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I think her BF is cheating on her, and I like her. What should I do, forget her?

Tagged as: Friends, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 May 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 7 May 2008)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hi all

Got myself a bit of a pickle. Last weekend i was out with my mates and we ended up in a nightclub. I met this really really nice girl there, we ended up dancin and talkin for ages. tho she was very shy and kept smiling whenever i looked at her. basically really enjoyin ourselves plus we were slightly physical, but neither of us were pissed. unfortunately i had to go but before i left i gave her my number, and just hoped for the best. Truth is i had seen this girl around before because the place where she works is where i go for my shoppin (thought she was really pretty).

Didnt get a text off her sadly. but i discovered a family member has known her dad for years and i was told that about a month ago she had moved in with her BOYFRIEND! i'd been into the place where she works recently and saw me and stared for a while then looked away. i was far too nervous to say anythin.

bottom line, for some reason i really like her, always thought she was sweet. Any advice from anyone????? obviously best to forget her but i know recently that on her birthday her boyfriend went out with HIS mates and she stayed in on her own, and ive seen him with other women on his lap too.

View related questions: moved in, shy, text

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A male reader, WastedLife United States +, writes (7 May 2008):

Don't forget her, but don't lose more sleep than necessary over her either. Mistake #1 was not getting HER number and email. It comes off as weak. Girls rarely if ever call first. You come across as a supplicant rather than an easygoing master, and it doesn't work, except for friendship. Then she'll never sleep with you.

Best move is to get busy being with other girls, and get a reputation with them as cool. She'll see or hear. Then you can indicate mild interest as you go about your business with the other girls. She wants the guy she has because he seems hot to the other girls, and because he creates drama and huge emotional swings. That is addictive to many girls. And that is why friends don't qualify to be lovers.

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A male reader, WastedLife United States +, writes (6 May 2008):

Don't forget her, but don't lose more sleep than necessary over her either. Mistake #1 was not getting HER number and email. It comes off as weak. Girls rarely if ever call first. You come across as a supplicant rather than an easygoing master, and it doesn't work, except for friendship. Then she'll never sleep with you.

Best move is to get busy being with other girls, and get a reputation with them as cool. She'll see or hear. Then you can indicate mild interest as you go about your business with the other girls. She wants the guy she has because he seems hot to the other girls, and because he creates drama and huge emotional swings. That is addictive to many girls. And that is why friends don't qualify to be lovers.

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (6 May 2008):

TELLULAH agony auntAdvice is:: Dont get involved. If you tell her she will not thank you for it believe me!

I know its hard when you like someone, but the fact is she is taken and didnt use your number, so that is a clear indication that she wants her boyfriend. If he is mucking her around let her find out for herself (which she will eventually). "What will be will be" is a very true saying. You might end up together, one day.

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