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I need help on how to approach someone who liked me but now seems to be ignoring me

Tagged as: Dating, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 April 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 19 April 2011)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hi, hears how it goes...

this guy approached me whilst i was at work and i had absolutely no idea he liked me even though he had spoken to me a few times that night, at the end of the night, kick out time, he asked me for my number, i had no idea he liked me and thought to myself before hand nah! so when he approached me i was shocked and didnt know what to do and accidentally turned him down, i'd had a bad day but the next day i found him on facebook and said hi, sorry if i made u feel like a twat... do u still want my number?

anyway after a few messages on facebook he just stopped replying, he'd said at one point, it was kinda outa the blue, i dont want to lead u on but just got out of a 2year relationship and just want fun.

i said fine and kinda decided and decoded this for myself. but after this he only replied to me once and never again mentioned goin for a drink, although i agreed that i would like to.

the next time i saw him i wasnt sure if it was him so didnt say hi then felt like a twat as after he walked past i was sure it had been him, i saw him again at a pub and nodded at him but didnt get a chance to speak, a few days later sent him a message saying just wondering do u still wanna go for a drink sometime,

the thing is its been nearly 2weeks and he's been on facebook, hes got my number and no response what so ever, am i to assume he might reply later when the academic term restarts or that he has completely lost interest? i think unless i bump into him and get a chance to talk, whcih is quite unlikely, then it's completely out of my control because i cant send more messages without looking pathetic.

is there anything i can do without looking a stalker, i made sure to avoid that route and wouldnt know how to do it anyway

any advice is welcome and sorry for the long rant

View related questions: at work, facebook

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A male reader, aaringurl Philippines +, writes (19 April 2011):

Nice to hear that from you.. keep those fingers crossed...

YKW - You know what?? ... hehe

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i appreciate all 3 of your answers and can see where all of you are coming from, thanks for the responses

i think i should leave him to the chasing after i messaged him over 2weeks ago and havent had a response, hes got my numer so the rest is down to him and if he doesnt bother then its a definite cut. blunt is best with most responses and i appreciate that. i really wont resort to the stalker thing cause thats pretty low and desperate, maybe when im 40 and no one wants me lol. and building a world around someone i've only had short conversations with over one night and on facebook would be ott so definitly going to try to remember that. slow mover wpuld definitly be perfect for me, i probably wouldnt want commitment as much as he would as i'm kinda crazy and need to remember not to dive in.

thankyou for all the comments

and what does YKW stand for??

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A male reader, jc2008 United Kingdom +, writes (17 April 2011):

Don't waste your time with someone who doesn't know what they want. Sorry for the bluntness but i'd consider cutting contact and let him chase you if he changes his mind, don't wait for him.

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A male reader, aaringurl Philippines +, writes (16 April 2011):

Okay first things first, don't build a world around him. You'd only get hurt if you attach yourself too close to a guy you're unsure of. Just because he showed interest in you once doesn't mean he's the only guy worth your investment. He could totally be sweet and gentie, or be an axx xxle. That guy, as you've said, had just broken up with someone, and his hmmm .. the way he'd be thinking right now won't be the best of him. Think this, how many else out there he had possibly asked numbers from? And if you try and stalk him or whatever, would only worsen the chance you could have something going on with you two, he'd see you as someone annoying or very aggressive, no one really wants to be preyed upon.

Don't chase him. Don't think about him. Actually, get him out of your system, I mean, totally. YKW, I really do believe in the saying, that if something really is meant for you, it'll come to you. Let him roam around, give him some space to think things through and fix his life. So just wait, ... maybe one of these days, that guy would message you again asking to really go out and work something out. And till then, continue your life like he still wasn't in it, ^.^ good luck!

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