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I only hear from him when he is on leave ... I don't want to be his booty call.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 May 2018) 2 Answers - (Newest, 13 May 2018)
A female United States age 22-25, *848b writes:

to start me and my ex were together for years he joined the army we were together for 2 year of the 3 year enlistment he has, and once he went on deployment, 1 month before he got back he ended it and said it was because he didn't want me waiting for him, and I understand it now. But after he got back from deployment he started talking to me again saying he wanted me and he didn't know why he ended it but then went into the field on base ( which means he has training in the woods, he'll be off the grid for a few days) in the middle of that he told me we had to stop talking, which of course hurt but I stopped talking to him, and now every time he goes on leave thats when ill get a message from him. I'm just starting to feel myself again and I'm getting over him but something just keeps telling me to not give up on him. I know need my space and I don't know how to go about telling him or if I should even take the time to tell him since I only hear from when when he goes on leave, I don't want him thinking that when he visit home that I'm his booty call, cause thats not happening.

View related questions: booty call, my ex

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (13 May 2018):

Honeypie agony auntYep, I agree.

You are in fact ALLOWING this by 1. being available and 2. thinking he wants to get back with you for good.

You say:"something just keeps telling me to not give up on him" but OP - he gave up on you a long while ago. He just stringing you along so his leave time isn't so lonely.

This yo-yo thing he is pulling is to keep you from moving on and thus be available for WHEN he wants a girl to talk to, a girl who pays attention to him and gives him affection and when he wants to "just" be single and focus on work... he stops contacting you.

While MANY units don't allow phones/tech while in the field - this has nothing to do with how he is treating you.

He keeps reeling you in and then tells you - we can't talk. KNOWING full well that it hurts you every time, yet it doesn't stop him from doing so.

I'd say wish him will in life, BLOCK all contact and DELETE all him contact info. Time for you to move on.

OR you can waste the BEST times of your 20's on a guy who REALLY doesn't want to date you.

Your move. Your choice.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom + , writes (13 May 2018):

N91 agony auntBlock him.

Very simple, if he can’t contact you then you can’t be a booty call. You’re well aware that’s what he’s after so why are you replying? Why allow him to contact you? Block him.

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