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I need help to get over on something that never started.

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Question - (23 April 2010) 5 Answers - (Newest, 24 April 2010)
A female United States age 41-50, *azzy10 writes:

I'm so confuse, I meet this guys a week ago we really like each other the chemistry and the attraction is mutual, finally we decided to meet and talk after work, on my way there my heart was racing a million mile per hour.

The dinner was fine we complimented on each other over and over how we really like each other and attractive we were we stared at each ect...

then told him that i was not looking for a relationship but i will be open to a friendship that he told me that he has been seeing someone for the past year and half and that he doent want to take advantage of me, I said thats fine with me. on our way to the car we went to say good night and he grab me and gave me the best hug ever i felt myself meeting into his arms like much and couldnt help it and i hugged him back. It was magic we needed to stop a few time because the passion was a little too much, we kissed,hugged,ect for a while, he kept saying that he would not like to take advantage of me but he didnt stopped, I did expressed to him that it up to him because he is the one on a relationship and he is the only one that know his situation, and in my opinion obiously there something missing there because he is here with me. we said our goodbye and left.

the next day I sent him and e-mail thanking him for dinner, the night after he called me to tell me how amazing how much he really likes me and how he likes that am so open witty and that he is very atractive to me but that he told me he was on a relationship I told him thats fine and that I wish him good luck then he asked me if he can call me and be friends I really told him he shouldnt I least not right now.

today he called for question about the college application that I need to come in and sign I told him that I rather them send me the papers and I will mail them back.

But this is my reality I can stop thinking about him, his kisses I keep re-playing that night over and over in my mind.

I need help how to get over for something that never started.

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A female reader, jazzy10 United States +, writes (24 April 2010):

jazzy10 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you so much for your answers, its was just what I wanted to hear!

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A female reader, raiders United States +, writes (24 April 2010):

raiders agony auntVery simple just stop, think on the situation he is in a relationship and I'm sure you don't want to become the other women. Stop it now that you have no time invested in this relationship. Right now you might find him attractive and funny but you don't love him, so this would be the perfect time to put distance between you two.

Think on the outcomes if you were to become his lover, you will see him when ever he can, you have to be in hiding, you both will be lying and deceiving his girlfriend, and than you fall in love and can't live with out him, what does he do he goes and marries his girlfriend has a family and still has you on the side-promising that he will leave her one day for you, but that day never gets here.

Its better that you put a stop to right now that you have no feeling/time invested on this man.

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A female reader, merlyn846 United States +, writes (23 April 2010):

merlyn846 agony auntignore him...... two people that have so much passion and feelings towards eachother cannot be friends because eventually something will happen... he's in a realtionship so dont let him lead you on because in the end you are the one that is gonna wind up getting hurt... if he is not willing to be with you and WITH YOU ONLY... why stick around and wait... theres plenty of other guys ...you will meet someone =]

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A female reader, Kassi (Nova) Canada +, writes (23 April 2010):

Kassi (Nova) agony auntThis is such a bad idea.

His relationship is probably just fine. Women who are attracted to men who are dating someone else always use the "there must be something missing" excuse to justify stealing some other woman's boyfriend. Sorry, hon, but men aren't easily monogamous. When he says he doesn't want to take advantage of you, what he means is that if anything were to happen, it would be a one time thing, and he wouldn't be leaving his girlfriend. You're putting yourself in a bad situation, to be used, and to really hurt someone else. Even if the relationship IS over for him, it probably isn't for his girlfriend. Dropping yourself into the middle of that mess is just going to make things ugly.

What you don't know about his situation and relationship could fill a swimming pool.

At this point, you don't know much about him, if anything at all, other than that he's hot and you have chemistry. But that isn't everything, and it's superficial. You're infatuated, not in love. Worse- he's taken. Move on and get your own boyfriend.

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A female reader, deedee64 United States +, writes (23 April 2010):

just let him go... don't email him or call him or text msg to him for a while until he get back to you and let him realize it .. that my best advice to you.

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