A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I wrote a girl a letter this past week telling her how special she meant to me. Considering she hasn't written back, I'm assuming she must be freaking out. I am such an Idiot!!! For once, I've decided to pour out my heart to someone I like and it backfires. I have no chance with her anymore. She must think I'm desperate and weak. What do I do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 You just sit tight and do nothing until you get a response from her. Do not write to her until you know where she stands on this issue.
You need to make sure, your letter was received by her and not lost in the mail or got misplaced.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to all of you who responded to my ordeal. You folks are just too kind. It is good to know that there are many quality people out there.
You are right...I let this get way, way, way out of proportion. The thing is that I totally screwed it up with this girl. Initially, we both shared the attraction for one other until the "games" entered on her part. I assumed she just wanted to be just friends so I stayed away. She then began to give me that distant cold shoulder and tries to make me jealous by talking about other guys. I was totally confused. In any event, this led me to write my letter. I have an impression that she has been hurt in the past by a bad relationship. I guess maybe that is why she is playing these games...to make sure. I just wanted to let her to know that I would never hurt her. That I would shoulder her sadness and gently wipe away all her tears. She deserves that
I just don't know if I should just stay away or continue writing to her. My ego is saying leave her alone...but, my heart is saying "I'll never give up on you"
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (19 February 2008):
It could come as a shock to her and it may take time for it to sink into her mind.
You need to give her more time to reply.
Be patient and have faith. Your reply will be coming soon.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Firstly, are you fully sure she got the letter - there might be some technical mistake. She may have a boyfriend, she may be extremely shy and not know how to approach you, she may be a bit embarrased, she may think it's a joke, she may be really taken by surprise etc. The point is is that there a tons of reasons why she hasn't replied-yet she may just need time to acknowledge your feelings for her and her feelings. Speaking personally though, i absolutely adore sensitive guys and all the girls i know find guys like you soo sweet and romantic, we are especially caring and nurturing and i think it's unlikely that she thinks of you as weak or pathetic. If she does then this girl probably isn't a very nice person or just immature for her age. YOU are a dreamboat in my opinion and you've done evrything you can, please DONT REGRET IT-the worst regret is when guys/girls don't tell ppl hw they feel and end up losing somebody, just wait for her response now, you're obviously destined for happiness whatever happens x
...............................
A
male
reader, Abacadaba  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 Youve done what i never could. Ive written letters before, but never got round to delivering them. Yea ok you might feel a bit down because she hasnt replied etc. But dont think about it just for this girl, think about when you get a girl who absolutely loves the fact you can show your emotion. Just be careful not to wear your heart on your sleeve too oftern, else youll just end up with alot of heartbreak. If she thinks your desperate and weak, then shes not worth worrying over. Past 2 years ive been on a dry patch with women, put my heart and soul into 1 girl for a year and a half and got absolutely nowhere, now ive met a girl who, from what i can tell, will enjoy being made a fuss over, and im sticking with her for the fact i can be mr romantic and not worry about what she thinks of me, because she will love it!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Please don't beat yourself up about it! You haven't committed a heinous crime you have simply written a love letter! Lots of women love to get love letters and there aren't enough of them about in option. I'd love to receive a love letter from boyfriend or even an admirer come to that. You are not weak and desperate, in fact you are brave and strong to write down your feelings..............a lot of men can barely admit they HAVE any feelings never mind write them down. She should be flattered and touched to get the letter and even if she does take it the wrong way, then that would say more about her than you. You made a beautiful gesture to her and even if she doesn't feel the same way she should appreciate the gesture and respect you for it.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): OMG Wow!! That is such a romantic thing to do for a girl!! I don't know any guy who would do that, and personally speaking I would love it if a guy wrote me a letter expressing his feelings for me. The art of letter writing is practically deady these days with e-mails/txts etc that no one sits down to actually write proper letter any more so thats why it is all the more special when some one does it :) Don't be putting yourself down for writing the letter, maybe there was a delay in the post and she only got it recently and is still in awe over it. I hope she realises what a lucky girl she is, you sound like the sweetest guy :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Wow, a bloke who writes his feelings down in this day and age, what a lucky girl. I wish i could get a letter off my bloke!!! She is probably just taking time to read it and re read it, i would. Dont put yourself down though, even if you dont hear from her. That is a lovely, special and caring thing to do, so never knock yourself.
take care
xx
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Honey, she's probably just a little surprised and amazed at what you've wrote down. I think writing a girl a letter expressing how special she is is an amazing idea, and I'm sure she doesn't think you're desperate and weak. Unless she's a real tomboy, or a girl that isn't particularly into girly things, then I'm sure she'll be over the moon that she recieved it from you. Don't feel like I fool honey, you did a great thing for her, and I hope she just realises how lucky she is.
...............................
|
