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (13 September 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntSweetie you cannot make yourself look like a virgin. Why did you feel you needed to lie to him about it? You are not married to this guy and he is wanting sex from you, do you love him? If so then be honest with him. I understand that your culture is different to mine but I think you need to be honest in a relationship for it to work. If you are not meant to have sex before marriage in your culture then maybe you should wait until someone is willing to marry you? Someone you love and want to spend your life with.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2017):

Why does he want to know if you are virgin or not? Would he stop asking you for sex if you told him you are still virgin? Tell him yes you are virgin and presist on that and tell him if he wants to have sex with you he has to marry you. I am not quite sure what the indian culture say about sex before marriage but if it is one of those cultures which insist on the bride to be virgin on her wedding day then I advice you not to have sex anymore and pretend and insist that you have never been touched before even to your future husband. Silly questions need silly answers.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2017):

A guy would have to be an idiot not to know you aren't a virgin. With most women there are definitely signs.

There is sometimes bleeding and tightness and the first time it should be hard to get in.

If you are loose or your hymen is already broken and you are well lubed then you are no virgin.

My bf was not getting it inside me the first time without a ton of effort. He had to break my hymen with his fingers first. It hurt like hell too. Then he inserted his penis inside me. It was still very tight according to him.

I think most guys should know or at least know enough to question you if you are lying about it.

Is your bf a virgin? No? Well then you are equal. And that is just fine.

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A female reader, YouWish United States + , writes (10 September 2017):

YouWish agony auntUhh, try telling him the truth??

Don't lie in your relationships. This boyfriend is asking for sex, so obviously your state of virginity isn't something he's wanting to preserve. And if he's only with you because he thinks you're a virgin, then he's not worth being with in the first place. This is the 21st century, and by the light-speed manner in which he wants to jump into bed with you, he's not a virgin either!

Come clean, tell him the truth, and then see how it goes. You do not want to build a relationship on a lie. Ever. Own your past choices, or you will never truly be happy in life.

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