A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi im going on a first date tomorrow we are both shy people with out alcohol and have only met face to face after a drink.please give me some tips and topics to talk about but nothing to cheesy as i am 18.i now i must be myself but what else will help..??
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female
reader, Love_is_all_youu_need +, writes (9 February 2010):
 If you're both shy then it is a necessity to prepare yourself a few topics to talk about to avoid those awkward silences. So you have done the right thing by asking this question :)
I'll tell you a bit about my first-date experience. I am quite shy and reserved (until i get to know the person very well) so I was obviously very nervous about the date. The other times I had seen him, I was under the influence of alcohol - but this was a date; a chance for us to get to know each other so I had to show him my true self! But that didn't stop me having a sneaky bottle of beer down back of an alley to control my nerves beforehand lol. However, I ended up getting slightly drunk anyway because he bought me 2 vodka's :)
If possible, I would definately recommend you both having a drink or two (enough to give you that bit more confidence, but not enough to make you drunk) - it will help the conversation flow more smoothly. Anyway, in reference to your question; Conversion! Well, the whole point in dates is to get to know the other person better - so don't hesitate to ask questions about his family, occupation etc. Just don't dig too personal, for example his past relationships. It also helps to have a sense of humour, make a few jokes here and there! Have in mind a few funny stories you would like to share with him. Serious dates are boring, so try to have a laugh with each other :)
One last thing, BE YOURSELF! Don't pretend to be someone you are not.
All the best
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2010): Hey, baby.. girls like to talk AND BE HEARD. So don't talk too much. Here's why... Girls like a guy who listens more than he talks, and he probably knows this by now, so don't make him work too hard on the listening or you'll scare him away. If you met on a drink or two, do that again on the next date, and you'll open up to each other faster. Alcohol will definitely help, but not too much, of course. This way you won't have to worry what to say, it will just happen. If you want to try the completely sober way, just ask him questions about himself, and you'll be able to better connect with things that you'll find are similar between you and him. If you feel too shy, take a friend with you for the first one or two dates. Don't smother him with other friends or your family, at first though, and everything will be just fine. Just dissect him with the odd question, and you'll become instantly closer from what you know, unless you don't like some of the things you find out about him. BEST OF LUCK, BUT FIRST DATE DON'T
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