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I saw my boyfriend kiss another girl!

Tagged as: Cheating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 June 2011) 5 Answers - (Newest, 8 June 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, *ick in the teeth writes:

i saw my bf kiss another girl but he conntinues to kiss and hug he, but im not sure what i should do because i know he loves me but after i saw that im now not so sure. we have been going out for 3 years and he made me wear a promise ring that i wouldnt cheat on him and i dont know what to do its driving me crazy

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (8 June 2011):

Honeypie agony auntSo you wear a promise ring for him. Promising not to cheat, but it's ok that he cheats? Doesn't that sound wrong to you? Like a double standard?

Honey, you deserve better and it's about time you realize it.

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A female reader, totty-flossy United Kingdom +, writes (8 June 2011):

totty-flossy agony auntDoes he know you saw him kiss this other girl? I'm not being funny but if i saw my boyfriend kiss another girl believe me they would both know about it!

You must be really sweet and soft to have not said anything yet, either that or your just really in love and scared of loosing him but either way you need to tell him that you saw it! He cannot treat you that way! it is unfair and you will end up breaking up because you will develop trust issues and end up being unhappy!

Tell him you saw him kiss her and that your deeply upset about it! He needs to make it up to you by proving that he loves you with actions and not words! He needs to earn your trust back and make every effort to make you happy and forgive him! If he loves you then he will be more than willing to do this for you but if not and he wont put this effort in then he isn't worth it and deffinately not good enough for you and its time to let go and move on! but before you even start getting upset about breaking up you really need to confront him and judge his reaction for yoursrlf! xxx

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (8 June 2011):

I would say that your boyfriend is a bit of a controlling hypocrite to be honest. Truth is, you really can't be sure he loves you if he treats you this way. I think that you might just be better moving on.

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A female reader, Y_v United Kingdom +, writes (8 June 2011):

Y_v agony auntHe should not have given you that promise ring!! He is such a hypocrite!! Shame on him!

What you need to do is confront him, ask him straight in the face if he has been kissing other girls. If he lies then you definately should ditch him. Loyalty and trust are the most vital things in a long-term relationship. If you can't trust him because he's not being loyal then unfortunately it just won't work.

However if he tells you the truth and apologises. It will take time to heal over this issue but i'm sure because you love him soo much you can learn to forgive him. I know a lot of people say that 'once a cheat, always a cheat'.. but it's up to you to give him another chance. He needs to find a way to gain your trust again. You need to put your foot down and never let this happen ever again.

Confronting him is the only way to decide whether he is worth your love :)

Hope it all goes ok and this helped in SOME way :)

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A female reader, Battista United Kingdom +, writes (8 June 2011):

Leave him. He's cheated on you and clearly thinks he can get away with it. I would question how much he actually loves you if he has been kissing another woman.

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