A
male
age
26-29,
*ukey
writes:So, a few weeks ago I was meeting up with this guy a few times a week. We met at a Bridal Fair so you can imagine my excitement at finally meeting a nice guy. Anyway, we met up to see movies at the cinema, grab food, etc. Then on one occasion we went to the local fairground, and he invited me back to his house after. This was the first time I'd ever been to his house. One thing led to another and we ended up making out a little. Then things got a little more heated, but we didn't go all the way. The next morning we kissed goodbye and i went home. This is the part that confuses me. From that night, which was about 30th of September, he has made no contact with me. None. Ive messaged him, text him. Nothing. Everything was fine. We seemed like we we're working out pretty well i mean we had a good laugh with each other and he told me he really liked me, and then the next thing he ignores me. So was he just using me? Was i just a one night stand? Because i don't want to be that to him. I don't get what i did wrong. Maybe he's just confused i don't know but its really hurt me to be treated like this.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 November 2013):
 perhaps he realized after your night at his place that there was no real chemistry and instead of being an adult and saying "hey it's not going to work out" he just fell off the face of the earth because HE WAS DONE and it was easier FOR HIM.
sadly there is no real reason for anyone to behave this way
but if you have had no contact initiated by him for over a month, he's history.
sadly you can't see that this is NOT about you and NOT a reflection on you.. it's all about him and it reflects poorly on his adult management skills.
Chalk it up to nothing at all an move on....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2013): I'm sorry! If you were the one who stopped him from going all the way, maybe he dropped you because he realized it wouldn't be so easy to get sex from you and he didn't want to make the effort. In other words, he was sexually frustrated and acting like a child about the whole thing. thankfully, you didn't sleep with this "child". I could only imagine how much more hurt and attached you'd feel. He definitely doesn't seem worth the effort to me either.~Maureen~
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (3 November 2013):
 If he has ignored you all this time he isn't worth a second thought! If he was a decent guy he would have contacted you somehow, text, Facebook, email, phone, Skype, in person... There is no excuse! The issue is with him not you so move on...
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (3 November 2013):
Since you didn't have sex it doesn't really qualify as a one night stand. If all he wanted was sex he probably would have asked you out again to try and sleep with you.
If you can't figure out what you did wrong then you probably didn't do anything wrong. It's easy to feel like you did,but its most likely just a quirk with him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2013): Perhaps you were the first person he met in a long time that he could be open and out to.
He wasn't looking for a relationship, maybe just a kiss or sex. You don't give his age; but if he feels you are too young, he doesn't want to encourage you. He knows it's easy to spark a crush in someone your age.
You will learn there will be times you will be a one night stand. That doesn't mark you as some sort of tart or social pariah. You can't instantly fall for everyone who fancy's you. They may just find you attractive and want to kiss or touch you. Let them go only so far, if you want them to get to know you better. Even then, you may only get to see them that one time only.
He may already have a girlfriend or a boyfriend. You got along famously for a day. That was something special and you can just hold on to it as a great memory. Maybe you'll meet again, maybe not. Don't attach your feelings to every guy who kisses or has sex with you! You'll always end up with a broken heart. People don't always return the same feelings. Let this be a lesson to remember.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2013): What a tosser! Unfortunately, I think you found yourself victim to a player or just a typical unthinking idiot who was only after a casual relationship and just assumed that you did too. He's probably found something else that's piqued his interest
It never ceases to amaze me how many people seem to think it's okay to behave like this -it isn't, it's really rude.
Unfortunately, this guy is going to have to be confined to your "aquarium of experience" where you put all the frogs that you had to kiss before your handsome prince came along.
I know you feel bad and used right now but don't dwell on it too much. You did everything right....
Take care
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 November 2013):
Hi,
Sorry to tell you this, but you were or would have been a one night stand. I wouldn't bother contacting thus guy again. You don't need someone like this in your life.
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